Punk'd: Cullen Style
by SG51169
Summary: Emmett loves playing pranks and his new target is his favorite human, Bella Swan. But when he goes too far an angry Edward and Alice decide that it's time to teach Emmett a lesson. Emmett is about to get Punk'd...Cullen style!
1. An Angry Vampire Is Never A Good Thing

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

**Summary: **One weekend. A big brother who loves to tease and play jokes on his favorite human/little sister. Another brother who happens to be the extremely protective fiancé of the human, and one vision-gifted sister who may just be scarier than the fiancé when the safety of her little sister is jeopardized. Human tears, a hospital emergency room and two very angry vampires! It's time for revenge. Watch out Emmett, you're going to get Punk'd…Cullen Style!

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**Chapter One: An Angry Vampire Is Never a Good Thing**

Edward Cullen was in a very bad mood as he sped back to Forks in his Volvo, and an angry vampire is never a good thing. An angry vampire in love with a human, obsessed with her safety as she happens to be a magnet for danger, is an especially bad thing to cross. And when someone or something causes this vampire's human love to cry or come to harm, even unintentionally, well, that is something to be avoided at all costs. Carlisle Cullen, sitting in the passenger seat, was sneaking concerned glances at his extremely angry and worried son, wondering if his daughter Rosalie would still have a mate at the end of the day. Jasper Cullen sat in the backseat, desperately trying to send waves of calm to his brother, but Edward's fury was too strong to tamp down. His Bella was hurt, Emmett was involved and there was going to be hell to pay…


	2. Plans for the Weekend

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Two: Plans for the Weekend**

**Edward's POV**

Emmett had finally crossed the line. It was one thing for him to tease and harass me about everything from "being too old-fashioned and no fun" to "too bad you're not getting any, Eddie" comments concerning my relationship with Bella. He acts like an oversized kid at times, but I'd been around him for the better part of a century and it was nothing I couldn't handle. Even when he teased Bella, I didn't worry much because Bella takes his teasing in stride, treating him like the older brother she never had, although at times his comments have embarrassed her. When Emmett heads in that direction I step in immediately. No one is going to make my Bella uncomfortable like that without paying a price. But when the same older brother makes my Bella cry, I see red. And when it results in Bella ending up in a hospital emergency room, I don't just see red, I see _vampire _red. Blood red. _Emmett is dead meat_, I thought, _or whatever qualifies as the equivalent of dead meat for a vampire!_ I was so angry, I couldn't come up with the proper analogy for Emmett's soon-to-be state of existence, or more accurately non-existence!

It all started when I left for a weekend hunting trip with Jasper and Carlisle. It had been a couple of weeks since I'd hunted anything other than deer or whatever the nearby forest had to offer, but none of these animals had been able to fully sate my thirst. I needed to hunt the larger prey and the only way to do that was to venture further away from our nearby hunting grounds. Bella had noticed how quickly my eyes would turn black again after a recent hunt and the purple shadows under my eyes which wouldn't fade. She realized my thirst was not being satisfied by the local game and had ordered me to take off this weekend and hunt the larger game at Goat Rocks. Alice decided to invite Bella to stay the weekend, which Charlie readily agreed to after having first confirmed that I would be nowhere near the house while Bella was in residence.

Emmett decided he was going to stay behind this weekend. I should have known something was up when Emmett turned down a chance to hunt "irritable grizzlies." Since he had just returned from a hunting trip with Rosalie I didn't give it much thought.

I had no reason to believe it wouldn't be anything but a nice, relaxing weekend for Bella. Of course she was going to have to be patient with Alice, as Alice had a full weekend of playing "let's dress Bella" in mind. Alice was eager to spend some quality time with Bella, as Bella and I had pretty much monopolized each other's attention over the past couple of weeks and Alice was missing her best friend. I felt guilty so I was agreeable to her plan to have Bella to herself this weekend, as long as Bella was agreeable to the plan as well, which she was.

Bella insisted she would be fine. She said she would feel better knowing I wouldn't worry about her all weekend if she was with Alice instead of on her own. Plus the thought of me coming home early on Sunday and our being able to spend the whole day and night together before she went back to Charlie's was more than enough incentive for her to endure whatever tortures Alice had planned for the weekend. _My brave Bella! _I thought as she lay in my arms the night before my hunting trip, fast asleep while I alternated humming her lullaby and placing soft kisses near her ear, neck and hair.

I trusted Alice implicitly with Bella's safety while I was gone. My sister would never let anything happen to Bella. Which is why I was very surprised when Alice called me early Saturday afternoon to tell me that Bella was in the emergency room at Forks General…


	3. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Three: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun**

**Alice's POV**

I had such high hopes for the weekend. I'd looked ahead and all my visions showed a happy weekend with Bella. She was in a relaxed and light mood and hardly a complaint about the manicures, pedicures, make-up sessions and shopping that I had planned for the two of us. It was a small miracle in and of itself, but to me it was proof of Bella's love for me, allowing me to have my fun, and I loved her even more for it. The only thing I hadn't foreseen was Emmett's decision to stay behind. It would be a decision that changed everything about my weekend with my best friend and sister to be.

I arrived at Bella's house on Friday afternoon. Charlie was home early, so I parked my beautiful yellow Porsche behind his police cruiser in the driveway. Running quickly up the steps, but not so quickly that it drew attention from any neighbors who might be looking out their windows, I knocked on the front door before opening and calling out, "Hello? Charlie, Bella?" I knew they were both home, but I had to keep up appearances.

I heard Charlie's voice calling from the kitchen. "Alice, honey, is that you?"

"It's me!" I cheerfully replied as I made my way to the kitchen. I loved Charlie. He was always so kind and he was fond of me, ever since the incident with James when Bella came home from Phoenix in a cast. I came over every day to help Bella maneuver around and assist her with her shower and dressing. What girl wouldn't want to help her sister in her time of need, and I told Charlie as much. When he heard me refer to Bella as being like a "sister", he was touched, and ever since then he's treated me as if I were another daughter. He's very sweet.

"Hey sweetie, good to see you," he replied with a smile as he came over to give me a hug. It's a good thing I was wearing a thick jacket…he would have noticed the chill from my body.

"Bella's upstairs, getting everything together for your weekend. So…I understand from Bella you're going to be doing "girl stuff" this weekend?" he said with a chuckle, no doubt imagining Bella's feelings about a whole weekend of doing "girl stuff."

"Yes, Charlie, we're going to have a completely relaxing weekend, with manicures, facials, pedicures. We're going to check out the latest Paris fashions on the internet and on Saturday we're going to see what we can find in the shops in Port Angeles," I said enthusiastically, rocking back and forth on my heels. I was very excited about the weekend. "I'm so excited Bella's agreed to do this. It's been so busy the last couple of weeks and I've missed hanging out with my best friend!"

Charlie started to laugh. "Yes, well, Bella hasn't been able to talk about anything else this week, although I thought I heard a couple of "what will the little pixie do to me this weekend" thrown in here and there under her breath." He laughed again. "Try to go a little easy on her, okay? I'd like her back in once piece."

"Sure thing, Charlie!" I said with a laugh. _Oh, Bella! I think those comments are worth making you try on __two__ extra outfits and you __will__ be letting me buy you that beautiful blue top that make Edward's eyes pop out of his head!_ Somehow I didn't think the last part would be a problem for Bella!

"So, Edward will be out of town this weekend?" Charlie was suddenly serious as he asked this question, looking at me very carefully. _Still having problems forgiving Edward for his "mistake" last fall, _I thought, _but at least he's trying, for Bella's sake. _

"Oh yes, he's going to be with Carlisle and Jasper. They've decided to do a little hiking this weekend up near Mt. Rainier, in the backcountry. Something about male bonding, chest beating and some other nonsense," I said as I rolled my eyes. Charlie's lips twitched as he struggled not to laugh. "My big brother Emmett is going to be around to make sure we're safe, although if he knows what's good for him he's going to let us girls be girls and will make himself scarce!"

At this Charlie laughed outright. "Alice, honey, I have no doubt you will be able to keep him or any other male in their place! Well, go on upstairs. Go see if Bella is ready. I'm sure she's eager to start the weekend."

"Thanks Charlie! We'll be back down in just a bit," I said as I started up the stairs, Charlie's laughter fading in the background.

"Bella!" I yelled as I neared her door. "The little pixie has arrived to take you away for all that "girl stuff" she has planned this weekend!"

"Uh, what did you say, Alice?" Bella's face appeared from behind the door, looking worried about my reaction to the "little pixie" reference.

"Oh, come on Bella. Puh-leeze!" I said, exaggerating the last word and rolling my eyes. "As if I hadn't already seen you making those comments in one of my visions! Although this time you have your dad to thank for passing on that little tidbit of information."

"Charlie told you I said that?!" Bella said, shocked that her dad would rat her out that way.

"What can I say, he loves me…" I said as I blew on my finger tips and polished them on my shoulder.

This time it was Bella who rolled her eyes at me.

"Okay, okay, you caught me. Actually, I'm looking forward to the weekend, Alice. We haven't spent much time together lately and I've missed hanging out with my best friend. So, I am willingly putting myself into your care and keeping. Please show mercy; 10-15 minute breaks every 3-4 hours would be much appreciated!" Bella teased.

"All right, but only if you're a good girl," I teased back. "But don't you think for a second I'm not going to make you pay for those "little pixie" remarks. The price is you have to try on two additional outfits AND you're going to let me buy this beautiful blue top..." I said before being interrupted by Bella.

"No Alice, you are not going to be spending money on me."

Time to call in the big guns. "But Bella, this top is so beautiful and it's in Edward's favorite color. I had a vision of you in this top and Edward couldn't take his eyes off you, or his arms, or his hands, or his lips..."

Bella knew she'd lost this one, especially when I threw in the comments about Edward's eyes, arms, hands and lips. In fact, at this point she had no problem with me buying the complete outfit which I planned to do anyway. She threw her hands into the air. "Fine! One blue blouse and two extra outfits to model, but that's it!"

I could afford to be generous after winning this concession from Bella. "Deal! Let's go!" I said, excited for the start of our weekend.


	4. Who's Scaring Who Around Here?

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Four: Who's Scaring Who Around Here?**

**Emmett's POV**

Oh man! I am in deep trouble! If it were possible for vampires to hyperventilate, I would have passed out by now! Edward and Alice are coming for me and I am scared out of my mind. Yes, me, Emmett Cullen, all powerful, strong, fearless, undefeatable Emmett Cullen. The Emmett Cullen who right this minute is praying, _"Please, dear god, someone, anyone, hide me!" _If vampires could wet their pants, my pants would have the biggest spot spreading down the leg! Mr. Emo Vampire and The Vengeful Pixie are out to get me!

I never meant for anything bad to happen to Bella. How could I have known she would end up in the hospital emergency room the day after she arrived at the house? I only wanted to have some fun with my little sister, and give her an opportunity to let loose, relax a little, not worry about the rules. Edward is so protective, he never let's her do anything! Don't get me wrong. I love my brother. I have the deepest respect for him and with Jasper there is no one else I'd rather have by my side in a fight than Edward. But he's obsessed with Bella's safety and I just wanted her to have a chance to let go without hearing Edward say _"what if this or that happens" _or _"danger has a way of finding you." _With Edward it's always _"what if this" _or _"what if that" _when it comes to Bella. Come on, like I would ever let anything happen to my little sister…

Wait…epiphany happening here.

_Bella, self-described danger-magnet... _

_My favorite human and soon-to-be sister Bella, danger-magnet extraordinaire…_

_My favorite human and soon-to-be sister Bella who has no problem attracting trouble within a 10 mile radius, danger-magnet extraordinaire! _

_I AM DEAD MEAT, or whatever is the equivalent of dead meat for vampires! _

I should have listened to the little voice of reason in my head that sounded an awful lot like Carlisle and Jasper combined.

It started out innocent enough. Bella was going to stay the weekend with Alice while Edward went hunting. Rosalie and I had come back from our hunting trip in Goat Rocks just a few days ago and when I found out Bella was going to be here I couldn't resist staying behind. It's rare to catch Bella without Edward nowadays, and vice versa, so I never get a chance to prank her. Edward always hears my thoughts before I can even attempt to pull one on her. Now that he was going to be gone for a whole weekend, there was nothing to stop me from targeting my favorite little human and having a few good laughs at her expense. All I had to do was not tip off Alice and her visions. She'd catch me for sure. But I knew that if I didn't make any decisions until the very moment of playing the prank, she wouldn't be able to stop me.

In my mind I could hear a devious little chuckle sound off as I imagined pulling one over on my clairvoyant sister. Wait, got to be careful, don't want to tip her off!

Yes, my plans were foolproof.

I pulled the first prank as Bella and Alice pulled into the garage Friday afternoon. Rosalie was working on my Jeep and I was in the garage helping her. Alice wouldn't be suspicious seeing me in the garage. So far, everything was going perfect.

Rosalie left the garage to go back to the house for an instruction manual she'd left in our room. Alice stepped out the car and was immediately distracted by a small dent she spotted on her side of the car. Keeping my thoughts and intentions completely clear and blank, I glided over to Bella's side and as she stepped out of the car I jumped out and roared, "BELLA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I have never seen a human jump as high as Bella did in that moment. Only Bella could jump and then _trip in mid-air_ on her way back to the ground. She fell on her hands and knees before I could catch her, looking up at me with eyes that looked like they were ready to pop out of their sockets, the pupils fully dilated. Wow! This was better than I had ever dreamed possible, figuratively speaking of course.

However, a second later it wasn't funny anymore. All the blood drained completely from her face as she became as white as a vampire, and then her heart stopped as did her breathing. Uh-oh, not good!!! Human not breathing, human with no heartbeat! _Oh crap, crap, crap!!!_ I thought to myself. "Bella, breathe!" I yelled at her.

"Emmett! What the hell do you think you're doing?" screamed Alice as she flew to Bella's side.

"Breathe, Bella, breathe! Please, breathe!" Alice cried out as she alternated gently patting and rubbing Bella's back, before easily lifting her from the garage floor and placing her on a nearby bench. No breathing…no heartbeat…nothing.

I frantically yelled over and over, "Oh man, I killed her! I literally scared her to death!" as I circled around Bella like a dog chasing its tail. _I'm dead! I'm dead! I am so dead!_

Suddenly Bella's heart began beating again as she gasped for air and the blood returned to her face. Normally a simple thing like a human blushing can trigger a vampire's thirst, but all I could feel in that moment was relief she was breathing, and that my life, or existence, was safe for the time being.

I was in for another scare when just a second later her heartbeat began to speed up, beating faster than was humanly safe.

"Please Bella, I'm sorry! I didn't think…" I started to say before I was interrupted by a visibly angry Alice who was trembling in the effort to keep her anger under control.

While she hadn't yet attacked me, she did start yelling at me. "Well, that's what happens when you don't think, Emmett!!! You practically sent her into cardiac arrest! And she still might go into one if we can't get her heart rate back to normal!" she yelled as she slapped me upside the head.

"Ow! Alice, that hurt!" I said, rubbing my head. How can something so tiny be so loud and hit so hard? "I didn't mean to scare her so badly. I just wanted to have a little fun with my favorite human. It was a joke…"

"Oh sure, Emmett!" said Alice, still irate. "And how do you think it would be if I had to call Edward to let him know that YOU scared his fiancée to death? Tell me, do you think that you, me, Rosalie or Esme has the necessary control to safely bite Bella and start the transformation, since Carlisle and Edward wouldn't be here to do it if she had gone into cardiac arrest!? Not to mention the fact that if her heart is no longer beating, how would the venom flow through her bloodstream? Did you think about that???"

I felt another slap to my head. Ow! I was feeling pretty bad at this point.

Bella continued taking quick breaths, trying to calm her breathing while holding her hand to her heart.

"Bella, I'm really, really sorry." I said again. "I honestly didn't think it would scare you that badly. I will never do that again, I mean it."

Bella looked up at me, tears at the corners of her eyes as she started to calm down. "Emmett, it's okay. Just give me a chance to get my breath back and my heart back to normal. I forgive you." She gave me a small smile, letting me know all was well, or soon would be. "I know my big brother would never intentionally harm me. I'll be fine."

I breathed a sigh of relief as Bella carefully stood up and took a wobbly first step towards Alice. Alice shot me a dirty look as she put her arm around Bella to steady her. Bella took a few more steps, each more stable than the last, before Alice released her hold on Bella and followed her out of the garage and into the house.

Scary…sometimes I don't know my own strength!

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A/N: So, what do you think? Should this story be continued? How do you like the story being told through each character's point of view? Please read and review, let me know what you think. Just click on the little green button below, all it takes is a sentence to let me know if you like/don't like. Thanks!


	5. A Cure For the Common Scare

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Five: A Cure for the Common Scare**

**Alice's POV**

I followed Bella into the house, moving at human speed since she was still a little off-balance and walking very slowly. I wanted to make sure she didn't stumble or fall down again and steered her carefully towards the kitchen where Esme was waiting with a glass of cold water.

Esme had been in her bedroom, working on plans for Edward and Bella's room in the Alaska house. She'd heard everything that had happened in the garage and was trying to contain her anger towards Emmett. It takes a lot to make Esme angry, but she considered Bella a daughter and was especially protective of her because she was so fragile and prone to getting hurt. Esme thought it best to wait inside the house and had gone down to the kitchen to wait for us.

I moved Bella towards one of the stools next to the kitchen island. She quickly sat down and gratefully accepted the glass of water from Esme. I knew water wouldn't be enough to help her. Bella had had a shock and I was wracking my brain trying to remember what Edward had done for her after her near attack in Port Angeles. _Damn that Emmett, he has me so distracted I can't think straight! _I muttered under my breath before calming down enough to remember that Edward made her drink a soda for the sugar.

"Esme, are there sodas in the refrigerator?" I asked Esme. "Bella needs to drink something with sugar in it."

Esme pulled a cola from the refrigerator and quickly opened and poured the drink into another glass before handing it to Bella with a straw. Bella drank deeply. _She's definitely in shock_, I thought to myself, as she quickly finished off the drink.

"Bella, are you feeling okay? You're not lightheaded or feeling faint, are you?" I asked softly, not wanting to startle her or do anything to get her heart racing again.

"I'm fine, Alice. I feel okay," Bella said as she placed the glass on the countertop. "Thank you, Esme; that was just what I needed."

"You're welcome, dear," said Esme, worry still evident on her beautiful face. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Really, Esme, I'm fine." Bella tried to reassure her, but I knew better than to take that statement at face-value without challenging her. Of course Bella would always say she felt fine, even if "feeling fine" meant she was lying in a hospital bed with a broken leg in traction, cracked ribs, dislocated collarbone and a concussion. This girl hated attention!

I gave her my most stern expression and asked, "Oh, _really_, Bella? That's what you always say whenever you've been hurt. I want the absolute truth! Are you okay?"

Bella looked as if she were about to roll her eyes, but stopped when she saw the worried expressions on mine and Esme's faces. I think it occurred to her that she wasn't the only one to almost go into cardiac arrest. The two vampires standing in front of her, the ones with the dead, unbeating hearts, had also gotten the scares of their lives and wanted to be sure that she was truly fine.

Bella was touched by our concern. "Okay, I'm mostly fine. I've never been that frightened which is saying a lot considering this human regularly hangs out with seven vampires and will soon be marrying one of them!" She was trying to lighten the mood. "Really…I'm still here; the human's heart is still going strong."

I carefully scrutinized her face and then closed my eyes to look into the future. I could see she would be fine, if my idiot brother didn't try to pull another stupid stunt! I was going to be keeping my "eye" on him!

"Okay, Miss Swan, I believe you, but you're going to march yourself right up to Edward's room and you're going to take a nap. You still look pale and I want you at 100% for the rest of the weekend. No arguments!" I said in my best authoritative voice.

Bella looked at me and with a wink at Esme raised her right hand and swiftly saluted me saying, "Sir! Yes, Sir!" as if she were taking orders from her captain.

I laughed, knowing that if Bella was teasing me it meant she would be fine. Esme also looked relieved and followed as we made our way up the stairs.

Once we made sure Bella was resting comfortably on Edward's bed, I marched myself downstairs at vampire speed, ready to have a come-to-Jesus meeting with my big brother!


	6. It's What You Don't Say That Counts

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Six: It's What You Don't Say That Counts**

**Alice's POV:**

I made my way back to the garage and found Emmett standing next to his Jeep, handing Rosalie tools as needed.

"Emmett!" I growled as I marched right up to him. He glanced at me, looking very much like the little boy whose hand got caught in the cookie jar.

"Alice, really, I'm sorry. I never dreamed she would have scared as badly or as easily as she did. If I had known I wouldn't have done it. I swear I will never do that again. Well, at least not while she's human," he said holding up his hands in surrender and giving me his best impression of sad puppy-dog eyes.

I was not amused. "Emmett Cullen, don't _even_ try giving me the sad puppy-dog eyes! It may work on Rosalie and sometimes Esme, but not on me! You better believe you won't be doing that again. I mean it; I am putting my foot down. _YOU LEAVE BELLA ALONE!_ I swore to Charlie I would be bringing her back safe and in one piece. No more sneaking up behind her and startling her. No screaming "boo" or anything else to scare her. No jumping out of bushes or shrubs or doorways or anything else. No pulling rugs or chairs out from under her, or doing anything to trip her up. No making her eat or drink anything that might make her sick or drunk. I swear, Emmett Cullen, if you ruin my weekend with Bella THERE WILL BE HELL TO PAY!"

Rosalie looked up from under the Jeep. She'd witnessed the earlier scene and my threats against her husband just now. She raised one eyebrow, but wisely kept her mouth shut. Rosalie is fearless but she knows I'm not one to cross when angry and she could see I wasn't in the mood for any smart remarks. I could tell she was remembering the time I threatened to chop off her hair the one and only time she ever tried crossing me when I was angry.

Emmett looked as if he was going to laugh, but one look into my cold, hard eyes sobered him up quickly.

I turned on my heel and started walking out of the garage. Just as I reached the door, I turned around and said to him, "You'd better watch yourself, Emmett. I _WILL_ be watching you; don't even think of trying to pull one over on me again. Remember, you cross me and you will pay…" and with one last, threatening look I went back inside the house to wait for Bella to wake up from her nap.

**Emmett's POV**

I considered myself lucky to be in one piece after Alice left the garage. She might be tiny, but that sister of mine is still scary. I had no doubt she would make good on her threat.

Rosalie was watching me as I considered Alice's warning.

"You'd better watch it, Emmett," said Rosalie. "When it comes to Bella's safety, you know Alice is almost as bad as Edward."

"I know, Rosie, I know," I said to her. "I just wanted to have a little fun. How was I supposed to know she was going to stop breathing like that? These humans are so unpredictable! I can't wait for Edward to change her."

"Well, just be careful," Rosalie advised. "Alice was pretty specific about what you can't do and it would be wise not to cross her." I love how she looks out for me.

"Okay, I'm going inside to clean up," she said as she made her way out of the garage and back to the house.

I sat down on the bench thinking over what Alice had said. Man, talk about spoiling my fun. I'd had it all planned out and then Alice has to go and take away all my fun! Sometimes her ability to see the future is a real pain in the…well, you know where!

_Okay, Emmett, you've been warned, _I said to myself. _There goes the weekend. So much for having fun! I should have gone hunting with the guys. _

Alice's words came back to me:

"_No more sneaking up behind her and startling her. No screaming "boo" or anything else to scare her. No jumping out of bushes or shrubs or doorways or anything else. No pulling rugs or chairs out from under her, or doing anything to trip her up. No making her eat or drink anything that might make her sick or drunk."_

I sat there another couple of minutes, turning her words over in my head. Then it hit me. A loophole… Oh, man, I am a genius! _I can't do anything she specifically mentioned, but what about anything she __didn't__ mention?_

_I AM THE MAN! I AM THE MAN! I AM THE MAN! _I chanted as I did a victory dance. Ha! That little pixie thinks she can put me in my place. Thinks she's smarter than me because she can see the future. _I WILL be watching you, Emmett, _I mimicked in her voice.

I had a huge number of pranks in my repertoire. I could still have my fun and technically not cross Alice!

_I've gotta be careful_, I thought to myself. _Don't want to tip her off until the very last second_.

Who's smarter than whom now? Emmett Cullen, King of Pranks, is back in business!

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A/N: I want to thank the three readers who have left a review on this story. I can't tell you enough how much I appreciate it. However, I'm not sure if I'm going to continue the story. To date I've had almost a hundred visitors to my story but only three have left reviews. A large number of you have placed my story on alert so I'm fairly confident that you like what you're reading. Please, it literally takes no more than a minute, two minutes maximum, to leave a review, even if it's only three words like "I like it" or "More chapters please."

This chapter is for my mom, another **Rosie**!


	7. Emmett Strikes Back!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

A/N: I want to thank everyone for the very nice reviews. Keep them coming; you're my inspiration to keep going with the story! Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. This is dedicated to my sister, Chris, because…well, just because!

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**Chapter Seven: Emmett Strikes Back!**

**Emmett's POV**

_Heh, heh, heh, _I laughed to myself as I set my plans in motion. _Oops! Gotta keep that on the QT_, I reminded myself. _Can't have Alice knowing just yet._

I purposefully kept my mind blank as I walked back into the house. Bella was taking a nap in Edward's room and Alice was nowhere in sight. _Probably in her room, _I thought as I made my way up the stairs. At that moment Alice walked out of her room. Her eyes narrowed as she started walking towards me while mouthing "I'll be watching you," as she poked me in the chest. I gave her my best innocent look, shrugging my shoulders and saying, "What???" I watched as her eyes got that faraway look when she's looking into the future. She was checking to see if I was going to do any of those things she had "forbidden" me to do. She was killing me here; it's _really_ hard trying to fake out the pixie but I did my best to think about anything that would throw her off: taking the Jeep for a spin, me and Rosalie hunting later this evening, watching the game on the big screen TV.

Her eyes came back into focus; it would seem that none of her visions showed me doing any of the things on her "forbidden" list. But I knew she still didn't trust me, because she brushed past me and gave a low and threatening growl as she continued down the stairs. It was times like this I was _really_ glad she couldn't read minds like Edward.

Whew! Breathing a sigh of relief I made my way to my room and sat on the bed. I needed a lucky break, something that would get Alice out of the way long enough for me to set up my prank, and hopefully watch it play out before the fireworks started. Bingo! I heard Alice talking with Esme in the kitchen, telling her she needed to run an errand and would be back in half an hour. Am I the luckiest vampire on this planet? _YES! _I said to myself as I did the grown man version of that 'Home Alone' kid's move, the one where he gets down on one knee and pumps his arm up and down while yelling "YES!" Yup, I am one lucky vampire…

I went to the window and waited until I heard the sound of Alice's car starting, watching as she pulled out of the garage and made her way down the drive.

Once I was sure she was gone, I used my vampire stealth to sneak up to Edward's room, very quietly opening the door and peeking in to see if Bella was still asleep. She was out cold. _He, he, he, _I chuckled to myself as I made my way over to the bed. She was breathing deeply and then started mumbling in her sleep. I had a hard time not laughing when I heard her mutter "stupid overgrown vampire" – clearly a reference to me. I puffed out my chest proudly, thinking _God, she is funny!_

I had a moment's panic when I heard Esme making her way up the stairs but then I heard her bedroom door close and knew I was safe. For a moment I thought she was going to peek in on Bella and that would have ruined my plan.

I quietly opened the door and once I was sure the coast was clear, I snuck down to the kitchen to grab the necessary ingredient for my second prank. Opening the refrigerator I searched for the can of whipped cream that Esme kept on hand for Bella. Bella loves strawberries and cream so Esme makes it a point to keep a can in the refrigerator for her. _Ah, there it is! _Perfect. Very quietly I snuck back to Edward's room, shaking the can as I made my way up the stairs. Peeking through the doorway I saw Bella hadn't moved. _Good, still asleep. _I carefully removed the cap from the can of whipped cream and placed a golf-ball sized portion of the cream in her right hand. When Bella wakes from her nap the first thing she's going to do is rub her face…smearing the cream all over her face! _Man, this is gonna be good! _I said to myself, trying not to laugh.

Bella's hand suddenly twitched, but other than that she stayed perfectly still, still sound asleep. I did the same to her left hand and leaned back to survey my handiwork. _Nah, Emmett, we need something more, something really funny, _I thought to myself. _Got it! _I very carefully drew a moustache and goatee on her face, and around her hairline I made the outlines for one of those wigs they make those barristers in England wear, the same type of wig George Washington wore when he was President. I quietly made my way to the door, looking back one last time to admire my work before closing the door.

Now, I knew Bella was not going to be happy waking up with whipped cream all over her face, hands and hair. What kind of big brother would I be if I didn't have a solution for that problem? Of course, my solution was guaranteed to be fun…well… fun for me!

I grabbed the box of balloons we keep in the hall closet for those occasions when Jasper, Edward and I feel the need to pelt each other with water balloons. I filled three huge balloons full of cold water and carefully hung them above Edward's doorway. I rigged my trap by attaching a clear piece of string to the balloons and weaving the line down the side of the doorway and then cutting directly across the door at the midway point. When Bella opens the door she'll run into the string and…SPLAT! The balloons would drop down on her and presto! No more whipped cream! Of course she'll be soaking wet, but you can't argue with the results right?

So far, so good. I made my way to the end of the hallway and hid myself as I waited for the fun to begin.

**Alice's POV**

I was worried about leaving the house, even for a short period of time, but there was an errand I needed to take care of and since Bella was napping I decided to go ahead and get it over with. I did _not_ trust Emmett one bit, so when I passed him in the hall I reminded him of my promise to watch him, complete with threatening growl thrown in for good measure.

Next, I went to the kitchen to let Esme know I'd be back shortly and rushed to the garage. Esme said she would listen out for Bella.

I jumped into my beautiful yellow Porsche and backed out of the garage, racing down the drive. I wanted to get back as quickly as possible. I had so many fun things planned for Bella and me and once she woke from her nap we could get started.

I had just arrived at my destination when I got this funny feeling, like something bad was going to happen. This funny feeling had Emmett's name written ALL over it. _There __is no way Emmett could be so stupid as to try pranking Bella again, not after my specific warning about what he couldn't do, _I thought to myself, yet that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach gave me my answer. _Oh no! He is that stupid! __T__hat overgrown gorilla is going to do whatever I __didn't__ forbid him to do!!!_ I let out a snarl as I looked ahead to the future and saw I was right. A chain of events was about to be set in motion, causing me to scream **"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" **Jumping back into my Porsche, I raced back to the house, knowing I was going to be too late…

**Emmett's POV**

I was killing time waiting for Bella to wake, quietly humming movie theme songs. Right now 'Mission Impossible' was playing in my head: _Dum-dum, Dum-dum-dum-dum, Dum-dum …Dadadum! Dadadum! _This was definitely a 'mission impossible,' trying to fool Alice, but here I was minutes away from success!

I could hear Bella's breathing change as she started to wake up. I poked my head around the corner, getting ready for the fun to begin. It didn't take long. There was a loud scream followed by a roar as Bella jumped out of the bed and tripped her way to the door, calling me every name under the sun and yelling, "Emmett Cullen, I am going to KILL you! I don't care if you're a vampire and indestructible; I am going to make you wish you had never been made immortal!!!"

I was laughing so hard, clutching my sides…_oh man, this is good! _

Esme heard Bella's scream and raced to her bedroom door. Before Esme had even stepped over the threshold, the door to Edward's bedroom door was flung open and I got my first look at Bella's face. _SHE WAS ANGRY! _The George Washington wig was still in place, but the moustache and goatee had turned into a white beard and with her red cheeks she looked like Santa Claus!

Just when I thought it couldn't get any funnier, she stepped forward, right into the trip wire, causing the water balloons to come crashing down on her. SPLAT! SPLAT! SPLAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One by one the balloons dropped on her head and burst upon impact, drenching her in cold water and eliciting another scream of anger. Talk about looking like a drowned kitten; she was soaked!

Oh man! I should have set up a video camera! This was worth a good 10 to 20 years of blackmail material!

Rosalie also heard Bella's scream and had rushed out of our bedroom. Her lips were twitching at the sight of Bella completely soaked, before giving me a look that said, _"You know you're dead, Emmett, don't you? What did I say earlier about crossing Alice?" __Oh come on, Rosie, don't turn on me now! _I thought to myself.

Bella had a wild look on her face as she scanned the hall, her eyes narrowing when she caught sight of me peeking from around the corner and laughing at her like there was no tomorrow. She turned a darker shade of red as she started stalking towards me, looking like an angry, soaking wet kitten. I swear, if she were a cat her back would be arched, hair and tail standing on end. The image made me laugh even more. I held my hands up and slowly started backing down the stairs, thinking it would be best to put some distance between the two of us.

"Bella…it was just a joke. I couldn't resist and you didn't get hurt this time. You should have seen your face when you opened the door!" I said, hoping that her sense of humor would rise to the occasion. No such luck… _She's been hanging around Mr. Emo too long, _I said to myself_. _

Bella was not amused, nor was Esme as she started towards Bella.

"Oh, come on you two! You have to admit it was funny," I said, trying to get them to see it my way. Rosalie shook her head at me as she tried to keep her face straight. Okay, I was on my own here.

"No Emmett, it's not funny when the human wakes up to whipped cream on her face, hands and hair, and then gets water bombed when she opens the door!" yelled Bella. Wow, she was red AND purple now!

Now, when one lives with Carlisle, Edward and Jasper for half a century there are numerous occasions when you find yourself the recipient of little "pearls" of wisdom and it would probably surprise them to know that I actually remember some of these "pearls." One quote in particular came to mind. Jasper enjoys British history and had read a book of quotes by some guy named Benjamin Disraeli. _I think he was like a prime minister or something, _I thought to myself_._ There was one quote that happens to be a favorite of Jasper's, one that he's repeated to me many, many times; so many times I had it committed to memory: _"What we anticipate seldom occurs; but what we least expect generally happens."_

Why, oh why, didn't I remember this quote because I swear it has Bella written all over it! Not only is she a danger magnet, you can add "accident magnet" to her list of titles, because if it involves Bella, "what we least expect generally happens."

The water balloons had created a huge puddle that zigzagged down the hallway towards the top of the stairs. Bella being Bella, with nothing but a level floor and no obstacles in her path, tripped over her two feet and slipped at the top of the stairs, her feet coming out from under her as she landed hard on her behind and slid down one…two…three steps before coming to a stop.

At the very same moment the front door burst open and a very angry Alice ran up the stairs towards Bella. "EMMETT CULLEN!" she screamed. _Not good…_

Esme and I were immobile from shock for about a split second before quickly recovering and racing to where Bella lay sprawled on the stairs. She was moaning, her arms flung over her face.

Alice and Esme were furious, but right now their only concern was for Bella. "Sweetheart, don't move!" said Esme. "You need to tell me where it hurts. Can you move at all? Can you feel your legs?"

"I think I broke my bum…" she sobbed as she tried to ease the pressure off her backside.

As funny as it sounded to hear Bella say her "bum" was broken, I wasn't laughing. I was scared she might have hurt herself badly. I had thought my joke would be harmless, only good for laughs, but once again the unexpected happened with Bella.

"Bella, you need to stay still," said Alice. She looked at Esme and said, "Esme, please call Carlisle and see what we should do." Alice gave me a dark look as she said in a low whisper meant for me alone, "I will deal with you later, Emmett Cullen!" I cringed as I imagined what she was going to do to me. _Oh man, in the doghouse again! _I thought to myself. She was angrier than I had ever seen her in the years I'd known her and I could only hope she would buy my excuses and let me off on a technicality.

Bella just lay there on the stairs continuing to moan, while Alice tried to keep her from moving.

"Oh Bella, I'm so sorry I wasn't here. I didn't see it. _Someone_," Alice said as she glared at me again, "was able to keep his plans from me, again! I don't know how he did it. I was only going to be gone for half an hour and you were sound asleep. I thought it would be safe to leave while you were napping!"

Bella raised her arms from her face to look at Alice, trying to make a smile out of the grimace on her face. "It's okay Alice. I was asleep and there shouldn't have been anything to be worried about." She turned her head to glare at me. I hung my head. Boy, it sucks being on Bella's bad side...

"I'm sorry, Bella. It was supposed to be funny, you weren't supposed to get hurt," I repeated again. Bella just turned her head away, stretching her arm out with her hand open, palm side facing me, the universal sign of "Talk to the hand." _Ouch! Definitely on her bad side!_

Alice smirked at me as she said to Bella, "Well, I'm sorry. Esme's gone to call Carlisle. It looks as though you're going to have a sore bum, but we want to run it by Carlisle first, to make sure there isn't anything we shouldn't be doing."

"Call Carlisle?" asked Bella with a panicked look on her face. "Alice, really, it's not that bad. You don't need to call him. I can move everything; I'm just a little sore right now but I'll be alright."

Alice glanced down at Bella and replied, "We just want to make sure, Bella, it's no big deal."

Bella started going into full panic mode. "Alice, you can't do that! Edward will find out! You know how he gets. If he finds out I'm hurt he's going to want to come back home immediately and he needs to hunt! He can't know! Please, please don't let him find out!"

"Bella, I don't know if we can keep something like this from him. You could still be hurt and Carlisle will have to let him know." Alice said doubtfully, her brows drawn together as she tried to see ahead.

"Really, Alice, I'm just sore. Please! Tell Carlisle to let Edward know it's one of my usual trip and fall accidents; he doesn't need to give Edward specifics!" Bella said quickly. She really didn't want to tell him what had happened, a decision that I was whole-heartedly agreeing with right now.

"I don't know, Bella," said Alice as she continued to shake her doubtfully, but then seeing how truly panicked Bella was she slowly nodded her head. "Okay, we'll just tell him you tripped but are fine. Edward won't like it, but he'll buy it because he knows how accident-prone you are."

Bella looked relieved at this. I'm sure I looked more relieved than she did.

"But…" Alice continued. "We wait to hear what Carlisle says first..."

Bella nodded in agreement as she put her arms back over her face and waited for Esme to finish talking to Carlisle.

**Esme's POV**

I walked a short distance away and pulled out my cell phone to call Carlisle. I could not believe Emmett had pulled another stunt! _What is wrong with him? Was he dropped on his head at birth? _I asked myself. _Wasn't Alice's warning enough? Is he trying to scare Bella away? _I growled inside as I considered this last thought. _Ooh, if he messes this up for Edward, Alice will have to take a position behind me in the "Who Gets To Send Emmett to His Maker" line!_

I sighed as I placed the call. Carlisle picked up on the first ring. I spoke before he had a chance to say a word.

"Carlisle, is Edward nearby?" were the first words to come out of my mouth. Carlisle very quickly caught on that this phone call was about Bella.

"No, he's off with Jasper right now. I'm supposed to meet up with the two in a couple of hours."

I was quiet on the other end of the phone, trying to think of how to word this.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong? When you call and ask if Edward is nearby, it means you don't want to him to hear, and if you don't want him to hear then it means it's about Bella, or more specifically, about Bella being hurt. Am I right?" Carlisle asked quietly.

My love knows me so well. I sighed into the phone and replied, "Yes, it is about Bella and I don't want Edward hearing just now. Before you get too worried, she's fine, or at least we think she is, but we wanted to run it by you first to make sure."

I proceeded to tell him everything that had happened, ending with Bella sprawled on her back on the stairs.

I could hear Carlisle sigh into the phone. In my mind's eye I could picture his expression. He loves all his children, but sometimes Emmett sorely tried his patience.

After I finished relating the events, Carlisle replied, "It doesn't sound like she injured herself too badly, other than having a sore backside from how she landed. Go ahead and lift her carefully. She'll be sore. Sit her on the couch downstairs. Start off with an ice pack on the bruised area for about 30 minutes every 3 to 4 hours; it should help with any pain or soreness. You can also give her some pain relievers and have her use a pillow when sitting. She should be okay in a day or two."

"Bella asked if you could keep the specifics from Edward. She says he needs to hunt and she doesn't want him to overreact and cut the trip short," I said. "She asks you to tell him it was just one of her usual trip and fall accidents, nothing to be concerned about. No blood spilled." I laughed weakly.

Carlisle chuckled. "Bella, Bella, always thinking of others instead of herself. Tell her I'll do as she asks, but if the pain gets worse you are to call me _immediately _and I'll have to let Edward know. We _will_ cut the trip short."

"Okay, my love, I'll do that." I said. "I miss you already. Come back to me soon?"

"Soon, sweetheart, very soon," Carlisle lovingly replied as he ended the call.

I walked back towards the others and relayed Carlisle's message. Alice, who didn't want Emmett anywhere near Bella, gently picked her up and took her downstairs to start the ice packs.

**Emmett's POV**

This whole weekend of having fun pranking Bella was not going like I'd planned. I wanted some laughs at my favorite human's expense, but I didn't want to see her hurt and that's how both my pranks had ended.

_Well, Emmett old boy, I think we're going to have to close shop on the pranks until my little sister is one of us. You can't guarantee the pranks are going to end up the way they're meant to, considering this is Bella and the unexpected always happens with her. I want her in one piece and I don't want Esme or either of my sisters mad at me anymore. Alright, Emmett Cullen, King of Pranks, is temporarily abdicating his throne… _

I sighed as I walked out of the house and across the lawn. I decided it would be a good idea to be out of Alice's line of sight (and line of fire), at least for a little while. She would be looking for me soon enough; I should enjoy what time I have left on this earth…

Oops, spoke too soon!

**Alice's POV**

"Oh, Emmett," I said in a sweet voice. "A word please?"

And without waiting for him to reply I grabbed him by the ear and started running vampire speed through the forest, dragging him along for the ride…

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A/N: Like it? What did you think? It's almost time for Emmett to get his come-uppance. The next chapter is going to be about how Bella ends up in the emergency room. Click the green button below and let me know how much you want the next chapter! :-D


	8. Going to the Mattresses

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

A/N: Okay everyone, I know I said that this chapter would be about how Bella ended up the emergency room but then I realized that Alice hadn't made good on her threat to Emmett! Enjoy!

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**Chapter Eight: Going to the Mattresses**

**Rosalie's POV**

I was looking out the window and watched as Emmett walked across the lawn, obviously trying to stay out of Alice's way. Suddenly there was a look of surprise on his face as a tiny black-haired blur flew past, dragging my husband along with her. I let out a small sigh. _Oh Emmett, didn't I warn you? You'd better pray Alice goes easy on you, or at the very least let's you keep your hair! _I was thinking of her previous threats to my own hair. I had no idea what Alice had planned for my husband. I knew he wasn't in any real danger, but it wasn't going to be pretty.

Then I did what any concerned wife would do when her husband is caught in a trap of his own making after having ignored sound wifely advice.

I laughed my ass off…

**Esme's POV**

Alice had gone outside to speak with Emmett. I was worried about what she might do to him. Before I could think any more on it I heard Rosalie laughing somewhere in the house. She sounded like a little girl without a care in the world. I smiled to myself. Emmett must be fine; she wouldn't be laughing like that if he were in danger…

**Alice's POV**

Now, I consider myself a rational creature. I never fly off the handle; I always get the facts before taking any sort of action. I don't roughhouse or wrestle with my brothers. I don't get into cat-fights with other females, vampire or human, not even those human cutthroat fashionista wannabes who mistakenly think they can outbid or out-grab me for the latest fashion find! I'm a lady, I'm above all of that…or so I thought.

The time had come for me, Alice Cullen, the epitome of all that is graceful, ladylike and fashionable, to do as they say in the 'The Godfather' movie: _we were going to the mattresses! _The white gloves were coming off! Emmett is going to learn why it's a mistake to mess with the little pixie! Yes, this was definitely war, plain and simple, and I intended to come out the victor in this match!

I found Emmett in the backyard. It was obvious he was trying to avoid me. Too bad. "Oh, Emmett," I said sweetly, "A word please?"

Without waiting for him to reply I grabbed him by the ear and started running vampire speed through the forest, dragging him along for the ride…

I made my way to a small clearing not far away. I'm sure it was quite funny, a tiny 4'9 inch female dragging a 6'4 male by the ear, making sure he hit every bush, tree, and boulder along the way. I knew it wouldn't hurt him; I just liked the idea of making him run into everything! I'm sure if I were watching the scene from a distance I would be laughing.

I came to a sudden stop and Emmett winced as I twisted his ear. "Alice!" he shouted, "Let me go! I can explain!"

"Oh no, Emmett, I'm done with your explanations!" I calmly said to him. He tried wiggling his way out of my grasp. "Having a problem, dear brother?" I shook my head as if sad. "Tsk, tsk, tsk. You seem to have forgotten your sister has a gift for seeing the future. And it sure does come in handy at a time like this! I've already seen each and every single move you're going to make and I can promise you I will counter each and every one of those moves. So, why don't you just let me get on with it, okay?" I said in a sickly sweet voice.

Emmett grimaced as he resigned himself to facing the music like a man…er…vampire.

I kept my steel-like grip on his ear as I used my other hand to pull his arm behind his back. _Oh Jazz, it's times like this when I am so thankful you were a military man. All those hand-to-hand combat lessons, sweetheart, and I get to practice them all on your brother! I wish you were here to see, _I said to myself before getting back to the job at hand.

"Didn't I warn you, Emmett?" I hissed into his other ear. "Did I not tell you to _LEAVE BELLA ALONE?_" And with that I flung him by the ear into the nearest tree. There was a loud crack as the tree snapped in half. Emmett was on the ground face down and before he had a chance to move I was on him again, digging my knee into his back while locking his hands behind his head and pushing his face into the muddy ground.

I leaned towards his head and hissed once again into his ear. "You thought you could be smarter than me, didn't you? You thought you could outwit me. _I can pull one over on Alice; I just won't make any decisions until the last moment_."

With that I pulled him up from the ground and sent him flying through the air towards a giant boulder 100 feet away. CRACK!

Still not done and still faster than Emmett could move I once again pinned him face down on the ground, bending his leg up towards his back and pinning both hands behind his head.

I applied a little vampire pressure to his head before turning his face to the left so he could see me. "Emmett, my dear brother. If you want to make it out of this forest in one piece you are going to repeat the following sentences after me, do you understand?"

Emmett's looked at me from the corner of his eye, sighed deeply and nodded, waiting for me to continue.

"Repeat after me," I said. "I, Emmett Cullen..."

Emmett's muffled voice repeated, "I, Emmett Cullen…"

**Me: **"Being obviously **not** of sound mind and with questionable intelligence…"

**Emmett: **"Being obviously **not** of sound mind and with questionable intelligence…"

**Me: **"And hoping to not lose an important body part my wife would miss…"

Emmett winced at the implication and then repeated, "And hoping to not lose an important body part my wife would miss…"

**Me: **"Including the possibility of permanent hair removal, any hair, anywhere on my body…"

**Emmett: **"Including the possibility of permanent hair removal, any hair, anywhere on my body…"

**Me: **"Under threat of serious damages to my prized Jeep if I disobey…"

**Emmett: **"Under threat of serious damages done to my prized Jeep if I disobey…"

**Me: **"As well as being forced to eat human food, Bella's choice, for one full week…"

**Emmett: **"As well as being forced to human food, Bella's choice, for one full week…"

**Me: **"And swearing to become Alice's newest shopping buddy, i.e. whipping boy, for ONE YEAR if I break my oath…"

**Emmett: **"And swearing to become Alice's newest shopping buddy, i.e. whipping boy, for ONE YEAR if I break my oath…"

**Me: **"Do solemnly swear to leave my soon-to-be sister Bella alone, including no more pranks at her expense…"

**Emmett: **"Do solemnly swear to leave my soon-to-be sister Bella alone, including no more pranks at her expense…"

**Me: **"Until she has been changed and no longer needs the oath to protect her…"

**Emmett: **"Until she has been changed and no longer needs the oath to protect her…"

**Me: **"At which time she will be perfectly capable of KICKING MY ASS on her own!"

**Emmett: **"At which time she will be perfectly capable of KICKING MY ASS on her own!"

**Me: **"This is my solemn promise and vow…"

**Emmett: **"This is my solemn promise and vow…"

I released Emmett and stood up. "You see big brother, that wasn't so painful, was it? You just make sure you keep your promise and all will be good. And just so you can't claim ignorance or suddenly lose your "vampire memory," I've recorded our conversation on this lovely little digital recorder hanging from the chain around my neck. Of course, this recording will be played at our next family meeting, which I will be calling for in the very near future, after which it will be taken to a secret and safe location, ready to be retrieved should you need a little "reminder."

I was grinning by this time. "Don't think you're completely off the hook, Emmett. I'm going to be watching you very closely from here on out."

I walked a few feet away before turning back to face Emmett. "That concludes your lesson in…" I said each word slowly for effect, "…'Reasons. Why. I. Should. Never. Ever. Cross. Alice.' See you later, Emmett!"

Waving goodbye I raced back to the house, laughing the whole way as I anticipated replaying the whole conversation for Bella and Esme.

**Emmett's POV**

I watched Alice run back to the house, leaving me standing there in a daze and thinking how lucky I was to still be among the living…er…the existing…and in one piece! Another pearl of wisdom from Jasper came to mind: _'It's said that just before you die your whole life flashes before you.' _I can say without a doubt it can also happen to those of us who are already dead!

I needed to sit down. If it were possible I'd be sweating bullets right now. _Did that just happen? _I thought. _Did I just get handed a can of whoop-ass by my sister? By a female???_ I was starting to feel sick as it sunk in. The feeling got worse when I realized she was going to make sure Jasper and Edward knew I'd been taken down.

I groaned, putting my head in my hands. My vampire life as I knew it was gone. My sister owned me now…

I got up and started back to the house, head hanging down and doing what any grown man does when he's beaten by a girl: I started sobbing like a baby.

**Bella's POV**

I was sitting on the couch, pillow tucked carefully under my bum along with the ice pack. _What I wouldn't give for Edward to be here right now, serving as my own personal ice pack! _That thought brought a smile to my face.

Somewhere in the house I heard Rosalie laughing. _Wow, I've never heard her laugh like that, _I thought. _She sounds so happy. Emmett must have done something funny._

Emmett. My good mood suddenly disappeared. What is wrong with him? It was like I had a huge bulls-eye on my back that screamed, "Get Bella! Get Bella!" Better yet, like I'm a Spanish matador holding a red cape and Emmett is the bull ready to charge. I was starting to have some serious doubts about spending the weekend at the Cullens'. I found myself longing to play Bella Barbie for Alice; it would have been less painful! I can't believe I'm thinking that way!

_**I **_was supposed to be here to relax so that _**Edward **_could relax while he went hunting with Carlisle and Jasper, knowing Alice would keep me safe. Too bad we didn't factor Emmett into the equation. Maybe I should suggest to Alice we take this to my place? No, that might hurt Esme's feelings and I've missed visiting with her. _I'll just have to suck it up, _I said to myself. _But I can't wait until I'm a newborn. Emmett, revenge will be sweet!_

I heard Alice's tinkling laugh as she ran into the room.

"Hey," I said. "What's so funny?"

**Alice's POV**

I sat down next to Bella on the couch, with Esme nearby. Rosalie had also come into the room and was standing near the window, probably waiting to see if her husband would be coming back with a full head of hair! I snickered at that thought and then started to tell the girls about the scene in the clearing. Better yet, I proceeded to _replay_ the entire conversation with Emmett, with the help of my wonderful little digital recorder.

We laughed, and laughed, and laughed.

**Emmett's POV**

I was nearing the house when I heard the laughter. _Oh man, Alice spilled! They're laughing at ME! _

I decided to head towards the garage instead.

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A/N: Next up, how Bella ends up in the emergency room. But first, please click the button below and leave me a review. Thanks! :-D


	9. Someone Call 911

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Nine: Someone Call 911…**

**Alice's POV**

The rest of the evening passed uneventfully. Emmett had come back inside the house looking properly chastened. He immediately walked over to the couch, again making his apologies to Bella. Bella had thoroughly enjoyed my little digital recording and felt Emmett had gotten his just desserts, so she accepted his apology…again.

After watching Bella yawn for the tenth time in the last 15 minutes, we decided it was time to get her to bed. The ice had seemed to do the trick but I decided to carry her up the stairs to Edward's bedroom and got her settled in for the night.

I went back downstairs to chat with Esme while we waited for morning to come and Bella to wake up. I was excited! Finally, Bella and I could start having fun.

**Bella's POV**

Sunlight was streaming through the glass windows and I woke up feeling pretty good despite yesterday's events and the fact Edward was not here to wake me up. I had high hopes that today would be the peaceful, relaxing and fun-filled day promised to me by my best friend, and so I gingerly sat up, testing my mobility. My 'broken bum' didn't hurt as much today. I said a little "Yes!" before making my way to the bathroom for my 'human moment.'

After a delicious strawberry waffle breakfast prepared by Esme (no whipped cream in sight, thanks to Emmett!), Alice and I headed up to her "parlor" to get started on our 'girl fun.' I had to admit it was relaxing. I was having a great time. While we waited for our nails to dry we talked about the wedding, about our men, about Alice's smack-down of Emmett. It had been a long time since I'd laughed so much and it felt good!

It was about 11:00 in the morning and we'd been holed up in Alice's room for about 3 hours. My newly healed bottom had decided it had had enough sitting down, so Alice and I decided that a nice long walk would help loosen me up. I was wearing capris today, and threw on a long-sleeved sweater and some comfy sneakers and headed outside with Alice to take a hike alongside the river. Esme had packed a light lunch for me so that I could enjoy a nice picnic. Alice made sure I stayed clear of any rocks and didn't wander too close to the river. We weren't going to push my luck today; she didn't want to take any chances and for once I wasn't complaining. I wanted to get through the day in one piece too.

Things were going good, too good, in fact. I should have known it wouldn't last.

**Alice's POV**

Bella and I were having so much fun! Not once had she complained about anything this morning. Unbelievable! Even if I had looked ahead and seen how well the morning would go, I still wouldn't have believed it!

We talked non-stop all morning, chatting about everything and everyone, laughing easily. I was so happy to see Bella finally looking relaxed. Esme was happy as well. She had popped in a couple of times to chat with us as we waiting for our fingernails to dry, and was pleased to find Bella in good spirits this morning.

I noticed Bella shift to her side and asked if everything was okay. "Bella, are you still hurting? Do you need another ice pack?" I asked solicitously.

Bella grimaced before answering, "I'm fine, Alice. But I think I've been sitting for too long in the same position and my bottom is starting to get a little sore again. It might help if I stand and stretch my muscles and maybe walk around for a bit. Some fresh air might be nice as well. Maybe we can take a walk outside?" she suggested.

I agreed right away. "That's a great idea! How about a little hike along the river? Nothing strenuous and we'll just take our time. In fact, Esme can pack a lunch and you can have a little picnic before we head back. It's early and we still have most of the afternoon for our facials and pedicures before heading to Port Angeles."

Bella surprised me again by readily agreeing to the plan. Will miracles never cease?

We headed out on our hike, Esme's picnic lunch in hand, and made our way along the banks of the river. It was a beautiful day. The skies were clear and Bella was enjoying the warmth of the sun as much as I was. She kept looking over at me and smiling as I sparkled. It was wonderful not worrying about Bella seeing us in the sun. She loved how our skin sparkled, saying it was beautiful. Another reason why we loved her so much…

We crossed to the other side of the river towards a small meadow visible through the trees, picking a spot where Bella could eat her lunch. The day was going well, too well. I had that funny feeling again. Closing my eyes I looked into the future…and in my vision I saw Emmett walking towards us by the river. And then…

**Emmett's POV**

I thought it best to stay away from the house for most of the morning. I was determined to be on my best behavior, tired of being on the bad side of the Cullen females, human and vampire! I went for a run in the forest, not making my way back until the sun was high in the sky.

I decided to come back by way of the river. It was a nice day. The sun was shining but there were no humans around to see me sparkle so I took my time walking back. I heard voices in the distance and quickly hid behind the nearest tree, but as the voices drew closer I recognized it was Alice and Bella. _What are they doing out here? _I said to myself. _I thought they were going to stick around the house and then head out to Port Angeles._ I didn't want to take the longer route back to the house so I stepped out from behind the tree and made my way over to the girls. _Just be cool, Emmett, show them you're on your best behavior. _

"Alice! Bella! What are you two doing out here?" I said as I came up to the girls. Alice and Bella looked at me suspiciously, trying to see if I was up to no good. I held my hands up in surrender. "Come on girls, I come in peace. Trust me. I was out running in the forest this morning and was on my way back to the house. I didn't expect to see the two of you out here. I just want to get back to the house and Rosalie."

Alice and Bella looked at me carefully, as if judging my sincerity.

I sighed and said, "What happened to the days of 'Emmett, we would trust you with our lives,' or 'Nice to see you again big brother.' Come on, I promise, I am on my best behavior."

Bella was the first to respond, sarcastically I might add. "Oh, I'm SO sorry Emmett. You'll have to forgive me for being a little suspicious when you start saying 'I'm on my best behavior.' If only I had a buck for every time you've said that to me this weekend, I'd be on my way to being a rich woman!"

Alice added, sarcastically as well and fluttering her eyelids. _She was mocking me!_ "Yes, Emmett, forgive us if we find it hard to believe your intentions are innocent. It's going to take more than 'I'm sorry' and 'I'm on my best behavior' to make us trust you!"

Bella nodded her head vigorously at that.

"Okay, okay, I'll prove it to you." I said. "I'll walk back to the house with you and you'll see nothing bad is gonna happen. We'll arrive in one piece and not one prank will be played on Bella. Cross my undead heart! Please, will you let me walk back with you?"

Alice gave me another hard look before slowly nodding her head. "Okay, Emmett. If Bella agrees, you can accompany us back to the house. But you'd better keep your word: back in one piece and no pranks!"

I clapped my hands, happy to be on my way back into their good graces. "Yes!"

Bella still looked unsure, but she seemed determined to let it go because she nodded her head again and said to both Alice and me, "Okay, I agree. Let's go back."

With that we turned and started slowly walking back to the house.

**Bella's POV**

I don't know why I agreed to let Emmett walk back with us. I suppose I was just determined to let it go, let bygones be bygones. And he had promised (again) that he was going to behave himself so I let it go. But why were my "Spidey-senses" tingling again? I had this awful feeling something bad was going to happen…

**Alice's POV**

I could see the worry on Bella's face but she looked determined to let it go and we started walking back to the house with Emmett in tow. We started talking about non-consequential things and the banter was flowing back and forth between the three of us. I kept looking ahead to the future to see if anything was out of place, but all looked well. I was afraid there would be a split second decision on Emmett's or Bella's part before all hell broke loose again. _Oh please, please let us make it back with no problems._

Bella was starting to get tired. Maybe we had done a little too much walking, as I watched her gingerly start to rub her backside again. We were still a long way from the house. _Maybe she'll let me carry her back…_

**Emmett's POV**

Things were going really well. We were laughing and joking and everything seemed to be going back to normal. I was feeling a lot better. It wasn't fun being in the doghouse with those two. It was nothing in comparison to being in the doghouse with Rosalie, but I'd say it was a close second.

Looking over at Bella I noticed she looked uncomfortable. She was rubbing her backside again and we were still a distance from the house. I could see Alice glancing at Bella as well.

It looked like Bella was going to need some assistance getting back to the house and big brother Emmett was here to save the day! _Great! _I thought to myself. _I can carry her back to the house. Bella won't have to walk. I'll have her back at the house in minutes and I'll be a hero again!_

And with that I pulled Bella onto my back, making sure she had a tight grip around my neck before racing off towards the house at top speed.

**Bella's POV**

_Oh no! Oh God, please, no!!! _"EMMETT!!!" I screamed as we went flying down the river trail.

**Alice's POV**

I was trying to think of a way to convince Bella to let me carry her back to the house when a vision suddenly appeared in my mind. A decision had been made and the events were playing themselves out before me. _Oh no!!! _I came out of the vision but before I could utter one word, Emmett was pulling Bella onto his back, wrapping her arms around his neck. I saw the look of surprise, and then absolute terror on Bella's face as Emmett took off in a flash towards the house. "EMMETT! STOP!!!" I screamed, running after the two and knowing I was going to be too late...

**Emmett's POV**

I raced down the river trail, with Bella on my back. Yes! I was going to have her back to the house in no time. _Why is she screaming? _I asked myself, slightly offended by her lack of appreciation for what I was doing for her.

I turned to look at her and saw she had squeezed her eyes shut. "Hey Bella, don't worry. Everything will be fine. I'm just going to get you back to the house quicker than if we walked at your human pace. You'll be thanking me for this later, trust me!"

Bella opened her eyes to look at me, and they suddenly went wide as she screamed, "Look out!"

I faced forward again and narrowly avoided the tree directly in our path; unfortunately I couldn't avoid the vines with the bright red and green leaves hanging around the nearby branches. They were starting to brush up against us, but I was able to push most of them out of the way. _No problemo. _It looks like a few had brushed up against Bella's arms and shoulders, leaving little scratches on her hands and neck, but fortunately there was no blood so we were good.

I made a quick turn to the left to get back onto the trail, not realizing there was a small creek hidden by the low-hanging tree branches. I landed in waist high water which was dark and muddy. _Yuck. Okay, we can handle this. Bella's going to be a little wet, but it's warm out and she'll dry off soon enough. It's all good._

Stepping out of the water I got us back onto dry land. I needed to jump over to the other side of the river and taking a great big leap I soared across the river, landing next to some small bushes which were hiding a skunk. Uh-oh! A very surprised and frightened skunk. And now it was a very angry skunk that started hissing at us and aimed its tail in our direction. _Oh man! Gotta move NOW! _I darted away but not before hearing the sound of spray coming from its tail. I could feel some of the spray hit my legs and knew Bella probably got hit as well. _Whew! What a stink! _

I heard Alice yelling in the distance, but I kept going as we were almost to the house and Bella appeared to be fine, still holding on tight. Alice would catch up and once she did we'd be back at the house, all good and all in one piece. I'm a genius. _Pat me on the back, Bella!_

We'd made it to the edge of the property with one last hurdle to get past, a small boulder which I easily cleared. _Piece of cake, _I said to myself as I landed. It was at this point Bella lost her grip and went flying, face first, into a small patch of mushrooms near one of the trees. I ran over to her immediately to make sure she was alright. She raised her head, her mouth crammed with small mushrooms that she immediately started to spit out.

I sat her up and gently patted her back as she continued spitting out the mushrooms. At that moment Alice ran up. _Damn, she does not look happy._

**Alice's POV**

"Emmett! You idiot! Stop!" I was yelling but he never slowed down. I could see him racing down the trail with Bella. I watched as he nearly hit a tree while turning back to look at her. I heard her scream, "Look out!" and he'd turned, avoiding the tree trunk but not the poison oak hanging around the low-hanging branches! I saw the vines and leaves brush against Bella's shoulders and arms as Emmett pushed them out of the way.

I was desperate to catch up to them, anxious to prevent the next thing from happening. _Oh no! Too late!_

Emmett and Bella dropped out of sight for a minute before reappearing on the trail. What I didn't see with my eyes, I had seen in my vision. Emmett had dropped down into waist-high, muddy water. Muddy water full of leeches. Leeches that loved blood. Leeches that were currently attaching themselves to the parts of Bella's bare legs not covered by the capris she was wearing. _Oh Bella, _I groaned, _you have the worst luck! _

I continued to race down the trail, hoping to catch Emmett before he made the jump across the river and into the path of the skunk. _Too late! Direct hit! _

I watched as Emmett reached the edge of the lawn and jumped over a small boulder. At this point Bella lost her grip on Emmett's neck and did a face-plant into a patch of mushrooms near the base of one of the trees. Mushrooms that were mildly toxic and could make a human sick. The very mushrooms she was spitting from her mouth…

**Bella's POV**

I was in a daze, having hit the ground hard. My mouth was filled with dirt and mushrooms which I started spitting out as fast as I could. _Ugh! I think I swallowed a few!_

Alice had finally caught up to us and told me to stay still. "Bella, I don't want you to be alarmed but I think we need to get you over to the emergency room at the hospital as soon as possible."

"What are you talking about Alice?" I said stupidly, still in a daze.

Alice looked at me sadly. "Bella, I swear you have the worst luck in the world! The vines that you and Emmett brushed up against, near that tree he almost hit? Those vines and leaves were poison oak and they brushed up against your shoulder and arms. It's a good thing you're wearing that long-sleeved sweater, but there's still a chance you may have gotten some on your exposed skin."

I groaned. _Great, just what I need, an itchy red rash. Can it get any worse? _I said to myself as my heart started to beat faster. _Wait, it's __me we're talking about…of course it can get worse!_

I listed as Alice continued. "Do you remember the waist-high water Emmett accidentally jumped into?" she asked. "Trust you to attract anything that loves blood, Bella. There are leeches on your legs."

"WHAT!?" I screamed, looking down at my legs and seeing several inch-long bloodsuckers clinging to my lower legs. I yelled, "Get them off! Get them off me now!"

"I'm sorry Bella, I can't!" Alice said miserably. "If I pull them off your legs there's a good chance you'll start bleeding. We can't take that risk."

I was starting to feel a little sick at this point, when I noticed a strange odor. A really bad odor. "WHAT is that smell?" I asked as I pinched my nose.

"Well, when Emmett jumped over the river he landed the both of you right next to some bushes where a skunk was hiding. The skunk was startled and he aimed his spray at the two of you." Alice answered again. "I'm sorry, Bella, but it was a direct hit."

I threw my head back, looking at the sky. _Why me??? _I asked God.

Alice wasn't finished yet. "Bella, one last thing. That mushroom patch you landed in? Well, they might be mildly toxic. We won't know for sure unless you get sick."

"Mildly toxic? What do you mean 'unless you get sick?' Can't you tell if they're poisonous?" I screeched. And suddenly, just like that, I snapped. I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted the weekend to be over. I didn't want to be anywhere near Emmett. I had reached my limit. I can put up with a lot of things, but this was it, the final straw. I was so angry I did what I always do when I'm angry: I started crying, harder and harder by the second.

Alice was kneeling down next to me, brushing my hair out of my face, wiping at my tears and trying to comfort me.

"Alice, I want Edward," I sobbed hysterically, over and over. "I want Edward right now; I want him to take me home. I don't want to play anymore."

I couldn't stop the tears as I sat there on the ground. I could hear a car pulling up the drive, hoping it was Edward but instead hearing a voice that sounded like Charlie's. Before I could think any more on it my stomach started to cramp and I barely had time to turn to the side when my lunch reappeared.

**Alice's POV**

_Oh Bella, I am so sorry_. She was a mess. She looked like she was developing a little rash on her neck, the leeches were going to town on her legs, and she smelled horrible from the skunk! And now here she was, crying hysterically, asking for Edward and saying she wanted to go home. I'd never seen her so upset, and I had never felt so bad in my life!

Emmett looked stunned, seeing that his good intentions had turned out so badly. A part of me was extremely angry with Emmett but the other part knew that this time it hadn't been on purpose. However, once again Emmett had failed to consider the consequences of his impetuous actions and once again Bella was paying the price.

I could feel a version of a vampire migraine starting in my head as I continued trying to comfort her. _I failed you, Bella, _I thought miserably.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, it did. I turned my head at the sound of a car coming up the drive and saw Charlie's cruiser pulling up to the house. _Oh no! How did I not see this?_

_Why is he here? _For once I was completely clueless. Charlie got out of the cruiser and looked in our direction and recognized the three of us at the edge of the lawn. The look of recognition quickly turned into panic as he realized Bella was sitting down, crying hysterically, with Emmett standing nearby and me kneeling down next to her, trying to comfort her as she cried.

"Bells! Bella!" I heard him shout as he came running towards us. "Alice, what the hell happened to her?" he said before noticing the smell of skunk and pinching his nose.

I thought very quickly about the story I needed to give Charlie. _Emmett, you are going to owe me big time…AGAIN! _I said to myself.

"I'm sorry, Charlie. This weekend has not been going as planned," I said as I shot a dirty look at Emmett, who had the good sense to look ashamed. "We wanted to get out of the house for a bit and decided to go for a little hike through the woods. Bella got tired and Emmett thought he could be helpful by carrying her back to the house. Unfortunately, Emmett's way back to the house was through the mother of all obstacle courses and here are the results." I finished.

Bella just continued to cry where she was sitting. Suddenly she grabbed her stomach and turned to her side as her lunch reappeared.

"Alice, what's wrong with her?" Charlie asked in a panic, forgetting about the smell of skunk as he kneeled down next to his daughter.

"Uh, Charlie?" I said. "I think we need to get Bella to the emergency room right now. Bella did a face plant into that patch of mushrooms." I pointed over to the ground next to the nearby tree. Charlie's realized what I was saying as I continued, "Yes, the mildly toxic variety. She spit most of them out, but I'm sorry to say she did ingest a few and they're making her very sick right now. Not to mention the poison oak and the leeches on her legs."

Charlie closed his eyes, shaking his head. Poor Charlie, he wasn't surprised anymore by the things that happened to Bella. Now it was all about damage control. He opened his eyes again and looked over at Emmett. I couldn't quite make out the look he was giving Emmett, but I could tell it wasn't good. It was very similar to the look he reserved for Edward. _Nope, not good at all for you Emmett,_ I said to myself as I chuckled darkly.

"Can you carry her to your cruiser, Charlie? It'll be quicker than calling 911 and waiting for an ambulance," I said as I thought how much faster it would be if I were the one driving Bella to the hospital.

We carefully pulled the sweater off Bella so Charlie wouldn't be unnecessarily exposed to the poison oak. He lifted her gently and started running towards the cruiser. I ordered Emmett back to the house to let Esme and Rosalie know we were on our way to the hospital with Bella, and telling him that **I** would be the one to call Edward. Then I ran after Charlie, climbing into the backseat where he gently placed Bella next to me. He quickly ran around the car to the driver's side, got in and raced down the drive with sirens blaring and lights flashing, on our way to yet another emergency room visit for Bella.


	10. Can You Point Me To the Emergency Room?

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

* * *

**Chapter Ten: Can You Point Me To the Emergency Room?**

**Charlie's POV**

I raced down the Cullen's driveway with my cruiser's lights flashing and sirens blaring. _Poor Bells…why do these things always happen to her?_ I was no longer surprised when something happened; now it was all about damage control, just making sure she was put back in one piece. _It's a wonder she's still alive!_ That thought made me cringe…I didn't want to think of what life had in store for my little girl; I want her around for years and years, but it feels as if she's living on borrowed time! _How did she make it to Forks in one piece? How many close calls were there when she lived in Phoenix with Renee? Was Renee even aware of how many times Bella might have been in danger? _Probably not, since Bella was too busy taking care of Renee instead of her mother taking care of _her_. In just under two years, Bella had been injured so many times I was beginning to wonder if moving to Forks hadn't been the worst decision she'd ever made. It pained me to think this way, because I wanted my daughter with me. But here I was, Charlie Swan, Chief of Police, and I couldn't keep my own daughter safe! Instead I had to watch _him,_ Edward, come to her rescue time and again; he was her protector. It was my job, not his! No, wait…that wasn't true. _It's not your job anymore, Charlie, _I thought to myself, _she's chosen someone else to be her protector and I have to accept it._

Yet I had to admit that Edward would risk his life to protect my daughter. Except for that time last fall, he had always been there for her, had always come through for her. How many times had he saved her from catastrophe? How many times and occasions were there that I knew nothing about? Someone was going to have to call him to let him know what had happened and it wasn't going to be me! I didn't want to think about what he would do to his brother when he found out Emmett was responsible for Bella's latest emergency room visit. Wait, maybe I wanted in on it. This is strange, placing myself on the same side as my future son-in-law.

Bella was still crying in the backseat, telling Alice she wanted Edward…she wanted HIM! A part of me ached as I listened to her calling for another man because I was her father, she's my little girl; she's supposed to need ME! _But no, she's not a little girl anymore. _I had to start accepting this fact. No matter. Bella would always know that I was the man who loved her first and I would love her to the last. She'll always be my little girl.

Looking into the rearview mirror again, I could see Alice tending to Bella. She looked almost as miserable as my daughter. Poor kid, she looks like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders. None of this is her fault!

But, it _was _Emmett Cullen's fault. What to do, what to do? When Bella first told me she was dating one of the Cullen boys, I immediately thought of him. While I think the world of Carlisle and Esme, and their foster kids are well-behaved and have never caused trouble, there was NO WAY I was going to let my fragile daughter date that giant! When Bells told me it was the youngest Cullen she was going out with, I breathed a huge sigh of relief because this was one instance where I was going to put my foot down! And now I find it was because of this guy that my daughter was in her current state. _There is more to this story than I'm being told and I'm going to get some answers! _But first, get Bella to the hospital…

**Alice's POV**

Riding in the backseat of Charlie's cruiser, I was thinking only one thing: _Emmett, there is going to be hell to pay when Edward finds out, which will be approximately 45 minutes and 23 seconds from now, and when he does I am going to do everything in my power to help him come up with the best way to teach you a lesson you will never forget._

I could see Charlie looking into his rearview mirror, anxiously checking on Bella's condition and it made me feel so bad, seeing the worry in his eyes and knowing I had failed him. I hadn't kept my promise to return Bella to him safely. I had to let him know how awful I felt.

"Charlie, I'm so sorry. I feel like I really let you down, both of you." I looked down at Bella who was still crying softly in my lap and holding her stomach. I brushed her hair back from her face, trying my best to soothe her.

Charlie said to me, "Alice, sweetie, it's not your fault. I know you did your best and I know these things happen to Bella." He was so sweet, trying to take away some of my guilt. He paused before continuing, "What exactly has been happening since yesterday? The only time I've ever seen Bella anything like this was last fall, you know, when your family left town. I need details. Your older brother is involved and I want to know how."

I sighed. The look on Charlie's face told me he wasn't going to let this go. Now I know where Bella gets her tenacity! Not only was Charlie her father but he was also a law enforcement official and he wanted to get to the bottom of the story. The only problem is how I give him all the details without exposing any of our secrets.

"Yes, Emmett is involved but it hasn't been in an intentionally harmful way," I replied. "Charlie, Emmett loves Bella, he thinks of her as his little sister and he's very protective of her, but like all big brothers he likes to tease and prank his little sister. This has been more a case of high-jinks-gone-bad. Unfortunately, when you take Emmett and his love of pranks, combined with Bella's propensity for attracting trouble the results are what you saw this afternoon."

I was hoping he would let it go right there…nope, no such luck.

"Come on Alice, it's me you're talking to. What exactly happened? I get the general idea of what happened today, but you also mentioned your brother was having fun at Bella's expense. I want details…this is my daughter we're talking about and I need to know." Charlie said quietly but forcefully. I was going to have to rat out Emmett. Wait a second. _Alice, you are about to be brilliant!_ Telling Charlie might work to our advantage later on. I was already coming up with payback ideas to go over with Edward and I had a very strong hunch that telling Charlie everything was going to pay off when we made our move against Emmett. If we could get Charlie in on this, Emmett would never know what hit him!

"Okay Charlie, I'll spill. I'll tell you everything that happened, starting with yesterday when we arrived at my house. We had just pulled into the garage and Bella was getting out of the car when Emmett snuck up behind Bella and…"

Sorry, Emmett. No, not really…

**Emmett's POV**

_Oh man, what was Charlie doing here at our house? Did Alice tell him about yesterday? Or did Bella tell him? Was that why they were laughing when I returned home yesterday???_ Aw, man, now I'm getting paranoid! Charlie had given me this strange look and if I didn't know better I'd say it was the same "look" he gives Edward every time he sees him. Wait…it IS the same look. Shoot! I am in trouble.

Running into the house I called out for Esme and Rosalie who were downstairs in a flash. I won't go into details but when I told them that Charlie and Alice were on the way to the hospital with Bella, I didn't have to be Jasper to feel the anger rolling off Esme. She was practically shooting daggers from her eyes, straight at me! I swear I saw steam coming out of her ears! And then that feral look in her eyes; I only saw it when we were hunting our prey. No, wait…it was like in those nature programs where the parents eat their young. Oh, not good! And Rosalie didn't look much better. Standing in front of the two women, I saw my life once again flashing before my eyes. _Whoosh_! There it goes! Yes, it appears I am a dead man, again.

**Rosalie's POV**

_Why, Emmett, why? God helps those who help themselves, but you…you'll help yourself alright, right over a cliff! Way to go, babe. I warned you. I asked you to listen to me. Now Bella's hurt. __Again__!__ Esme and Alice want to skin you alive. __Again__! And I don't even want to think of what Edward is going to want to do to you when he finds out!_

I started to get angrier and angrier by the second. _You totally blew me off, your own wife! Did you stop to think that I might want you to stick around for eternity? Instead, you have a death wish, and it's highly possible you won't see another sunrise once Edward arrives. Alright, fine! You need to be taught a lesson, Mr. Cullen. A lesson I know Edward and Alice are going to make sure you receive and I want in on it this time!_

**Esme's POV**

When Emmett came running into the house to tell us that Charlie and Alice were on their way to the hospital with Bella my first thought was, _My poor Bella. I'm on my way sweetheart. I'll be there soon._ Nothing was going to stop me; I was going to give what support I could to my daughter. Alice had told Emmett to let us know she was going to call Edward and tell him to get back to Forks right away. That was fine by me, but I needed to call Carlisle as well, so he could prevent my eldest son from doing anything he might later regret. _Oh Bella, Edward. _These two just can't catch a break!

My next thoughts were of Emmett, of wild animals and the parent eating its young. _I wonder what could possibly have triggered that idea,_ I thought sarcastically to myself. I don't know the details of what happened this afternoon, but it had Emmett written all over it. I was going to find out. It was time to put an end to it.

**Charlie's POV**

We arrived at the hospital in minutes and I raced through the parking lot, parking near the emergency room entrance. Bella was still curled up in the back seat of the cruiser, clutching her stomach and crying. It looked like that poison oak had brushed up against her neck; it was turning red. And those leeches were doing a number on my daughter's legs as well, but she was too miserable to notice. Gently lifting her out of the cruiser I quickly walked to the emergency room entrance. Alice followed us and after I had set Bella down on the sofa in the waiting room I asked her to stay with Bella while I found a doctor and took care of the necessary paperwork. What I wouldn't give to have Carlisle treating her right now!

**Alice's POV**

Charlie asked me to stay with Bella while he searched for a doctor and completed the admissions paperwork. As if I would ever leave my sister again! There was no way I was leaving Bella from this point on! I wasn't going to let anything else happen to her, and once Edward arrived and we got Bella treated, he and I were going to have a long discussion about what I was now calling "The Emmett Situation." Edward was going to read my thoughts and I wasn't going to hold back. I wasn't going to leave anything out…he was going to see it ALL! _Just in case, I'd better have Jazz nearby to calm him down. _After all, what fun would it be to have Emmett destroyed when it'll be so much more fun pranking him?

I turned back to Bella and saw her looking up at me, the saddest expression on her face. _My poor little sister. _Through her sobs, she asked to use my phone. PERFECT. Let's have Edward get the news from Bella herself.

I immediately pulled out my phone and dialed Edward's number before handing it to Bella. This was going to be good.

**Bella's POV**

Charlie had gone to find a doctor and complete the paperwork to have me admitted to the hospital…again. Alice had stayed with me and I curled up next to her as we waited for an examination room to open up. I couldn't help but be touched by her show of love and loyalty. I loved her so much; she's always looking out for me…and that's why I felt bad seeing the miserable expression on her face. I could tell she was feeling really bad about the day, about the whole weekend so far. _Oh Alice, it's not your fault!_ I wanted to tell her, but I couldn't stop crying.

I needed Edward now. Only he could me feel safe and only he could keep his idiot brother away from me! Carlisle and Jasper would be with him as well. I didn't want anyone but Carlisle treating me. He had a way of calming me down and I could almost forget I was in a hospital with the needles and blood that made me want to faint.

"Alice," I sobbed. "I need Edward now. I want him with me and I want Carlisle to treat me. Please, let me use your phone, let me call him."

Alice didn't hesitate. She immediately pulled out her phone and dialed Edward's number. I knew I could count on her. I wanted so badly for Edward to be here right now; I needed him. I couldn't stop crying and he was going to freak out, I was sure of it. I just hoped I could say the words I wanted to say before I started crying again. I know Alice won't let me down; she'll pick up wherever I leave off. All I care about is hearing his voice. I had to let him know that he needed to come back to me, right away…

Edward answered almost immediately and hearing his beautiful voice on the line almost made me start crying again. He thought it was Alice calling because he said, "Alice, is everything alright?"

Suddenly I choked up and started sobbing into the phone, "Edward. Edward, I need you to come home. Please come back, please come home to me."

I could see his beautiful face in my mind's eye, the love and tenderness in his eyes, and then I heard the panic in his voice as he replied, "Bella, love, what's wrong? Where are you, sweetheart? Are you hurt? What's happened?"

I answered in between sobs, "Your brother…he's been pranking me all weekend and I don't want to play any more." I started crying even harder when suddenly I gasped, dropping the phone before clutching my stomach and crying out, "Oh, God, I'm going to be sick!!!"

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A/N: I want to thank all of you who left reviews on the previous chapters. I'm so glad that you're getting as many laughs reading my story as I get while I'm writing it. Let me know how you liked this chapter. Just click the little button below. Next chapter, Edward is on his way back!


	11. Calling Down the Thunder

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Eleven: Calling Down the Thunder**

**Edward's POV**

Racing through the forest to meet up with Carlisle and Jasper, I let my thoughts wander to Bella. _Who was I kidding? I'm always thinking of Bella, every moment, every second, every minute of every day!_ Alice had promised Bella a nice, relaxing weekend and as long as my Bella was having a good time, I would be satisfied. _A relaxed and happy Bella equals a relaxed and happy Edward, _I thought with a smile. She was safe with Alice and the others. I had no reason to think otherwise as Alice is as protective of Bella as I; she would never let harm come to Bella.

Thinking about Bella made me anxious to return to Forks. We'd been apart for just a day and a half and yet the ache from being separated was intense. She's a part of my soul, my other half; she's what makes me complete and when we're not together I feel as if the better part of myself is missing. However, this hunting trip had been necessary. It was what kept me safe for her, safe to be around her because, while I no longer thirsted for her blood there were _other _things pulling me towards her, making it hard for me to resist her and it was vital that I never lose control. I would never take a chance with her safety. Yet, soon I wouldn't have to be careful and we would never be apart again. We would be together for eternity.

My thoughts went back to Carlisle and Jasper. We'd gone further north than intended, quickly finding an abundant supply of bears and mountain lions, the perfect prey to satisfy my thirst. I was feeling much better; better, that is, until "the call."

I had almost reached the nearby clearing where the Volvo was parked when my cell phone went off. Looking at the caller ID I was surprised to see it was Alice. _This can't be good. _Immediately I opened my phone and spoke into it. "Alice, is everything alright?"

Instead of Alice's voice, I heard the most beautiful sound in the world, the voice of an angel… my Bella. I would travel to the ends of the earth and back, do anything she asked, give her anything her heart desired, just to hear her voice.

Suddenly my angel started to cry. "Edward. Edward, I need you to come home. Please come back, please come home to me."

_What was going on? Was she in danger? Had she been hurt? _I was anxiously asking myself these questions. In my mind's eye I saw her beautiful face and those glorious brown eyes I lose myself in every time I gaze into them. I was now picturing those beautiful eyes filled with tears. Bella wasn't given to crying, unless she was angry…or upset.

Trying to sound calmer than I felt I answered, "Bella, love, what's wrong? Where are you, sweetheart? Are you hurt? Did someone hurt you?"

Bella was still crying, struggling to speak. "Your brother…he's been pranking me all weekend and I don't want to play any more." _Emmett_…I growled to myself. _What the hell have you been doing? _Before I could respond I heard her gasp and then cry out, "Oh, God, I'm going to be sick!!!" before dropping the phone.

"Bella! Bella!" I yelled into the phone, no longer pretending to be calm. I could hear her in the background, sounding as if she were throwing up. Alice was trying to comfort her. _What was happening? _If I didn't get some answers soon I was going to go mad! I needed to get Alice's attention so I started calling her name knowing she would hear me with her sensitive vampire hearing.

After what felt like hours, but was only a few seconds, I heard Alice's voice on the line. "Edward, you need to get back here immediately. Charlie and I just brought Bella to the emergency room."

"WHAT??? Alice, why the hell is she at the hospital? She's supposed to be having manicures and facials with you, not making emergency room visits!" I yelled angrily, _"What did Emmett do to her?"_

"Edward Cullen, don't you start yelling at me! Yell at that stupid, overgrown idiot brother of ours!" she shouted back, before continuing in a calmer voice. "Please, just get back to Forks as fast as you can. Bella's been crying for you for the past hour." I could hear the concern for Bella in her voice and I winced, feeling bad for having yelled at my favorite sister.

"I'm sorry, Alice," I said, speaking more calmly. "I didn't mean to yell at you, but you know how I get where Bella is concerned. I can't bear to see her hurt or crying." I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to remain calm. "Tell me, how badly is she hurt?" I asked, afraid to hear the answer.

Alice sighed heavily into the phone. "Nothing life-threatening, Edward. But she's in shock and she's been crying non-stop for the better part of the hour. Racing heartbeat, no breathing, heart stopped for a minute, slipping down the stairs, poison oak, leeches, skunk, poisoning…"

I exploded again, "NO BREATHING? NO HEARTBEAT? POISONING??? WHAT THE HELL HAS HE BEEN DOING TO HER?" And with that any calm I had managed to hold onto disappeared. _I was going to kill him!_

"Edward, do you want me to tell you what's happening or not? Stop interrupting me!" Alice said before continuing. "The no breathing, no heartbeat, racing heart and slip and fall happened yesterday. The poisoning is from mushrooms, the mildly toxic kind. There was a patch of them near a tree at the edge of our property. Bella took a fall and landed face first in the patch. She got a mouthful and started spitting them out, but unfortunately she swallowed a few, which was enough to make her sick."

I started rubbing my face before pinching the bridge of my nose, a habit of mine when I'm trying to calm myself. It wasn't working.

Alice continued. "There are also leeches on her legs, which of course is not surprising considering this is Bella we're talking about and her blood is damn near irresistible to any creature that craves it! Just get back here as soon as possible!"

"Okay. I'm meeting up with Carlisle and Jasper." I replied as I ran into the clearing. "Please tell Bella I love her and that I'm on my way."

"I will," replied my sister. "And Edward, tell Carlisle I said to fill you in on the details he left out yesterday when he told you about Bella's 'trip and fall' incident. Don't be upset with him; we were under orders from Bella and since she wasn't seriously hurt we agreed to her request, but I think you should know the details. The rest I'll fill you in on when you get here." And with that Alice hung up.

I stood there with the phone in hand, taking deep breaths, desperately trying to stay in control. I needed to calm down. I needed to focus. _I needed to rip Emmett to shreds. _I put my fist through a nearby tree before ripping it from the ground and throwing it across the clearing where it struck another tree, splitting it in half. I reached for another tree, and another. Next was a large rock which was reduced to dust after I hurled it at a larger boulder in the distance. With each object I sent flying I could feel my anger growing, not lessening. I didn't care about the noise I was making. I had to find a way to release the anger that was threatening to burn out of control.

**Carlisle's POV**

Jasper and I were running through the forest and had almost reached the clearing where we were to meet Edward when my cell phone rang. _Esme. _I knew this wasn't going to be good, and it wasn't. She was calling to let me know that she and Rosalie were on their way to the hospital. _What was that? _She didn't go into detail; all she said was that it involved Emmett…again. Whatever had happened this afternoon, it had sent Bella to the emergency room and Esme was asking me to hurry back home and to "prevent our eldest son from doing something he would regret." She also mentioned Alice would be calling Edward shortly. Jasper was listening to the conversation and he nodded his head, understanding that we needed to get to Edward quickly. We started running in the direction of the clearing and were only a few miles away when we heard a loud, thundering crash echo through the forest. I glanced at Jasper.

"Too late," Jasper said, "He knows."

I have never seen Edward completely lose his control. Not when he left Bella, not when he started tracking Victoria, not when he thought Bella was dead and had made the decision to go to Volterra. Even when he argues with his siblings, he never loses control, never becomes truly angry. His anger was reserved for enemies, for any threat against our family, and more specifically, any threat against Bella. But what if that anger was unleashed against a brother? What then?

_Emmett, what have you done? _

**Jasper's POV**

As we entered the clearing I staggered backwards, almost knocked off my feet by the intensity of Edward's anger. It was like the storm clouds that roll through Forks: Dark, angry, dangerous…deadly. In all the years I've known Edward I have never seen him this angry. Only one thing could send him over the edge like this: Bella was hurt or in danger.

I started sending waves of calm towards Edward. His eyes met mine and I could see he knew what I was doing, but the anger remained. What's more, it was increasing! _Oh man, Emmett, what have you done?_

**Edward's POV**

"Edward!" I heard Carlisle yell as he and Jasper quickly made their way towards me, surveying the damage to the clearing as well as my currently unsettled state of mind.

Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder. "Edward, what's wrong? Is Bella okay? Did something happen to her?"

Carlisle's and Jasper's thoughts told me of their deep concern. However, Jasper was also alarmed by the intensity of my anger and was trying to calm me, but I was too angry for it to have any noticeable effect.

"Carlisle, we need to get back to Forks, now!" I stepped out from under his hand and ran to the car, jumping into the driver's seat. Carlisle and Jasper quickly followed, Carlisle getting into the passenger seat with Jasper sitting in the back. Throwing the car into reverse, I quickly backed up and turned the car around before racing towards the main road, desperate to get back to Forks as fast as possible.

Carlisle spoke first. "Edward, tell us what happened."

I let out a growl. "Well, apparently my idiot brother decided this would be the perfect weekend to prank my fiancée. Whatever he did today resulted in her being rushed to the emergency room. Carlisle, she called me from Alice's phone, in tears! She was pleading for me to hurry back to her, telling me she needs me! We have to get back _now_." I growled at the last.

Remembering Alice's last words I turned to look at Carlisle. "Alice said there were some details you neglected to mention yesterday regarding Bella's "trip and fall" incident. Now would be a good time to fill in the blanks, Carlisle."

Carlisle proceeded to relate the missing details of his conversation with Esme. Listening carefully, I couldn't help but think how unbelievably stupid Emmett could be! Didn't I warn him to leave Bella alone? How many times have I reminded him to be careful around her, to remember she's human and still breakable? And now, because he hadn't listened to my warnings, Bella was at the hospital, hurt and in tears! I was seeing red. Blood red. Vampire red. Glancing at my hands, I noticed I was causing cracks to appear in the steering wheel, which made me ease my grip slightly.

Carlisle and Jasper continued to shoot worried glances in my direction. I could feel how uncomfortable I was making Jasper feel; I felt bad that he was the one taking the brunt of my emotions. I could hear him pleading with me, _Edward, brother, you have to calm down. Please let me help you. _I glanced at Jasper in the rear-view mirror, acknowledging his efforts, but I couldn't let go of the anger. Bella was the only one who would be able to make me calm again. _She needs me. _There was no question about what to do; I had to get back to her. I had to make sure she would be okay, and then I would deal with my brother!

I stepped down harder on the accelerator, trying to coax more speed from the engine. From the corner of my eye I could see Carlisle glancing at me. His thoughts showed his worry for Bella, and for Rosalie. _Rosalie?_ Why would he worry for her? His next thought answered my question. He was worried Rosalie would no longer have a mate before the day was over. I looked at him and gave him a short nod. When I next saw Emmett there would be no stopping me.

**Alice's POV**

I ended the call with Edward and turned to Bella, letting her know Edward was on his way and that he said to tell her he loved her. This seemed to calm her somewhat as we continued to wait.

Charlie kept glancing over at us, helpless to do anything to comfort his daughter. Fortunately someone had finally arrived to take Bella to one of the examination rooms.

How could a weekend that started out with such high hopes turn so bad? The answer to that question soon appeared in the doorway. Emmett. He had just arrived with Rosalie and Esme.

**Emmett's POV**

I wasn't sure if I should stay behind or go the hospital with the others. Part of me felt as if I needed to be there. Bella was one of us and wherever the Cullens were, that's where I would be. I was sorrier than I could say for all the trouble my little pranks had caused over the last two days. But there was also the other part of me that said I should stay at the house. Bella was very upset and I knew I was the last person she wanted to see right now. Of course I would be the first person Edward would want to see after Bella…_so he could tear me apart_! Esme and Rosalie weren't sure what Edward's state of mind was going to be like when he arrived and had felt it would be best to stay at home, out of his line of sight, at least until he'd had time to cool off. But I needed Edward to hear my thoughts, to know how sorry I was for all that had happened, and to know I hadn't meant for any harm to come to Bella! Esme and Rosalie reluctantly agreed to let me come with them, but the moment I walked through the emergency room doors I knew it had been a mistake. All eyes turned to me. Charlie gave me the "Edward look" again, glaring at me until I was the first to look away. Yup, big mistake…

**Esme's POV**

We arrived at the hospital just as they were taking Bella into one of the examination rooms. I walked over to Charlie and told him how sorry we were for all that had happened to her, but Charlie assured me it wasn't our fault and that we shouldn't feel guilty about anything. Those reassurances, however, most definitely did not extend to my son standing nearby. Charlie was glaring at Emmett and the look he has always reserved exclusively for Edward was now directed at Emmett. It was almost laughable to watch the human man stare down the vampire in front of him. Almost, because I knew this was nothing compared to what my other vampire son, Edward, would do when he saw his brother…

**Rosalie's POV**

Esme and I had just arrived at the emergency room entrance, with Emmett in tow. I'm the first to admit in all my years as a vampire I have never been interested in what any human thought, said, or did. I've always ignored them. But seeing the misery on Bella's face and the worry on Charlie's, I couldn't help but feel sorry for them. Charlie caught sight of Emmett and from the look on his face I knew we should have made Emmett stay at the house. What was going to happen when Edward saw him?

**Carlisle's POV**

Edward had driven at top speeds and we very quickly arrived at the hospital where he pulled into my reserved parking spot, bringing the car to a screeching stop. We quickly ran to the emergency room entrance and were met by Charlie, Alice, Esme and Rosalie, with Emmett standing quietly off to the side. I greeted everyone, shaking hands with Charlie before quickly excusing myself to take over the examination, as I'm Bella's primary doctor. _Edward, I'm going to see how she's doing. I'll get you in as soon as possible_. Edward nodded in agreement when suddenly he stood still as a statue, the expression on his face changing from worry to anger. He had spotted Emmett and was now stalking towards him; the predator had found his prey…

**Charlie's POV**

One of the hardest things about being a parent is watching your child suffer. It doesn't matter if they are young or grown up. You want to do everything you can to protect them from all harm.

The second hardest thing in the world is being forced to stand next to the cause of your child's suffering, and not be able to do anything to that person. It happened when Edward returned to Forks after his and Bella's seven month separation, a separation which caused Bella to fall apart and become a shell of the person I loved with all my heart. There was now a feeling of déjà vu as I watched his brother step into the room. Emmett…the new cause of my child's suffering. The look I'd always reserved for Edward had found a new target. I glared at Emmett, pinning him to the wall with my stare, glad to see he was the first to look away.

Bella was finally taken to one of the examination rooms and I settled in for a wait, hoping we would get word quickly.

The emergency room doors opened and Edward came rushing into the waiting room, followed by Carlisle and his other brother, Jasper. He quickly nodded at everyone and walked up to me, shaking my hand. Carlisle also stepped up and shook my hand and then started to excuse himself, saying he was going to find where they had taken Bella and would assist with her treatment. I was relieved to see Carlisle. He had been treating Bella for her various injuries the past 2 years and there was no one I trusted more with her care, except perhaps the young man standing across from me. _How could I have ever doubted his love for her? _The fact he had arrived so quickly was proof of that, the worry written all over his face as well as the love and tenderness in his eyes when he said her name, all of it communicated his love and devotion to my daughter. Edward looked at me and nodded; it was as if he knew what I was thinking and wanted to assure me of his feelings. His lips turned slightly upwards. _Charlie, you're tired, you're imaging things_. Then I saw Edward's stance grow rigid and his expression become angry as his gaze landed on Emmett. He started stalking towards his brother and I had to decide if I would be arresting or_ assisting_ my future son-in-law… This was going to be a tough one; I was leaning towards "assisting" him.

**Alice's POV**

Jasper made his way over to me and pulled me into a hug. He whispered in my ear, "What's been going on?" Knowing it was going to be awhile before we saw Bella, I started pulling him towards the door so we could go outside and talk when suddenly I had a vision. In the vision Edward had spotted Emmett and was moving towards him... "Wait, not yet. Edward's going to need us."

**Edward's POV**

In what seemed like an eternity, but was actually a very short time we arrived in Forks and made our way to the hospital. I broke about a hundred traffic laws, exceeded speeds of 100 mph, weaving in and out of traffic and avoiding any law enforcement, but we were here without incident.

Arriving at the hospital I quickly pulled into Carlisle's reserved parking spot, bringing the car to a screeching halt. Jumping out of the car we raced towards the emergency room entrance. I was the first through the doors, glancing around wildly until I saw Charlie, Alice, Esme and Rosalie sitting in the waiting room.

"Where is she? Where have they taken her?" were the first words out of my mouth as we ran into the room. I quickly scanned the thoughts of everyone in the room, their thoughts telling me that Bella had just been taken to one of the examination rooms for treatment and they were now settling in for the wait.

I walked over to Charlie and shook his hand, followed by Carlisle. Charlie's thoughts ranged from worry for Bella, relief that Carlisle was now here to treat her, and most surprising was his approval of me. His thoughts were telling me he couldn't believe he had ever doubted my love for his daughter, approving the fact that I had arrived so quickly and the emotions he saw on my face and in my eyes as I said her name. _He finally sees how much I love her! _I looked at Charlie and nodded, smiling slightly when I heard his next thought, that it seemed as if I knew what he was thinking. My lips started to turn up at the corners, but then I caught sight of the cause of Bella's latest hospital visit and froze, my stance rigid and my eyes narrowed in anger. I could hear Emmett's thoughts, his remorse for all that had happened and his plea that I understand he never intended for Bella to get hurt, but I blocked out those thoughts as I started stalking towards him, the predator in me ready to pounce on the prey, ready to go for the kill, ready to punish the one who had harmed my mate.

Before I could take another step, Carlisle stepped in front of me, reaching out and placing his hand on my shoulder to remind me of where we were and that Bella's father was watching the scene unfold. I glanced at Charlie and had to fight the urge to laugh. _Carlisle, if you only knew. Charlie's debating whether or not he should __assist__ me! _However, I knew my father was right. This was neither the time nor place for retribution. First, I had to see to Bella and then I would deal with Emmett. Once again I nodded at my father who squeezed my shoulder and quickly left the room to locate Bella.

Jasper and Alice were next to stand in front of me. Jasper was monitoring my emotions as I listened to Alice's thoughts. _Edward, I know you're angry but this isn't the time or place for what you want to do to Emmett. We need to talk and I promise I will fill you in on everything that's happened. Once you're calm and have all the facts, THEN we'll decide how to deal with our wayward brother, but right now Bella needs you and she needs you to be calm. Can you do that, for her?_

Could I do that for Bella? I would do anything for my angel and if it meant giving up my anger for the time being then I would do it without hesitation. I nodded at Alice and allowed Jasper's calming influence to help settle me down. Yes, when the time came we would give Emmett what he deserved. My Bella would have her justice.

I looked back over at Emmett and said in a low and threatening voice, "Soon Emmett, very soon…"

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A/N: Thanks again to all of you who continue to leave reviews. I've loved what you've had to say about the story and also the fantastic ideas for pranks to play on Emmett! Let me know what you thought of this chapter by clicking below.

In the next chapter to be posted soon, Bella is released from the hospital and with the Cullens start making plans for the ultimate prank against the King of Pranks :-D


	12. The Lion Returns to His Lamb

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Twelve: The Lion Returns to His Lamb**

**Carlisle's POV**

Entering the examination room I was greeted by the sight of my future daughter-in-law lying on the examination table, looking so small, so fragile and utterly miserable, as she bravely tried to hold it together. Esme and I have always known Bella to be the bravest and most kindhearted human we've ever met, and it tugged at my cold, dead heart to see her tear-stained face. For the first time I felt anger towards Emmett for what he'd done to my soon-to-be daughter. Yes, Emmett would need to be taught a lesson.

Bella caught sight of me and tried to smile as tears started falling from her eyes. "Carlisle…" she whispered, trying to put on a brave face. "Where's Edward? Please, Carlisle, I need him."

I quickly went over to her and gave her a gentle hug. "It will be alright Bella. Edward is in the waiting room with your father and the rest of the family. He's very anxious to see you and as soon as we finish up here we'll have you moved to a private room and I promise he will be the first person I allow in to see you, okay?"

Bella nodded and closing her eyes she quietly lay back on the table to allow us to get started.

I turned towards Dr. Smith, the on-call emergency room physician. "Dr. Smith, I hope you don't mind but I would like to take over. Bella, as you know, is engaged to my son, Edward, but I'm also her primary physician."

"Not a problem, Dr. Cullen. I'll let her family know that you'll be attending her." And with that Dr. Smith left the room while I turned back to Bella.

Sitting on the stool next to the examination table I reached for the medical chart. "Okay, let's see what we have here." I quickly scanned the chart. "Poison oak rash, leeches, and mushroom poisoning." Trying to lighten the mood I teased, "Just another typical day in the life of Bella Swan, wouldn't you agree?"

Bella opened her eyes, the expression on her face a cross between a grimace and a glare before she realized I was teasing her. I was able to get a small chuckle out of her before turning back to the issues at hand.

"Bella, I'm going to start by treating the poison oak rash. You're very lucky it's a mild case. Alice said you were wearing a long sleeved sweater which obviously protected you from further contamination. It was also good that Alice and Charlie removed the sweater as quickly as they did, otherwise you may have risked spreading the poison oak to other parts of your body." I looked to see how she was taking the news. She seemed calm, but I knew what I was going to say next was going to make her nervous. "Bella, even though the rash is mild and confined to a very small area of your neck, you're going to be uncomfortable for the next couple of days. I'm going to give you a steroid shot for the swelling and the nurse is going to apply Benadryl cream to the rash for the itch. I'm sorry, but it's the best I can do; you're just going to have to let the rash run its course."

Bella cringed as she saw the nurse hand me the needle, turning her face to the side and squeezing her eyes shut as I administered the steroid shot. As I was doing this the nurse started to apply the Benadryl cream to Bella's neck.

I looked up when I heard Bella say my name. "Carlisle, do you think you could remove the leeches next? I don't think I can stand it another minute…"

"Sure, Bella, I can do that. Let's see what we have here," I said as pulled the gown up above her knees. I cringed as I counted the number of leeches on her legs. There were a total of eight leeches, happily feeding on her blood. Knowing Edward would be able to hear me I quietly said under my breath, _Edward, it should comfort you knowing you're not the only one who finds her blood irresistible! _Edward's reply was immediate and sarcastic, "Thanks Carlisle, that's very comforting." Turning my attention back to the leeches I started removing them one by one, using my fingernail to push the leeches' sucker in a sideways motion to break the seal it had on her leg and stop it from feeding, then carefully pulling it off her leg. Once I had removed the final leech the nurse left the room to dispose of them while I cleaned and applied a sterile dressing over the wounds. The entire time Bella kept perfectly still, not opening her eyes until she heard me speak again.

"Okay Bella, all finished. The only remaining issue is the mushroom poisoning which fortunately is not too serious but I'm going to have you take oral charcoal to prevent further absorption of the toxin and I'm going to start you on an IV to make sure you don't become dehydrated. I know you're not going to like this, but I want you to keep you here overnight as a precaution, just so that we can monitor the situation. The nurses are going to wheel you into a private room and get the IV started while I bring Edward to you."

Bella silently thanked me through her tears. It was time to get Edward.

**Edward's POV**

Tuning out the thoughts of everyone except for Carlisle, I heard him speaking softly to Bella, trying to reassure her as he proceeded with each treatment. When he started removing the leeches he couldn't resist teasing me, in a whisper too low for humans to hear, _Edward, it should comfort you knowing you're not the only one who finds her blood irresistible! _My reply was a sarcastic "Thanks Carlisle, that's very comforting."

I looked across the room and saw Alice and Jasper motion for me to step off to the side with them. Alice didn't have to say a word as I listened to the thoughts going through her mind. She filled me in on everything that had transpired over the last two days, from their arrival at the house to Bella's phone call to me this afternoon. Alice left nothing out, allowing me to see in crystal clear detail everything that had happened to Bella. I started to get angry again, before feeling Jasper's calming influence. It also helped that Alice chose that moment to allow me to see her next memory, her smack-down of Emmett in the forest yesterday. I had to chuckle at this one. Jasper and I were going to be able to hold this over Emmett's head for decades! Jasper could feel I was amused by something and he raised one eyebrow questioningly. _What is it Edward? Your mood suddenly changed from anger to amusement. Whatever she showed you, it's gotta be good! _He looked over at Alice to see if she would elaborate, but she only smiled and said, "Later Jasper, I promise I'll tell you later."

_Edward, we have to get back at Emmett! I know you want to, don't tell me you don't. It has to be something he won't ever forget! I can see it already. Everyone is going to want in, including Charlie and Rosalie. What do you say? Can we?_

By this time Alice was practically bouncing up and down on her heels. Knowing Emmett would be able to hear whatever I said, even if spoken in a whisper, I silently mouthed my response to Alice and Jasper, knowing they would be able to read my lips. _Yes, Alice, it's what I want, but it's going to depend on Bella. I'm going to leave the decision up to her; whatever she wants to do, or not do, it'll be her choice. _

Alice beamed and nodded her head in agreement. _Yes! Of course it'll be her decision, Edward, but don't be surprised if you find she wants a little Cullen style revenge. She's going to want to teach him a lesson he'll never forget._

I nodded at her before moving to stand near Charlie again. I was surprised when I heard Rosalie's voice in my head. _Edward, I feel really bad about all that's happened to Bella this weekend. I warned Emmett to leave her alone. I practically begged him to behave himself. But you know Emmett. I want in on whatever you and Alice are planning to do. _

Rosalie's offer surprised me. Before I could react she went on to explain. _"I want in for two reasons: to teach Emmett a lesson for not listening to me, his wife! _Now _this _was the Rosalie I knew. Of course she would make this about _her_, not Bella, but then her next thoughts surprised me. _I can see the skepticism on your face Edward, but I'm really sincere about this. I __want __to do this for Bella. I still feel bad about how I treated her when she first came into our lives, but she's going to be my sister and I want to prove to her that I accept her and I will always be there for her. She deserves her revenge, even if it's against my Emmett, and I am more than happy to help her get it. I want to help in whatever way I can. Just let me know what you need me to do and I'll do it._

As unbelievable as it seemed, I could hear the sincerity in my sister's thoughts, and I nodded my agreement to let her know if and when the time came. She smiled at me before turning back to talk to Esme and Emmett.

Time seemed to be moving slowly and I was starting to get restless, anxious to be with Bella. I needed to see her, make sure she was okay, and have her safe in my arms again.

A few minutes later Carlisle stepped back into the waiting area, walking up to both Charlie and myself. "Bella's going to be fine, but I want to keep her here overnight, just as a precaution. I don't want her becoming dehydrated as the mushroom toxins make their way out of her system, so I'm going to put her on an IV to keep her hydrated and the nurses will be checking on her throughout the night to make sure there are no complications."

Charlie was relieved but I couldn't feel the same, not until I was able to see her for myself. I couldn't wait any longer. "Can we see her now, Carlisle?"

Carlisle turned to Charlie. "She's being taken to a private room and the nurses are hooking up the IV. Charlie, I know you're Bella's father, but she's been asking for Edward. Will you allow Edward to see her first, before we let everyone else in?"

I glanced at Charlie, my eyes silently pleading for his permission. I was surprised when he quickly agreed to Carlisle's request. "It's alright with me, Carlisle. Edward, you go first. The poor kid has been asking for you since I first arrived at your house. We'll give the two of you some time together first."

"Thank you Charlie, you don't know how much I appreciate it," I said as I again shook his hand. Carlisle and I walked down a long corridor to the room where Bella would be staying. I opened the door and got my first look at my poor sweetheart.

**Bella's POV**

Carlisle had arranged for me to be placed in a room at the end of the corridor, and as he left he told me he was going to get Edward.

I was still trying to control my emotions. It wasn't like me to cry like this, but these past two days I had received one shock after another and had finally reached the end of the rope and I snapped. Edward was the only one who would be able to stop my tears. I needed to feel his arms wrapped protectively around me, his tender kisses on my face, his fingers running through my hair, his words of love and reassurance. I needed him. Since I had arrived at the Cullens yesterday morning I had been on edge and only Edward's arms could make me feel calm and safe again.

The door opened and I saw Edward standing in the doorway. Our eyes locked and I started crying again, relieved and happy he had come back to me when I needed him so badly. "Edward …" was the only word I could get past the lump in my throat.

He rushed to the bed, carefully scooping me into his arms and cradling me protectively while softly kissing my forehead and brow before placing the sweetest of kisses on my lips. "Sweetheart, I got here as fast I could. I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere. I'm not going to let anything else happen to you. You're safe now," he kept crooning as he held me tightly.

"I'm sorry, Edward, I don't know why I can't stop crying. It was awful! Sometimes I just don't know about your brother. I know he didn't mean any harm, but he just doesn't know when to stop! Alice and I were so happy when we first arrived at the house on Friday, but everything quickly started to go downhill." I couldn't stop the tears as I told him everything that had happened over the last two days.

When I finally reached the end he gently wiped the tears from my face and kissed me again, holding me close. My tears were finally stopping; I knew it had everything to do with the man holding me in his arms. I felt safe, loved, protected. I was whole again.

Edward looked me over carefully, taking note of the rash on my neck, the bandages covering the wounds on my legs and finally the IV that I was hooked up to near the bed.

Edward looked at me sadly. "I'm so sorry, Bella, for not preventing everything that happened to you this weekend. I should have been here to protect you. I was a little suspicious when Emmett turned down the chance to go to Goats Rock; I should have known. I just should have stayed…"

I couldn't stand listening to him blame himself for something that wasn't his fault! I stopped his words by putting my fingers against his mouth. "No Edward, don't you dare blame yourself for what happened! It was your brother's fault, plain and simple."

"But Bella, I wasn't here to protect you. I hate that I wasn't here to prevent my idiot brother from terrorizing you!" He snarled angrily, his hands tightening on my arms before he realized what he was doing. He loosened his grip and started to pull away when I stopped him.

"No! I am not going to let you feel guilty about this! You're here now, that's all that matters to me. Okay, so I snapped, but deep down I knew all I needed was you to make everything right again. All I could think of was seeing you and being in your arms again. You are the one who makes me brave. With you I feel like I can do anything."

He pulled me close and kissed me again, pouring all his love and devotion into the kiss. I ran my hands through his hair, holding him tight to me, not wanting to ever let him go. But all good things must come to an end and Edward started to gently pull back.

"Careful, love, we don't want your father to walk in on our little love fest," he said teasingly. "Especially now that he's seen the light and is convinced I really do love you. I'm on his good side now and that's where I want to stay!" He smiled in delight at the shocked expression on my face. "Apparently he's found a new target to hate…Emmett."

"Really? And how do you know that?" I giggled as I imagined Emmett being on Charlie's bad side.

"Well, do you remember the look he always gives me when he sees me, what everyone in my family calls the "Edward look"? Now he's giving it to Emmett. He keeps glaring at him. You should see Emmett. He's squirming in his seat like the boy who was caught with his hand in the cookie jar." Edward was openly laughing now, which in turn was making me laugh. It felt good to be able to laugh after the tears and stress of the past two days. Gradually our laughter died down and he took my hands in his, bringing them up to his lips and kissing them. He took a deep breathe, exhaling slowly.

"I am so angry with him right now, Bella. I have to admit I lost control in the forest after Alice ended our call. I practically tore up the clearing where the car was parked. And then when we arrived at the hospital and I saw Emmett it was all I could do to stop myself from tearing him to shreds. Carlisle had to step in front of me and remind me we were in a hospital and that your father was watching." Edward started laughing again. "I'm sorry, love. I'm laughing because when Carlisle stopped me from going after Emmett in the waiting room, I had been listening to your father's thoughts. He was thinking about how he could _assist_ me in whatever I was planning to do to Emmett!"

That made me laugh too. _T__his is going to take some getting used to, Charlie taking sides with Edward! _I stopped laughing as I considered how badly it might have turned out if Edward hadn't been able to stop himself from going after his brother. When a vampire's mate is in danger or if the mate is injured or killed, there is nothing the surviving mate won't do to avenge them. As Edward's injured mate, he would have gone after his brother without a second thought. His own brother! Edward has told me time and again that I am his life and here was absolute proof! But as much as the thought warmed me, I didn't want to be the cause of a rift between him and his brother. What I love most about the Cullens is that they are a real family. They have their squabbles like any human family, but even when they argue with each other there is always love, always devotion, and always loyalty to each other. I couldn't live with myself if I was the means of destroying that.

Gently placing my hands on Edward's face I pulled him closer to me, touching my forehead to his and looking deeply into his eyes. "I know you're angry. I'm angry too. But he's your brother and I couldn't bear it if I were the cause of a rift in your family…" Edward looked as if he was about to interrupt so I quickly continued, "That being said, I don't recall saying that he could go unpunished."

Edward affectionately rubbed his nose against mine. "So…my little lamb has teeth after all?" He started waggling his brows up and down, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Are you saying you wouldn't be adverse to a little Cullen style revenge?"

I looked at him, pretending to be shocked. "Edward! You know I'm not the type of person who thinks to get back at anyone who's harmed or crossed me! But…I never claimed to be a saint and after what your brother put me through I think he needs to be taught a lesson. I think it's time for the self-proclaimed "King of Pranks" to be taken down a notch or two, wouldn't you agree?"

I saw my favorite crooked smile on Edward's face, the one that made me weak in the knees. I shivered as he lowered his head to my neck, softly kissing his way up to my ear while growling, "This lion likes his lamb with teeth! Okay, my love, we'll do it your way. Tomorrow, after you've been released from the hospital and had some rest, we'll start making our plans."

He turned his head towards the door. "It sounds like the family is making their way down the corridor. Are you ready to receive your visitors?"

I nodded and Edward gave me one last, wonderful kiss before we made ourselves ready to greet the family.

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A/N: Hey everyone! We're getting closer to the big prank! I'll try to post the next chapter tomorrow. Just a couple of days until NM! Are you excited?


	13. The Emmett Situation

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Thirteen: The "Emmett Situation"**

**Edward's POV**

I spent the night with Bella at the hospital, refusing to leave her side. Surprisingly it was Charlie who agreed it would be alright for me to stay with her. He understood why Bella didn't want to see me go. The tears were gone and she was starting to look herself again. He knew it was due in large part to my presence. There was no way I was going to let anyone disturb her tonight. Since there were going to be nurses coming in throughout the night, Charlie felt it would be safe to leave us alone. I asked if I could bring her home in the morning, which he agreed to as well.

I didn't take my eyes off her all night as I sat in the chair next to her bed, holding her hand as I watched her sleep. I thought back to yesterday when the family had finally been allowed to see Bella. She was happy to see everyone, but the moment Emmett came into view I felt her tense. Charlie saw this and noted how quickly she relaxed when I put my arms around her, wrapping her in my protective embrace while glaring at my brother. I could hear nothing but approval in his thoughts. Gone was the "Edward look" and in its place were looks of gratitude and respect.

I watched Emmett carefully as he offered his apologies to Bella. Bella graciously accepted, and while I knew he was sincere I wasn't going to let him off the hook that easily. I continued to glare at him until he and Rosalie made their excuses to leave, saying they had things to do before going home.

As the visit progressed I listened to the thoughts in the room and noticed there seemed to be a general consensus that Emmett deserved some sort of payback. Nothing drastic, but good enough to ensure he wouldn't be tempted to pull any more pranks on Bella, at least not until after she was changed. Surprisingly, Charlie's thoughts also indicated he wanted some sort of payback on behalf of his daughter. Interesting…

Bella was still sleeping when Carlisle arrived at the hospital in the early hours of the morning. He made his way over to the bed, asking me how she'd slept during the night. I was able to tell him she'd slept peacefully, no complications. Satisfied, he told me that he was going to his office to start filling out the release papers and asked if I would let him know when she woke so he could check her over one last time.

Alice and Jasper arrived shortly after Bella woke up. Carlisle had already been in to check on Bella one last time and seeing she was doing well he left the room to sign the papers allowing her to leave.

Alice and Jasper had decided to ride back to Bella's house with us and waited with Bella at the hospital entrance while I brought the car around. Helping Bella into the passenger seat I couldn't help but notice how tired she looked. Bella saw my concern and reaching out she twined her fingers with mine. "Edward, I'm fine. Really, I'm okay, just tired. I just want to go home. All I need is a little rest and I'll be back to my old self."

I looked at her carefully. There was nothing but truth in her eyes and I gave her a quick smile. "I'm sorry, love. I can't help but be worried. Let's get you home. I'm going to make sure you get plenty of rest, no disturbances."

I pulled our joined hands up to my lips, softly kissing her fingers and then her ring before putting the car in gear and driving in the direction of her house.

**Jasper's POV**

I kept tabs on Bella's emotions as we made our way to her house. She was calm, but I sensed fatigue as well. I did what I could to help her relax. Apparently she had noticed because not long after she turned in her seat to look at Alice and myself and silently mouthed "Thanks." I was touched deeply by the love and appreciation I could feel coming from her. It wasn't always easy for me to be around Bella, although it was much better than in the past. I knew I wouldn't be completely comfortable around her until after she had been changed and the temptation of her blood no longer stood as a barrier between us. Yet, in spite of everything I felt a certain kinship with Bella, because in a way we were both outsiders struggling to fit in. She was my wife's best friend and my brother's mate; there wasn't anything I wouldn't do to help her any way I could, which is why I was here with Alice to offer my support in the "lesson" that was soon to come.

Over the years I too have been on the receiving end of a prank by the self-proclaimed "King of Pranks." I've won some and lost some, but the one constant was we were equals, both vampires, indestructible. While I had no doubt Bella would be able to hold her own against Emmett when she was turned, the truth of the matter was that right _now_ she was _not_ a vampire. She's human, fragile and breakable. And it would be up to her mate and her siblings to help her take her revenge on Emmett _now_ rather than later.

The challenge of pulling one over on the "King" was just too good an opportunity to pass up. If we pulled it off, we would own Emmett for a very, very long time!

_Yes, Emmett my brother, you are going down! _I chuckled to myself as we pulled up to the house.

**Alice's POV**

I kept glancing at Bella, thinking how very tired she looked, but I was also relieved to see she was not jumpy or nervous after everything that had happened and I smiled thinking that all it took was having Edward back at her side to make everything right again.

Jasper and I had decided to accompany Edward and Bella back to her house for two reasons. The first was we felt it would help her feel more secure on the way home, not just having Edward by her side but also knowing I would be able to see anything coming and Jasper would be helping to keep her emotions calm and peaceful. It was working since Bella turned around and silently mouthed "Thanks" to the two of us.

The second reason was the "Emmett situation" that I wanted to discuss with Edward and I knew he wouldn't be leaving her side any time soon. I had seen their decision to teach Emmett a lesson and it was important that we start putting a plan together as soon as possible. Bella's house was the perfect place for this conversation as it was the last place Emmett would dare show his face!

During the night while Rosalie and Emmett were out hunting I had a long discussion with Carlisle and Esme about the weekend and its effect on Bella. As much as we love Emmett, sometimes the only way to get through to him is to give him a taste of his own medicine. I told them I had seen Bella and Edward's decision that it was time for some Cullen style revenge and asked if they would help. Esme agreed without hesitation. After watching what Emmett had done this weekend, she had lost all sympathy for him and her strong protective instincts for Bella made her decide she was going to help teach Emmett a lesson he would not forget. Carlisle also agreed the time had come to deal with Emmett. I asked them to meet us at Bella's house later in the afternoon, once Bella had had a chance to rest after coming home from the hospital.

I had also spoken with Edward on the phone while Bella was sleeping and he told me that Rosalie wanted in on whatever we had planned for Emmett. Sometimes that sister of mine surprises me! I quickly sent her a text message letting her know the rest of the family was going to be at Bella's house this afternoon and asked her to keep Emmett occupied until we returned, telling her I would fill her in on all the details later. Her return text simply read, "Copy. Will await further instructions."

Now all we needed to do was get Charlie to agree to help. This was going to be a piece of cake! Emmett was Enemy No. 1 on Charlie's list right now and I knew he wouldn't hesitate to help! We would have to be careful not to reveal any of our vampire secrets to Charlie, but I didn't see any problems there. I already had some ideas as to what role Charlie would play and were they good! Charlie wouldn't be able to resist and Emmett would definitely be blindsided when it happened.

We pulled up to Bella's house and I started to organize my thoughts and ideas.

**Carlisle's POV**

There appeared to be a general consensus amongst the family that Emmett needed to be taught a lesson. Normally I stay out of the little pranks and arguments that occur between my children, understanding that they are adults and can work things out on their own. It's what human families do and it was one of the things that made us feel human. But after seeing Bella yesterday afternoon and knowing the cause of her misery, I knew this was one time I needed to be in on whatever was coming. Alice came to Esme and me in the evening to discuss what she called the "Emmett situation." She wanted to let us know that Bella and Edward had decided to teach Emmett a lesson, and she and Jasper were going to help. She asked if Esme and I would agree to be involved. Without hesitation Esme said "yes." My wife is the kindest, most tenderhearted woman I know, with a deep and fierce love for all her children including Bella, but after seeing her youngest and most defenseless child being terrorized at the hands of her prankster son, her protective instincts came forward and she was determined to teach the son a lesson he would not forget. _That's my girl, _I thought to myself with a smile. I told Alice that I was in as well.

Alice started jumping up and down before settling down and asking us to meet them at Bella's house in the afternoon.

_I'm sorry son, but this is a lesson you need to learn. _I was certain that everyone, including myself, was going to enjoy this one.

**Esme's POV**

I wasn't surprised when Alice approached Carlisle and me about being involved in the planned "lesson" for Emmett. Truth be told, after watching Emmett _terrorize _my poor daughter, nothing was going to stop me from being involved.

_Oh Emmett, son, you've crossed one too many lines and now it's time to pay. _

**Rosalie's POV**

I received Alice's text message while hunting with Emmett in the early hours of the morning. He'd gone off to play with a grizzly so I was by myself when I read her text message. It said the family was going to be meeting at Bella's house this afternoon to discuss what everyone was now calling the "Emmett situation" and she asked me to keep Emmett occupied until they returned. I quietly laughed to myself as I typed in my response, "Copy. Will await further instructions."

_Edward must have told her about my wanting in on the plan. _

So, my job was to distract Emmett while the rest of the family worked out the details. _No problem! _I've had plenty of practice "distracting" my man! It would be fun for the both of us.

Some might ask what kind of wife I am to consider siding with others on a prank against my own husband, but I had to do it for Bella. It was going to be fun watching him squirm!

_Oh, babe, this is a lesson you need to learn and in the process you will learn to never again disregard a little wifely advice!_

**Bella's POV**

We arrived at my house and Edward came around the car to open the door for me, putting his arm around me as we slowly walked to the door. Charlie had been waiting for us to arrive and was standing in the doorway to greet us.

"How are you feeling, kid?" he asked as he pulled me in for a quick hug. I winced but gave him a quick hug in return.

"Better, but still a little tired. If you don't mind, I think I'll go upstairs and rest for a little while."

"Go on up Bells. I wanted to talk with Edward any way. I'll keep him entertained until you're ready to come back down."

I had to shake my head at the complete 180 degree turn my dad's attitude had taken towards Edward. If there was any good that came out of this whole experience, it was that it was bringing my two men together. I would take it any way I could get it.

Edward gently squeezed my waist. "That's fine, Charlie. I wanted to talk to you as well. I'm going to get Bella upstairs and tucked in and I'll be right back down, if that's alright with you?"

"Sure, go ahead. I'll visit with Alice and Jasper here and then we'll talk." Charlie moved towards the living room, inviting Alice and Jasper join him.

Edward lifted me into his arms and carried me up to my room. It felt so good to be back home, safe from Emmett! I only wished Edward could stay with me but Charlie was expecting him downstairs and the sooner I rested the sooner I could be with Edward again.

"Will you hum my lullaby to me and stay until I fall asleep?" I asked as he gently placed me on the bed and started to pull the covers around me. His eyes were soft as he lay next to me, pulling me into his arms.

"That's something you never need to ask me to do, love."

"Edward, what does Charlie want to discuss with you?" I was starting to feel drowsy, but I had to know what was going on before I could sleep.

Edward started laughing and I opened my eyes, silently asking for an explanation. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. Your father wants to talk to me about what I plan to do to my brother. Apparently Alice ratted Emmett out and now Charlie wants some justice on your behalf."

I started laughing too. "Are you kidding me? Is this Charlie Swan we're talking about? Charlie Swan, Forks chief of police, wanting to take matters into his own hands?"

Edward started laughing. "Yes, love, one in the same."

"Well, in a way I'm glad all of this happened." Edward stopped laughing, waiting for me to elaborate. "I like that the two most important men in my life are of one accord now. I like that you're both on the same side. I'd say this weekend has been worth it."

Edward shook his head with a slightly baffled expression on his face. "Bella, just when I think I have you figured out you do or say something to surprise me. You're always able to take a negative and turn it into a positive. It's one of the things I love most about you."

I gave him a soft kiss on his chin and tucked my head into his neck. He pulled me closer and pressing his face into my hair inhaled deeply. He let out a contented sigh.

"Bella, I think you should know Carlisle and Esme are going to be coming over later this afternoon, after you've had time to rest, to discuss the "Emmett situation." It seems everyone wants in on this one."

"Are you serious, Edward? The _whole_ family wants in on this?"

Edward immediately knew who I was referring to. "Yes, Bella, the _whole_ family wants in, _including Rosalie_. She really is very sorry about what Emmett has done and she wants to help. She says she wants to be there for you like a sister would be. I could hear it in her thoughts, love; she's sincere. Her contribution today is to keep Emmett occupied this afternoon while we're meeting here to discuss the situation."

"Wow. I have to say I never thought I'd see the day when Rosalie would take my side over Emmett's." I was quiet for a minute as I processed this piece of information, before suddenly remembering Charlie. "Edward, what about Charlie?"

"Don't worry love. It's one of the things I'm going to discuss with your father while you're napping. Alice and Jasper are going to stay as well as Alice wants to talk to Charlie. We want to get Charlie's agreement to participate, and you know he can never say no to Alice!" He started to gently run his fingers through my hair in an effort to relax me. It was working; I was starting to get sleepy again. "Now, what I want you to do is rest. I'll be downstairs and when you wake up everyone will be here and then we'll make start making our plans. Now sleep."

Edward started humming my lullaby again and soon I drifted off into a deep and dreamless sleep, feeling safe and content once more.

**Edward's POV**

Bella's breathing deepened and I could feel her body relax as she fell into a deep sleep. I carefully moved off the bed, taking care not to disturb her, tucking the blankets around her securely and brushing a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She was so lovely. Every time I see her sleeping I'm struck anew by how much I love her.

I made my way back downstairs to the living room where Alice and Jasper were sitting with Charlie. Alice's thoughts told me that she had been discussing the situation with Charlie and that he was going to be receptive to the idea of a little Cullen style revenge on Emmett.

I sat down in the chair across from Charlie. "She's asleep now. I think she's going to be out for a while."

Charlie looked in the direction of the stairs. "Poor kid, she's been through hell this weekend. We were talking about what happened and if Alice hadn't assured me that Emmett is actually protective of Bella and loves her like a sister, I would have been over there with my shotgun, ready to hand out some good old fashioned Western-style justice!"

All of us started laughing at Charlie's comment. The thought of him taking a shotgun to Emmett really was laughable. I could imagine the look of shock on Charlie's face when he saw his shot merely bounce off Emmett, no damage whatsoever.

Jasper commented, "Well, there's something to be said for justice, Old-West style. I'd bet the ranch on it! It was pretty effective in its day." Alice and I shared a smile at this; if anyone were to know it would be Jasper!

"I can't say any one of us would have tried stopping you Charlie if you had done that." I paused as I considered what to say next. "I guess the real problem is that Emmett doesn't know when to stop, which he proved this weekend. The question now is what to do about it. There is no doubt in my mind that Emmett has to pay. Bella is everything to me and I will protect her in any way I can. No one can do what was done to Bella and get away with it, not even my own brother. So, Charlie, what we need to know is this: are you adverse to a little Cullen style revenge?" I sat back and waited for Charlie's response. It wasn't long in coming.

Charlie snorted at the question. "Young man, the only thing I'm adverse to is not getting my hands dirty while you have all the fun. Bella may be your future wife, but she is always going to be my little girl and when someone hurts her they are going to have to deal with me. I'm in."

Alice and Jasper both smiled, Alice bouncing on the sofa in her excitement. Charlie smiled at her affectionately before reaching out to shake my hand. Bella was right; her two men were in accord and I was going to make sure it stayed that way.

"Okay Charlie. Carlisle and Esme will be stopping by this afternoon and once Bella wakes up we'll get to work. Let's call it, "Operation: Revenge."

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A/N: Hehehe. Are you ready for the fun to begin? Poor Emmett is not going to know what hit him.


	14. Countdown to Operation: Revenge!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

A/N: Hi everyone, sorry for the delay. It was New Moon weekend in the States and I had friends come in from out of town to see the movie. Thank you for all the wonderful emails telling me how much you are enjoying the story and asking me to hurry up and post more soon. :-D With my guests not leaving until late yesterday evening I didn't have much time to work on the story, but I was able to complete Chapter 14. I hope you enjoy!

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**Chapter Fourteen: Countdown to Operation: Revenge!**

**Edward's POV**

Carlisle and Esme arrived an hour after Bella fell asleep and we all settled in to start going over ideas.

Alice started first. "Okay everyone, we're all in agreement that Emmett needs to be taught a lesson, and I think I've come up with the perfect way to do it. There is a television show Emmett absolutely loves. The show is called Punk'd." Alice looked over at Charlie, not sure if he understood. "Charlie, Punk'd is a hidden camera practical joke show, kind of like a cross between "Candid Camera" and "TV's Bloopers & Practical Jokes." Being "Punk'd" refers to having a prank played on oneself. It's time for Emmett to star in his very own episode on what we will call "Punk'd…Cullen Style." I have ideas for the pranks we can play on him, but first I think we should listen to Jasper's idea for the mode of attack."

I already liked the direction this was going. I looked over at Jasper and motioned for him to speak.

"All of us who know Emmett will agree that he's not an easy man to prank. He has an uncanny talent for spotting a prank a mile away, which is why I think that our plan has to involve a certain amount of subtlety, finesse if you will. We would break it up into two parts. The first part would involve a series of minor pranks designed to start putting him on edge. He'll know something is not quite right, but there won't be anything concrete to prove it. The second part will be the main prank, the one that puts the nails on his coffin, so to speak."

Charlie turned to Alice. "Alice, you said you had some ideas for the first part. Can I ask what those are?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" Alice said to Charlie with a wink, earning her a fond smile in return. "It's actually a series of pranks that will start simple, with each successive prank becoming a bit more involved until the final prank at the end. All are guaranteed to mess with Emmett's head. I'm calling it "5 Ways to Make Emmett Cullen Think He's Losing His Mind." Each prank will be designed to make him think he's hearing things, losing things, or making him afraid of the reactions of certain members of this family, namely, Rosalie."

Intrigued, everyone leaned forward to listen as Alice went into detail about her ideas. Once she had finished all I could think was, _Clever, Alice, very clever. _These pranks were so subtle Emmett wouldn't suspect any one of us.

Jasper took the floor again. "We're going to set up video cameras where the pranks are to occur. I'll handle the set up and filming of each prank. Knowing Emmett as well as I do, I'm sure he wished he had a video camera on him when he played his first pranks on Bella. So it's only fair we do the same to him. After all, we're not doing anything he wouldn't consider doing himself. The beauty of it is he'll have no idea he's being filmed...well, he won't until after we've played it back for him at a later date!"

This set off a round of laughter as we all imagined Emmett's expression when he saw the tape.

It was my turn to jump in with my own addition to the plan. "I have an idea for the main prank. Bella and I will handle this part, with supporting help from everyone else, in particular you, Carlisle. I think we all agree this weekend has been stressful for Bella. From the heart-stopping scares to the physical suffering she's endured, one might think it may have affected her health in a bad way, wouldn't you agree, Carlisle?" I pointedly looked at Carlisle and saw his eyes light up in understanding. He understood where I was going with this.

"Yes, Edward, I would have to agree with you. The stress to her body could make her prone to certain conditions that might be serious enough to warrant special "medical" treatment. As her doctor I would need to carefully monitor any changes in her health. I would hope it wouldn't turn into anything serious."

"Yes, if Bella were to mysteriously start fainting for no reason, one might attribute it to the stress of the weekend's events. Emmett would feel incredibly guilty knowing the role he played in all of this." I looked to see if everyone else was starting to understand where this was headed. Apparently they did because the smiles grew wider, including Charlie's. At first he had seemed alarmed by what I was saying, but now that he understood my idea I could tell he was intrigued. He did have one concern about the plan, or rather, Bella's role in the plan and I waited for him to share it. It didn't take long for him to voice that concern.

"Alright, Edward, I see where you're headed with this, but I think you might be forgetting one key detail. I know my daughter, and my daughter cannot act to save her life!"

Everyone laughed at this, including me. It was true; Bella is not a good actress, but with the proper motivation and the chance to get back at Emmett for all he had done to her this weekend, I knew she would be able to pull off the performance of a lifetime.

"Charlie, I don't think there's anything to worry about. I have no doubt Bella will be able to pull this off, and she'll have me to help her with her part. Trust me, Charlie, she will nail it." I was proud of Bella and I wanted Charlie to understand how much I believed in her, just as she believed in me.

For the next three hours we continued fine-tuning the plan as we waited for Bella to wake so we could fill her in on the details.

**Alice's POV**

While Bella was sleeping we had been tossing around ideas, taking care not to reveal any information we didn't want Charlie to know. I had come up with a list of pranks to play on Emmett, while Jasper had come up with an excellent plan on how to execute the attack. Combined with Edward's idea for the final prank, I could see success on every level!

It's a tough job, being devious and clever but someone has to do it and it might as well be me!

As for Bella, I wanted her to be involved as much as possible. After all, we were doing this for her. The chance to help her pull one over on Emmett was too good to resist; there was no way any of the Cullens would not want to be involved, including Rosalie.

Edward was discussing his plan with Charlie, Carlisle and Esme. I waited for him to pause so I could catch his eye. _Edward, as soon as Bella wakes and we let her in on everything I will contact Rosalie and let her know her part. Then Jasper and I are going to go home to start setting everything up. _

Edward nodded in agreement and turned back to the others. Yes, Operation Revenge was going to be the mother of all pranks. Coming at Emmett from all angles, he most definitely would not know what hit him!

**Jasper's POV**

I was pleased with the way my idea was received by all in the room. As a former military man, when planning an attack I look at the plan from all angles, checking for weaknesses, utilizing the element of surprise, or covert operation where the enemy wouldn't know you were there until it was too late. With Emmett, the only way we would be able to pull this off would be to attack from all angles, but so subtly that he wouldn't be able to tell if it were real or just a figment of his imagination. And to get it all on film, well, that would just be the icing on the cake.

Unbeknownst to Charlie, I had a secondary role to play as well. Not only was it going to be my job to set up the video cameras and film the action, I was also going to be manipulating Emmett's emotions so that his reactions would be more intense. Everything from panic, confusion, nervousness, sorrow, guilt…he was going to feel it all in amplified form.

When we pulled this off, the king would rule no more!

**Charlie's POV**

People usually think of me as a no-nonsense kind of guy. I'm the chief law enforcement official in this town, a job I take seriously. I don't play games and I don't like when people try to play them with me. That's not to say I don't have a sense of humor. I do, and in my younger days I had a wild streak a mile long so I can appreciate a good joke. And when the joke was going to be on someone who's messed with my kid, well, more so the better.

I was especially going to enjoy the part I was going to play in this game. Emmett Cullen wouldn't see me coming until I was there. Yes, I was looking forward to this very much.

**Carlisle's POV**

As the head of my coven I take my responsibilities seriously. But is it wrong for me to feel a sense of pride in how devious my children can be? Maybe it's because it involves Bella, and Esme and I are very protective of her. Maybe it's because I know that Emmett can handle being the butt of a joke. At any rate, I was looking forward to playing my part.

**Esme's POV**

My roles were going to be minor in comparison to the ones everyone else would play, but that didn't mean I wouldn't take great pleasure in playing my part to the full. I was going to enjoy it thoroughly.

**Bella's POV**

I woke from my nap and lay still for a moment, listening to the voices downstairs. Looking at my clock I saw it was after 2 p.m. I'd slept for almost four hours and surprisingly felt very good. It's amazing what uninterrupted, terror-free sleep can do for a person!

Getting up as quickly as I could, I headed downstairs, anxious to join the discussion. I wanted to hear the ideas the others had come up with, and maybe add a few of my own.

Edward had heard me and met me at the foot of the stairs, giving me a quick kiss and a whispered "Did you sleep well, love?" before taking my hand and leading me to the living room. Carlisle and Esme had already arrived and were sitting with Charlie and the others, making small talk. Edward sat in the last available chair across from my father and pulled me down onto his lap. As usual I started to blush, this time because I knew Charlie was in the room, but all Charlie did was smile at us and go back to talking to Carlisle and Esme. _Wow, he really has come around!_ I thought to myself, shaking my head. This was going to take some getting used to! I greeted everyone in the room and then asked the million dollar question.

"So, what's the plan?" I was really curious to know the ideas they had been tossing around. The Cullens were the cleverest people I had ever met and I would never bet against Alice when it came to payback, especially not after what she'd done to Emmett in the forest. I laughed to myself as I remembered what Alice had told us girls about that day.

Edward looked over at Alice who nodded at him and then she proceeded to address the room.

"Well, Bella, while you were sleeping we tossed around different ideas. You know that Emmett likes to think he's the "King" when it comes to pranking so whatever we do has to be good because he can usually spot a prank a mile away. I'm not saying it's impossible, but it's going to be a challenge for all involved to pull it off…" I noticed everyone glancing in my direction. _Why is everyone looking at me? _I asked myself. Before I could think on it any further, Alice continued, "Emmett loves to watch "Punk'd" so I thought, why not have him unknowingly star in his very own episode. But this will be Punk'd…Cullen Style. Jasper actually has a great idea for how we should make this play out. Jazz?"

I looked over at Jasper and he exchanged a glance with Edward before turning towards me. "Bella, my idea is actually quite simple. The plan is to break it up into two parts. The first part would involve a series of minor pranks designed to start putting Emmett on edge. He'll know something is not quite right, but there won't be anything concrete to prove it. We're going to mess with his mind a little. I can sense he's already feeling a little paranoid, wondering if we are planning anything behind his back. So, we'll just encourage that feeling. These pranks are going to be handled by your father, Alice, Carlisle, Esme and myself."

Alice jumped in. "It's brilliant, Bella! I've already come up with a name for the first part: '5 Ways to Make Emmett Cullen Think He's Losing His Mind.'" She was so excited she was clapping and bouncing around as she said it.

Everyone started laughing, including me. I couldn't wait to find out what those five ways were going to be.

Jasper continued, "The second part is actually Edward's idea. It will be carried out by the two of you, with supporting help from the rest of us, in particular Carlisle. And this is where acting skills are going to come in."

The minute he mentioned acting skills my face fell and I realized why they had all looked at me. I could see it on Charlie's face; _Bells can't act to save her life!_ Ouch! Thanks a lot, Charlie, for the vote of confidence... I could feel myself starting to panic, my heart racing. Edward immediately knew what was happening and started rubbing my back while throwing a look at Jasper who started to send small waves of calm towards me.

Alice had also seen the panic on my face and knew exactly what to say. "Bella, call it a _hunch_, but I can _see_ success. Right now Emmett is more nervous about not crossing Edward and your dad; he's going to believe _anything_ you say or do."

I turned my face into Edward's shoulder as I thought about what they were saying. I whispered in his ear, "Do you think I can do this?"

Edward pulled back so that he could look me in the eye. "Sweetheart, I know you can do this. Yes, it's going to take excellent acting skills on your part, but I am absolutely certain you can pull it off. I will be with you every step of the way. We can do this, together, you and I." He pulled me in for another hug. I could feel his confidence in me and I started to feel it in myself.

I sat up straight and with my chin held high I turned to look at Charlie. "Okay Charlie, I can see it on your face. You don't believe I can pull this off, do you? Well, after what Emmett did this weekend, I want payback. I will be so good, after this is over you're going to be giving me an award for my Oscar-winning performance!"

Everyone started laughing, including Edward who squeezed my waist and whispered in my ear, "That's my little lamb, show me those teeth."

Alice came over to hug me. "Oh Bella, I knew you wouldn't back down from a challenge, "Alice said. "And that's why it's going to work. This is your chance to show Emmett that he should never, ever underestimate you."

Edward nodded in agreement with Alice. "Bella, Emmett really believes it's impossible for anyone to pull one over on him. He is so sure of it that it's made him arrogant. There is a saying everyone is familiar with: Pride goes before a fall."

Jasper started laughing again. "That's right, and what a fall this is going to be!"

I laughed at that. Looking over at Carlisle and Esme I saw they were smiling and laughing with everyone else, but I wondered what they were truly thinking.

"Esme, Carlisle. Are you okay with all of this? I don't want to do anything that's going to adversely affect the family."

Esme spoke first. "Bella, I don't want you to worry about anything. Carlisle and I are in. It's time Emmett was taught a lesson. You already know I think of you as a daughter; no matter what we will always be there for you and this is one of those times."

Carlisle waited for Esme to finish before adding, "Bella, I agree with Esme. You are a member of our family and we feel protective of you. It's time Emmett learned some self-control and we're only too happy to help."

I got up and went over to Carlisle and Esme, hugging them tightly and thanking them for being there for me. The mood in the room was light as we settled back into our seats and went over the plan some more, including who was doing what and how. Starting tomorrow, Operation Revenge would commence.

**Alice's POV**

Our little party broke up after another hour of discussion. Carlisle and Esme were going to stay a little while longer to visit with Charlie and Bella, while Jasper and I headed home to start setting everything up.

When we pulled up to the house all was quiet. Emmett and Rosalie were not yet back. Perfect…this would allow us to set the cameras up in the house. When they returned I would have to find a way to get Rosalie away from the Emmett so I could fill her in on the plan and her role. She didn't know it yet, but her M3 was going to play a role in one of the pranks, the one Rosalie would be involved in. She was going to object but once she understood how it was going to play out she would agree. I had already seen it.

**Rosalie's POV**

I kept Emmett away from the house all afternoon before we decided to head home. It had already turned dark when we reached the river at the edge of the property. Everything was quiet. I could hear Carlisle and Esme talking upstairs in Carlisle's library. I didn't see Jasper and Alice, but knew they would be home. And Edward would be spending the night at Bella's, just like he did every night.

As we were making our way across the lawn I saw Alice motioning to me from near the garage. She put one finger to her lips and pointed to Emmett, gesturing for me to get rid of him and to join her.

"Emmett, I think I'm going to go to the garage and work on the M3 for a while. Why don't you go into the house and see if Jasper is ready for that rematch you've been talking about all afternoon."

"Are you sure, Rose? I can come to the garage and help you. I don't mind." Emmett put his arms around me and started steering me towards the garage.

I pushed him away lightly, giving him a little slap on the arm while batting my eyelashes. "Emmett, I'm a big girl. I think I can make my way to the garage all by my little old self." He loves it when I tease him like this. Just as I suspected, it worked and he laughed and let me go.

"Okay, babe. I'll go see if Jasper's free, but don't be long, okay?"

"Oh, don't worry; you know I can't stand being away from you for too long." With a final batting of my eyelashes I gave him a little pat on the behind, causing him to growl and waggle his eyebrows at me before heading towards the house.

I went towards the garage where Alice pulled me through the doorway and ran with me out the back door and into the forest until we were far away enough that Emmett wouldn't be able to hear our conversation as she started to fill me in on the plan. My only hesitation came when she mentioned my M3. That vehicle is my pride and joy and no one touches it without risking life and limb, but when she explained the role it was going to play, I knew I had to do it. Everything was set to start tomorrow and I was looking forward to it!

**Emmett's POV**

Have you ever had the feeling something is off, but you just can't put your finger on it?

Rose and I had been away from the house all afternoon and it was starting to get dark when we decided to head back and see what everyone else was up to. I still wasn't too eager to be near Alice or Edward, but knowing I couldn't keep avoiding them I followed Rose home.

As we neared the house, my "Spidey-sense" started tingling. _This can't be good. _If I wasn't so sure I could spot a prank a mile away I would think something was in the works. Something just didn't feel right. I could hear Carlisle and Esme talking in Carlisle's library. It was late so Edward would be at Bella's where he spends all his nights. I couldn't see Jasper or Alice but the lights were on in their room so they were in the house somewhere.

Rosalie wanted to go into the garage and work on her car for a while so she told me to head to the house and she'd see me later. I started back to the house to see if Jasper was up for a rematch. _Wait! There was that_ _tingle again! _I looked around, checking to see if something or someone was trying to sneak up on me. Nothing.

_Emmett, old boy, you're starting to let your imagination get away from you again. Cut it out. _Yeah, I hope that's all it is, my overactive imagination…

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A/N: I know, enough with the teasers, right? Don't worry; the next two chapters are the ones everyone has been waiting for. I'm working on them as fast as I can and want to post them together because they are tied in to each other. I'll get them posted as quickly as I can. In the meantime, R/R. Thanks!


	15. Operation Revenge Part 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

A/N: Hi everyone! Thanks for being so patient. Finally, we're here! Operation Revenge was supposed to be one chapter only, to be followed by the final prank chapter but I was having way too much fun with Alice's '5 Ways to Make Emmett Cullen Think He's Going Crazy,' it was turning into its own book! So I've split it into two chapters. The final prank chapter will follow shortly, but I hope you enjoy the next two chapters as much as I did when writing them!

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**Chapter Fifteen: Operation Revenge (Part 1)**

**Edward's POV**

Today was the day, Operation Revenge. Bella slept peacefully through the night, not a sound coming from her except when she murmured my name or said she loved me. _My favorite time of the night_…I thought as I watched her slowly start to stir, rubbing the sleep from her eyes before sitting straight up in the bed, wildly looking around the room before focusing on me with a smile and asking, "Is it time?"

I pulled her back down to the bed, growling that I wanted just a few minutes more with her before our day started, and began kissing up and down her neck, slowly working my way back up to her mouth for our first kiss of the day. "Yes, my love, it's time. Are you ready for the fun to begin?"

Bella laughed, pulling me into a tighter hug. "I'm way past ready, Edward! I want this so bad. I want to see your brother squirm, to see him on the receiving end of a prank instead of me. It's time he had a taste of his own medicine!"

"Thanks my girl," I said as I pulled her up and out of the bed. "Go get changed. I'll bring the car over and then we'll get this show on the road."

I didn't need to be Alice to know this day was going to be perfect. It was going to be a day none of the Cullens would ever forget!

**Bella's POV**

It felt nice to finally get a good night's sleep. When Edward was with me, I always felt safe. I knew nothing could harm me while I was in his arms. I was rubbing my eyes, trying to wake up when suddenly I remembered the day. Today was Operation Revenge Day! YES! I sat straight up in bed, wildly looking around the room before focusing on Edward who was lying next to me. I smiled at him and asked, "Is it time?"

Edward pulled me back down to the bed, growling that he wanted just a few minutes more with me before the day started. Who was I to argue with that reasoning? I sighed as he started kissing up and down my neck before making his way back up to my lips for our first kiss of the day. "Yes, my love, it's time. Are you ready for the fun to begin?"

I couldn't help laughing as I hugged him as tight as I could. Of course I was ready! I wanted this so bad, to see Emmett squirm as he found himself on the receiving end this time, instead of me, and I told Edward this.

Edward pulled me up out of bed and after telling me to get changed he went home to get the car so he could drive me to his house.

Finally, I was going to have my revenge and I was going to enjoy every single second of it!

**Charlie's POV**

This was it, Operation Revenge Day. I could hear Bella moving around upstairs, getting ready for the day. Edward was going to come by early to take Bella over to the Cullen house where the first of the pranks was to occur later this morning. Those Cullens, all of them were early risers, and with the dark circles always visible under their eyes it was almost as if they never slept! I shook my head, wondering where that thought had come from.

I was going to be involved in Prank #5 which was going to happen until later this afternoon so I decided to head down the station. I would wait for Bella and Edward's call letting me know when it was time. That Alice, such a sweetheart but what a devious mind! I was going to enjoy playing my part. I yelled up the stairs to let Bella know I was leaving for work, shouting out a final "Make me proud, kid" as I walked out the door. _Your old man is going to give his own Oscar winning-performance later on this afternoon. _Yes, I was looking forward to it!

**Carlisle's POV**

We had to maintain appearances so Emmett wouldn't become suspicious. This meant I was at the hospital, in my office, currently tackling some of the never-ending paperwork sitting on my desk, waiting until I received the call letting me know when my participation was required this afternoon.

I had only one part to play this morning. I needed to phone Jasper and give him the excuse he needed to disappear for a few hours without Emmett becoming suspicious at not seeing him around the house. Operation Revenge was about to begin.

**Esme's POV**

I could see Alice flitting about the house, a nervous ball of energy, waiting for Edward and Bella to arrive so that we could get started. Today was the day, Operation Revenge, and we were anxious to begin.

**Rosalie's POV**

Oh, Emmett, my poor baby. Totally clueless as to what's going to happen today. And it was my job to make sure it stayed that way! _Sorry babe, judgment day has arrived._

**Jasper's POV**

It was my job to lull Emmett into a false sense of security so I had spent most of the night playing video games with him, letting him win more games than he lost. It was all part of the plan to make him feel relaxed and calm. Last night I could tell he was feeling nervous about something. Emmett would say it was his "Spidey-sense" but I called it his "sixth sense," that feeling he got when there was danger nearby or when a prank was in the works. The only activity that relaxes him, other than playtime with Rosalie (I'm not going to go there), was playing video games. We had just finished another game when my cell phone rang. I looked at the caller ID: Carlisle. It was time.

"Carlisle, what can I do for you?" I said into the phone, nodding at Emmett to give me a moment. Carlisle asked if I would make some phone calls on his behalf regarding some of our business interests in New York. He knew Emmett was nearby and would be able to hear the phone conversation. I told Carlisle I would do it right away since New York is 3 hours ahead of West Coast time and after ending the call I excused myself from the game, telling Emmett I would be in Carlisle's study for the next couple of hours. As I started up the stairs I heard Edward pull into the driveway. _Whoa, Bella! Gotta cut down on the caffeine!_ She was much too nervous, so I sent a blast of calm in the direction of the car. It worked because I heard a whispered "Thanks Jasper" come from Bella. _Much better. _

I continued up the stairs but instead of going to Carlisle's study I quickly detoured to my chosen hiding spot on the second floor landing where I had set up one of the video cameras that would be used today to capture the action as it unfolded. Looking into the viewfinder I panned out so that I could film the whole room, from the entrance to the living room and then the stairs. Camera ready…check. Emotion manipulation skills ready…check. Operation Revenge Begins…CHECK!

**Alice's POV **

Finally! Today was Operation Revenge Day and I couldn't keep still, flying up and down the stairs, practically bouncing off the walls. It's a good thing this is the way I am 95% of the time, otherwise Emmett would have been suspicious. Esme was watching me with a smile on her face. I knew she was just as excited as I but she's able to contain herself. Me, no way! As soon as Edward and Bella arrived we were going to start and I couldn't wait to help Bella take her revenge.

Jasper had completely lulled Emmett into a false sense of security. This was going to be so much fun! Operation Revenge, Part 1 was about to commence, starting with '5 Ways to Make Emmett Cullen Think He's Losing His Mind.' This is going to be so good! _Hurry up Edward, hurry up Bella!_

**Edward's POV**

As we pulled into the driveway and I parked the car, I could hear Alice's thoughts telling us to hurry up and I laughed quietly at her impatience to begin. I whispered in Bella's ear, "Alice, she's waiting for us, impatiently I might add."

Getting out of the car I quickly ran to Bella's side to open her door. "Are you ready, love? It's time to start working towards that Oscar-winning performance you promised Charlie."

Bella raised herself up on her toes and gave me one last kiss. "You just watch me!"

"Don't I always, Bella?" waggling my brows as I grabbed her hand and we started walking towards the front door when suddenly I hit upon a way to help my favorite actress get into role.

**Bella's POV**

As we pulled up to the Cullen house I had a sudden attack of nerves. How in the world had I agreed to do this? I was so nervous I was bouncing in my seat, feeling like I'd had six cups of coffee. No, I was bouncing around like Alice on a normal day! _Where's Jasper when you need him? _Jasper must have felt the nerves come off me because the second the car stopped I felt this intense wave of calm hit me and I completely relaxed. Breathing a sigh of relief I quickly whispered "Thanks Jasper."

I noticed Edward quietly laughing to himself. He leaned in to whisper into my ear, "Alice, she's waiting for us, impatiently I might add." He got out of the car and quickly ran to my side to open the door. "Are you ready love?" he asked as he helped me out of the car. "It's time to start working towards that Oscar-winning performance you promised Charlie."

I knew we weren't going to have much time to ourselves today so I quickly raised myself up on my toes and gave him one last kiss. "You just watch me!"

Edward started waggling his brows and replied, "Don't I always, Bella?" which got my heart racing. He grabbed my hand and we started walking towards the front door when he suddenly stopped and turned towards me. He stared deep into my eyes and leaned in, softly exhaling, his wonderful scent washing over my face. _What is he doing? _As usual I started to blush, my eyes began to glaze over and my knees were turning to mush. I whispered to him, "Hey, stop dazzling me! I'm trying to get into role here and you're making me weak in the knees!"

He chuckled as he said, "Silly Bella, isn't that what we're aiming for?" before kissing me senseless! Hmm, my vampire does have a point. I was dazzled AND unsteady on my feet. What teamwork!

Edward pulled away and waved me into the house as Emmett looked up from the TV, waiving from the armchair he was sitting in. "Hey guys, what's up?"

"Hey Emmett," I said as Edward turned to close the door and hang our coats on the coat-rack. _Here we go, _I said to myself as I started forward, still wobbly from Edward's dazzling technique. I decided to go with my normal reaction and as I took another step forward I thought back to a few moments ago and let myself feel dazzled all over again. Just as I was passing the armchair where Emmett was sitting, I came to a sudden stop and started swaying on my feet. "Edward?" I whispered, raising my hand to my head as if I were feeling lightheaded and then I slowly started to sink down towards the floor. Edward and Emmett both yelled "Bella!" at the same time as they ran towards me. Edward caught me before I hit the floor while Emmett kneeled down on the other side of me, shouting, "Edward, what's wrong with her? Bella, are you okay?"

"Bella! What's wrong sweetheart? Are you ill?" Edward asked as he held me in his arms, running his hand over my check and brushing the hair off my face. _Oh my gosh, he is good! Stop it Bella, stay focused on the situation! _

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Emmett starting to look a little panicked. _Could it be a guilty conscience come back to haunt you, Emmett? _I started rapidly blinking my eyes, letting them roll slightly before lightly shaking my head as if trying to clear it. "I think so," I whispered. "I don't know. I feel lightheaded and shaky."

Edward gently picked me up from the floor, holding me close to his chest. "Bella, you just came out of the hospital. I'm not surprised you're still feeling some of the effects of your ordeal." He glared at Emmett, showing he hadn't forgotten the events of the weekend. Emmett received the message loud and clear, if the apologetic look on his face was any indication. "Love, I'm taking you upstairs right now and you are going to lie down for a while. No arguments."

"Alright," I responded in the weakest sounding voice I could manage. Emmett was watching us and as Edward made his way up the stairs I turned my head to look back at Emmett and gave him a small smile and wave, playing up the "I don't feel so great" act. Emmett looked worried but he smiled and waved back at me. _Was he buying it?_ I didn't have to wait long for the answer because Edward looked down at me and gave me a small wink.

Yes! I'd done it! Together we had planted the first seed in Emmett's mind that something was not right with my health. I couldn't wait to continue my performance. But, first, there was a little matter of Alice's "5 Ways to Make Emmett Cullen Think He's Losing His Mind" plan. Instead of going to Edward's room, he made a quick detour to Alice and Jasper's room. Inside were several monitors Jasper had set up so we could watch the action. Edward set me down and we looked at each other, huge smiles on our faces. This was going to be the best reality TV ever!

**Emmett's POV**

I watched as Edward and Bella headed up the stairs to his room, unable to keep the worry off my face when Bella looked back to wave at me. To say that she'd given me a scare would be putting it mildly. She practically passed out in front of me! It freaked me out because I was still feeling guilty over my actions this weekend. And she had forgiven me so easily. It was one of the things our family loved so much about her, her capacity to forgive, even after we had basically abandoned her last year. She welcomed us back with open arms. I was constantly amazed by how forgiving she was, time after time. This, of course, compounded the guilt I felt having pranked her so badly this weekend.

Now, Edward was a different story. I knew he was still angry because the glare he gave me told me he hadn't forgotten this weekend, but apparently Bella had told him to let it go because he was making an effort to be nice and let bygones be bygones.

Since Jasper was going to be making phone calls for the next couple of hours, I decided I was going to continue playing video games. As I bent down to pick up one of the wireless controllers, I heard a noise coming from behind me. _Rip…_ It sounded like cloth tearing…it sounded like my pants had ripped! I turned around quickly, checking to see if this was the case but everything seemed fine, no rips whatsoever. "Weird." I muttered to myself. I went over to the armchair to sit down and as I bent my knees to sit down heard it again. _Rip.._. _What the hell is going on? _I quickly stood up and checked again to see if my pants were okay. Nothing. I looked around the room, checking to see if anything was out of place or if there was someone else in the room trying to yank my chain. There was no one in the room but me.

I started shaking my head. _I must be losing my mind, or my hearing! _Maybe I just needed to step away for a while, talk to Rosalie, give myself a break before playing some more games. Yeah, that's it. I dropped the controller and made my way to the stairs. Reaching out to grab the banister I heard the sound again, but louder this time. _RIP!_ I quickly pulled my arm to the right to see if my shirt was torn. Nothing! I started running up the stairs, anxious to get to my room before anything else tore…er, I mean before I heard any more noises in my head.

**Alice's POV**

One of the many advantages to being as small as I am is that I can easily hide myself, which was what I was doing right now.

I watched as Bella acted out her part perfectly! Yay, Bella! Emmett had taken the bait like a starving trout! Not surprising, since anyone within a 10 mile radius would be able to feel the guilt still rolling off him. And then there was Edward's clever use of his dazzling technique to help Bella get her role. I gave a mental shout-out to Edward for his and Bella's performances.

I watched as Edward and Bella took a detour to my room to watch the scene unfold on the monitors that Jasper had set up last night. While Jasper had been setting up the video cameras, I had placed a wireless monitoring camera in the living room where Emmett would not be able to spot it. The camera was exactly like the ones used by human parents to monitor their babies (appropriate, I thought, considering Emmett is like a big kid who's never grown up!). It had an extra wide viewing angle and could be wirelessly connected to one of the monitors in my bedroom so that Bella and Edward could see the action from my point of view. It was perfect! And now it was time for me to get into the act. It was time for Prank #1 in my '5 Ways to Make Emmett Cullen Think He's Going Crazy.'

_Time to start messing with your mind, big brother!_ As soon as I saw him bend down to pick up a wireless controller, I pulled out the little scrap of cloth I'd been holding in my hands and started to tear it down the middle. _Rip…_ Emmett's head shot up and he turned around quickly, looking to see if the ripping noise had come from his pants. _Sorry Emmett, not your pants, but you keep checking. It's making for great television. _

Emmett shook his head and muttered "Weird" before heading over to his armchair. As he bent his knees to sit down, I ripped another small piece from the cloth. _Rip… _Emmett quickly stood up, checking the back of his pants again. _No rips, Emmett. You must be hearing things. _Emmett started scanning the room, obviously looking to see if anyone else was in the room. The look on his face was priceless. _That's right Emmett; maybe you're losing your mind! _Emmett dropped the controller and started to make his way to the stairs. Now, when Emmett takes the stairs he always reaches for the banister. So the instant he grabbed for it, I ripped the cloth again, only this time it was louder. _RIP…_ Emmett stopped in his tracks and grabbed at his arm, pulling it to the right to see if he had torn his shirt. _Aw, Emmett, did you rip your shirt or are you still hearing things? _Emmett started running the rest of the way up the stairs to his room.

I held my hand to my mouth to keep from laughing out loud before stepping out of my hiding spot and giving a thumbs-up sign to the camera. Prank #1 was a success.

**Jasper's POV**

Watching Emmett as he kept turning around, looking to see if his pants or shirt had ripped was one of the funniest things I'd seen him do in a long time. Alice worked it perfectly! I had to keep myself from laughing as I zoomed in on his facial expressions. I could feel no suspicion coming from him, just confusion which I did my best to exaggerate. He ran to his room and I watched as Alice came out from her hiding spot, looking up at the camera and giving me the thumbs-up sign. Prank #1 successful. I stayed in position as we prepared for Prank #2.

**Bella's POV**

Oh my god. I have never wanted to laugh so hard in my life! Edward and I were literally shaking as we tried to keep from laughing out loud, watching as Emmett turned around again and again trying to see whether or not his clothes were coming apart. At one point Edward had to put his hand over my mouth, I was that close to laughing out loud. Alice was a genius! If this was one of the simple pranks, I couldn't wait to see how the more complicated ones played out.

**Edward's POV**

Bella and I were shaking in our efforts to keep from laughing out loud. There was a point when she looked like she wasn't going to be able to keep it in and I had to put my hand over her mouth. But I was happy to see her enjoying this. It was definitely worth it. Prank #1 was a success and now on to the second.

**Esme's POV**

It was now my turn. Prank #2, the mind games continue. As soon as I heard Emmett close the door to his room I went into the living room and removed all of his game cartridges from their cases, replacing them with a series of children's video games. I didn't recognize any of the titles, not that I recognized the ones that Emmett and Jasper usually played, but Alice assured me that Emmett would definitely be thrown for a loop. When I had finished I looked up towards the hidden video camera and gave the all ready signal to Jasper. Prank #2 was about to begin.

**Emmett's POV**

I had gone up to my room to talk with Rosalie before remembering that she was in the garage working on her car. There's another thing to be worried about! Not only was I hearing things, but I was also forgetting things! Maybe I really am losing my mind!

Not sure what to do next, I paced back and forth for a while before deciding I would give the video games another shot. As I made my way back down to the living room and the TV, I carefully bent down to pick up my favorite video game, still in its case, and praying I wouldn't hear another ripping sound coming from behind or to the side of me. Ah, nothing! I breathed a sigh of relief as I opened the case to remove the video game. _Wait a minute… _I did a double take as I read the title: Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel? _What the…? _I grabbed another case. ScoobyDoo First Frights! I started going through the remaining cases. Pikachu, Super Mario Brothers, Lego Indiana Jones, SpongeBob's Truth or Square?

First I was hearing things, then forgetting things and now I'm seeing things? What is going on? I rubbed my eyes, praying when I opened them I would see all my video games back in their cases. Cautiously I opened one eye and saw the kid's titles on display. _Damn! It's real, I'm not imagining it! _I started breathing heavily. If a vampire could hyperventilate that's what I would be doing right now. I dropped the cases and stepped back from the TV. _This can't be happening. This has all the makings of a prank…but it's impossible! I would know if I were being pranked! _

_Rosalie. I need Rosalie. She can tell me I'm not going crazy, that my mind is not playing tricks on me! _I ran as fast as I could to the garage.

**Esme's POV**

As soon as Emmett ran out to the garage I quickly removed the children's video games and placed Emmett's original games back in their cases, before going upstairs to join Bella and Edward where they were watching the scene play out. Not two minutes later Emmett was back inside the house, with Rosalie at his side. Grinning at each other we settled in to watch the show.

**Rosalie's POV**

Emmett didn't know this, but I had been standing outside the living room window, watching the scene unfold. So when I heard him start mumbling my name I ran back to the garage and rolled myself under the car, pretending I was changing the oil. Not 5 seconds later Emmett had come rushing into the garage, yelling about how someone was trying to mess with his mind because all his video games were missing, replaced by children's games.

I rolled myself out from under the car, pretending to be confused and sporting a slightly irritated look on my face. "Emmett, what are you talking about?"

"Someone is playing games with me! I don't know what's going on but you have to see. Come on!" He grabbed me by the hand and started running towards the house.

He pulled me over to the video game cases lying on the floor by the TV and started opening cases one by one. All had the original games inside.

"No, this is not possible." Emmett was saying as he shook his head. "I swear, Rosalie, there were kids' games in these cases not three minutes ago and now they're gone!"

"Emmett, baby. Are you sure that's what you saw?" I asked in the most solicitous, wifely voice I could manage.

Emmett looked at me with a confused expression on his face. "I don't know anymore, Rosalie. I could have sworn that there were kid's games in the cases and they've been switched back!"

"Well, sweetie, who would have done it? Esme is not a practical joke player and neither is Carlisle. Besides, he's at the hospital right now. Esme was in the garage earlier and told me Jasper is in Carlisle's study making business calls. Bella and Edward are in his room and Alice is probably in hers, most likely on the computer checking out the latest fashions."

Emmett started shaking his head, like a human trying to wake from a bad dream. "I don't know…maybe I really am imagining things."

"Why don't you just sit down and watch TV instead? No more video games, just regular TV. How does that sound?" I asked sweetly as I pushed him backwards until he was sitting in his armchair. I sat on his lap and started running my fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes, taking deep breaths as I tried to sooth him. Looking up in the direction of the camera I mouthed to Jasper: _Ease up on the anxiety, Jasper! _"Now, I'm going to go back to the garage and finish up. You stay here and I'll check up on you in an hour, okay?"

He nodded, keeping his eyes closed and rubbing his face. I went to the TV and turned it on, taking the remote control and setting it on the table next to the armchair. Looking up at the camera I gave the thumbs-up signal before I left the room. Time for Prank #3.

**Jasper's POV**

In between filming the second prank and amplifying Emmett's feelings of confusion and anxiety, I was hard pressed not to lose it completely. This just kept getting better and better! After silently telling me to ease up on the anxiety I was sending Emmett's way, Rosalie gave the thumbs-up signal for the start the third prank. I hope Alice was in place because the fun was about to begin again.

**Emmett's POV**

Rosalie went back to the garage and left me in front of the TV. Maybe she was right. Maybe I just needed to be quiet and watch a little TV. I leaned my head back against the armchair and started watching the ball game.

Just as the game was starting to get interesting the channels started changing. I grabbed the TV remote control from the table next to my chair and started pushing buttons, trying to return to the channel I had been watching. Nothing. I shook the remote and pointed it towards the TV again. It wasn't working. Yet the channels were still changing by themselves, and now the volume was going up and down by itself as well.

I dropped the remote. _What is going on? I need Rosalie again. _I know she's going to be pissed but she needs to see this! I ran out to the garage again.

**Alice's POV**

This was working out even better than I had foreseen. Emmett was thoroughly confused; he had no idea what was going on! As soon as Rosalie had given the thumbs-up sign I grabbed the universal remote and ran outside to the living room window, taking care to stay out of sight.

Unbeknownst to Emmett, I had placed a very thin piece of black tape over the signal on the TV remote so Emmett wouldn't be able to change channels or adjust any of the controls. With the universal remote I would be the one in control, changing channels and making the volume go up and down, whatever I wanted to do.

I pointed the universal remote at the TV and got to work.

Emmett was sitting in his armchair in front of the TV, watching the ballgame when, oops! I changed the channel! I could see him grab the remote next to his chair as he tried to change it back to the ballgame. _Sorry, Emmett, that's not going to work. _I kept changing channels, going up and down. Then the volume, up, down, up, down. Emmett shook the remote control and pointed it back towards the TV, while I kept changing channels, raising and lowering the volume. _Try the black tape over the signal, Emmett; that might be the problem!_ Hehehe…

I quickly ran to the side of the house, and not two seconds later Emmett came running out, headed towards the garage and Rosalie. He was going to drag her back into the house so she could see for herself and once again he was going to be disappointed.

I quickly went back inside the house and picked up the TV remote, removed the thin black tape covering the signal to the TV, and put it back where Emmett had dropped it. Another thumbs-up sign to the camera and I was on my way upstairs to join the others.

**Jasper's POV**

Oh man, Emmett. If only you could see yourself on camera. This footage is so good we should send it to the producers of the real "Punk'd" television show!

It was time for Prank #4 so I left my hiding spot and quickly grabbed the remote video surveillance camera. I would be able to film the action from the location of the next prank and the others would be able to watch on the monitors here at the house.

Avoiding the garage I headed towards one of the outbuildings where I had parked mine and Alice's Ducati's. Rose was going to join me as soon as she set Emmett up for the next prank.

**Rosalie's POV**

Emmett ran back into the garage with both palms in the air facing me, in the universally recognized "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed" pose. "Rosie, don't be mad but you have to come back into the house and see this. I don't know what's going on but after you left me sitting in front of the TV watching the ballgame, the channels started changing on their own. I wasn't even touching the TV remote and they just started changing! Even the volume was going up and down!"

I acted like I was annoyed at the interruption. "Emmett, I don't have time for this. I just finished up with the M3 and I wanted to do a quick oil change on your Jeep. You keep interrupting me and I'm never going to finish!"

"I know, Rosie, but this is really important! I think I'm losing my mind here and you're the only one who can make me believe I'm sane. Please!!!" It was the please that did it.

"Alright, I'll come in but you better not be fooling around!" I huffed as I wiped my hands on a rag and followed him back into the house.

Emmett had bent down to pick up the remote and handed it to me. "Here, you try changing the channels. I tell you, the TV remote is not working but the channels were changing by themselves!"

I took the remote and pointed it at the TV, changing channels and making the TV volume go up and down. Emmett stared at me, an incredulous look on his face.

"I don't understand. I swear, that remote was not working!" I heard him repeating under his breath, "I'm not going crazy, I'm not going crazy."

_Oh my poor baby, you're not going crazy, not yet at least! _

"Emmett, I believe you, but the truth of the matter is the remote is working now. I think you need to get out of the house for a while. I have an idea. Why don't you take my M3 to the gas station? She needs her gas tank filled and while you're doing that I'll get cleaned up and when you get back we'll take the M3 for a drive, just you and me, okay?" I gave him a quick peck on the cheek and waited for him to respond.

"Yeah, that sounds good. Maybe I should get out of the house for a while." He started checking his pockets for his keys. "Where are my keys?"

"Just take mine." I smiled at him as he took the keys from my hand.

"What would I do without you, Rosie? You're always there for me, always watching my back." He had pulled me into a tight hug and I felt a pang of guilt he said I always watched his back, but then I remembered why we were doing this: to teach him a lesson.

"That's right sweetie, I'm always watching your back even when it doesn't feel like it. You know that everything I do is for your own good, don't you?"

"I know, Rosie, I know. I'll be back shortly." He gave me a quick kiss before running out to the garage. I heard him start the M3, pulling out of the garage and speeding down the driveway towards town.

The minute he was out of view I ran to one of the outbuildings and found Jasper waiting for me with Alice's Ducati. We were on our way to set up Prank #4.

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A/N: How did you like the first three pranks? Click on the button below and let me know. Pranks #4 and #5 are up next. Thanks!


	16. Operation Revenge Part 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Sixteen: Operation Revenge (Part 2)**

**Bella's POV**

The minute we heard Emmett take off in Rosalie's M3 we all started laughing. I couldn't believe how well this was going. I'd never seen the Cullens in action like this; it was brilliant! And to think I was now a part of this family.

I turned to Edward and Alice, who was currently rocking back and forth on her heels like she does when she's super-excited, and asked the both of them, "So, what's next?"

Edward only smiled. It was Alice who answered, "Oh, Bella, it's going to be brilliant! You know how Rosalie is about her M3, right? Emmett is the only one she trusts to drive her car. He knows how precious it is to her and he would never let anything happen to it…well, at least not willingly. With just two sentences on a piece of paper, we're going to make him think something has happened to the M3, without anything really happening to it."

"Are you serious?" I asked disbelievingly. How were they going to do that?

Edward answered, "Just watch love, you'll see. But first, I need to make a quick phone call to Emmett."

I watched as Edward pulled out his cell phone and called Emmett. "Emmett, it's Edward… Yeah, she's resting… No, she's not any worse but she says she's still feeling a bit lightheaded... Listen, Rosalie said you were taking her M3 to the gas station... There's a mini-mart across the street from the gas station. Do me a favor and pick up some orange juice and crackers for Bella. She's not hungry but I want her to at least keep drinking fluids… Yeah, just orange juice and crackers… I checked the kitchen and we're out of both… Okay, thanks, I appreciate it."

As soon as Edward ended the call I asked him, "A diversion, Edward? Get Emmett away from the M3 for a few minutes while a super fast Cullen commits the dastardly deed?"

"That's right, love. _Rosalie_ is going to be the Cullen committing the "dastardly deed." There will be no damage to her car, but the note Emmett finds on the windshield is guaranteed to send him into a state of panic, the likes of which we haven't see in decades, am I right Alice?"

Alice started nodding excitedly. "It's going to be perfect. He will be so scared to face Rosalie!"

I started to imagine the look on Emmett's face when he realized he had to tell Rosalie something had happened to her beloved M3. Too funny!

Alice sat down next to me. "Jasper will be there filming the whole thing with a remote video surveillance camera so we'll be able to watch it on the monitors here."

Excellent!

**Emmett's POV**

Rosie was right; I just needed to get out of the house for a while. I could feel my head starting to clear as I rolled down the windows and let the wind flow through the car. I was just pulling into the gas station when my cell phone rang. I saw it was Edward calling. _Please don't let it be anything involving Bella! _I thought to myself as I quickly answered.

"Edward… Is Bella okay? She's not feeling worse, is she? Yeah, that's right, Rosalie asked me to gas up the M3… You want me to go the mini mart across the street and pick up orange juice and crackers for Bella? Yeah, sure, no problem…"

Ending the call I got out of the car and started to fill the M3's gas tank. Once finished I locked the doors and quickly jogged across the street to the mini-mart to pick up the orange juice and crackers.

If I had known what was going to happen next I would have never left the car.

**Jasper's POV**

We hid the Ducati's in some brush about 100 yards from the gas station and mini-mart, not wanting Emmett to see them. I found the perfect vantage point in a tree not 20 yards from where the M3 was parked and got ready to start filming Prank #4. At this range I would be able to pick up every look, word, and sound that Emmett made!

Rosalie made her way to the back of the gas station, waiting for Emmett to run across the street to the mini-mart. The moment he was inside and out of view, Rosalie ran around to the front of the M3 and placed small piece of yellow colored paper under the driver's side windshield wiper. This innocent looking piece of paper contained only two sentences, including a name and phone number, but it was guaranteed to get a reaction out of Emmett. Rosalie quickly ran from the car and climbed up the tree where I was hiding with the video camera. We got ready to watch the action unfold.

**Rosalie's POV**

When Alice first approached me about using my M3 in one of the pranks, my first thought was "NO WAY." I imagined scenes where my beautiful car had been broadsided, or hit from behind and resembling an accordion. I wouldn't let anyone do that to my baby! But when she explained her idea I changed my mind.

Jasper and I had hidden the bikes in some bushes about 100 yards from the gas station, not wanting Emmett to catch sight of us. Jasper had found a good vantage point in a tree about 20 yards from where the M3 was parked and as he positioned himself to start filming I quickly ran to the back of the gas station, waiting for Emmett to run across the street to the mini-mart as per the plan.

I saw him lock the car doors _(good boy!)_ and then jog across the street. Once he was inside the store I ran around to the front of my car and placed a small piece of yellow colored paper under the driver's side windshield wiper where Emmett would easily spot it. On it were just two sentences with a name and phone number. I couldn't believe how brilliant it was. So simple, yet Emmett was going to panic when he read the note. I quickly ran from the car towards Jasper's hiding spot and positioned myself so that I could watch everything unfold.

**Emmett's POV**

I was in a rush to get back to Rosalie so I quickly paid for my purchases, heading back across the street to where Rosie's M3 was still parked. As I got closer to the car I noticed there was a small piece of yellow paper under the driver's side windshield wiper and after tossing the grocery bag inside the car I lifted the wiper blade and pulled out a note with just two sentences that read:

_**Sorry about the dent. Call me so we can swap insurance information.**_

_**Mr. U. Binhad**_

_**(559) 441-4141**_

I did a double take and read the note again. As the sentences finally registered in my brain I knew I must have looked horrified. If I were human you would have seen the blood draining from my face. _HELL NO!_ _THIS IS NOT HAPPENING!_

I frantically circled the car, looking for the dent referred to in the note. I didn't see _anything_, but that wouldn't matter because this is Rosalie we're talking about and she can SMELL a scratch on her baby. She would spot the dent the second I pulled into the driveway and then she would kill ME!

I kept running around the car, bending down, standing up, and checking again from all angles. _WHERE IS THAT DENT? _I was starting to draw the attention of some of the local townspeople as they watched me running around the car. Even I could see what they were thinking: _Oy, look there. One of those reclusive Cullen's has finally lost it. Didn't I tell you it would be that big guy who would lose it first? _

_Why is this happening to me? Why??? _I knew I was going into full panic mode here, but dammit, what else was I supposed to do? This car is Rosalie's baby, her pride and joy. I'm the only one she trusts to drive it.

_Come on Emmett, breathe! You've got to calm yourself down! Why can't I calm down? Oh, right, I have to face the wrath of my wife, the one person I NEVER want to make angry. Oh man, I'm dead!_

Not knowing what else to do I got back into the car and started driving back to the house. I was going to get the car back to the garage and pray that Rosalie would have mercy on me.

**Jasper's POV**

Okay, the other pranks were funny but this one topped them easily. _My wife is a genius! _Emmett was frantically running around the car, looking for the dent referred to in the note. _Sorry you're not going to find it, bro. _I'd never seen him in such a state of panic. It was time to amplify the feeling. A pinch of panic, a dash of hysteria… and presto! Vampire on the verge of a breakdown.

Did I mention my wife is a genius?

As soon as Emmett got back into the car and headed home, Rosalie and I jumped out of the tree and ran for the bikes. Rosalie was on her way back home while I was heading towards the scene of the 5th and final prank of the day. I'd hired some professional actors to play a part in the next prank and they were going to be filming some of the action in a way that wouldn't make Emmett suspicious, but would be highly entertaining for us!

I threw my head back, laughing as I sped off on the Ducati.

**Rosalie's POV**

Jasper and I were watching as Emmett read the note. You could see the panic start to set in as he ran around the car looking for a non-existent dent!

I had been concerned about the name we used on the note but Alice said Emmett wouldn't catch the play on the name: Mr. U. Binhad = Mr. You've Been Had.

Jasper and I were trying hard to not laugh, but this really was the funniest thing I'd seen in a long time. Emmett would never, ever again disregard anything I said. All I would have to say is "Prank #4" and he'd be walking the straight and narrow line for the next century. Oh this was good!

As soon as Emmett got in the car and started on his way back home, we jumped out of the tree and ran for the bikes. Jasper sped off towards the scene of the 5th and final prank of the day while I went straight home. I wasn't concerned with making it back to the house before Emmett. I know my husband and he _never _confesses to anything right away. He would be hiding out in the garage for a while, trying to work up the nerve to come into the house to face the music. And I would patiently wait.

**Edward's POV**

It was a good thing only Esme, Alice, Bella and I were the only ones in the house because it would have been impossible to keep Emmett from hearing our laughter. Even Esme was clutching her sides, laughing as hard as I'd ever seen her laugh while Alice and Bella were doing the same on the bed. Tears were running down Bella's cheeks and for some reason this set us off even more.

Hearing Bella's laugh is my second most favorite sound in the world (I'll let you guess at the first). She sounded so happy and it was in this moment I realized I was happy that I didn't destroy Emmett as had been my original intention when I returned to Forks. This was much better! We were going to hold this over his head for decades to come. And it was going to buy my Bella a break from Emmett's never ending teasing and pranks, at least until after she'd been changed. I had no doubt in my mind she would be able to handle him when the time came, but I was extremely pleased that we were helping her exact some revenge now instead of waiting until after the change.

"Alice, that was absolutely brilliant!" Bella said, sitting up on the bed as I reached over to wipe the tears from her eyes. "Mr. U. Binhad! I can't believe he didn't get that one! Did you see the look on his face when he got to the word "dent" in the note? And then he started running around the car looking for it!" That set Bella off on a new round of laughter which the rest of us gladly joined in.

Alice sat up on the bed, bouncing on her knees. "I know! I wish I could take credit for the idea but it was one I saw on the internet when I was trying to come up with ideas for practical jokes to play on Emmett. The only thing I added was the name of our other party. Emmett's going to beat himself over the head when he realizes the note basically confirmed he was being pranked! Seriously, Mr. U. Binhad!"

Esme congratulated Alice on the success of Prank #4. "That was truly inspired, Alice. I can't remember when I've laughed as much as I did this past half hour. I'm going to phone Carlisle and tell him about it. Even _he _won't be able to keep himself from laughing when he hears this one!" Esme gave Bella and Alice a quick hug and left the room to call Carlisle.

"Okay, sister of mine. Are we all set for Prank #5?" I asked Alice who was still giggling with Bella.

"Ready to go when you are!"

Bella moved to sit on my lap. "Is this the one where Charlie gets to play his part?" Her eyes were sparkling, from the tears or from anticipation I couldn't tell. What I did know was that she was happy, and that was good enough for me.

"Yes, my love, it's time for Charlie to take center stage. Would you do the honors?" I asked as I handed her my cell phone so she could phone her dad. She quickly dialed his work number.

"Hello, Dad? Yes, we just pulled off the 4th prank and it was a success. I've never laughed so hard. I can't wait for you to see the video!" She paused as Charlie started speaking on the other end. "Edward asked me to let you know that your part is coming up. You know the plan, right? As soon as they get the Jeep to the agreed upon place Alice will call you to let you know when to head down there, okay?"

I listened as Charlie asked her a couple of additional questions before she handed the phone to me. "Yes, Charlie, we're getting ready to roll... Alice will call you when we're ready for you to show up… Oh, don't be surprised if you see other "professionals" at the scene. It's all part of the plan. Just play along with whatever they say, okay? You'll understand once you see them… Yes, sir, will do."

I put the phone back in my pocket before turning to Bella. "Your dad says he's glad this is working out so well and that he wants me to keep you out of harms way." I had to laugh at the little glare she gave me as I passed along the message. _Ah, Bella, you don't realize how irresistible you look when you're irritated or angry. It's all I can do to keep myself from running you up to our room and having my way with you! _I satisfied myself with one kiss to the lips instead. "You know he just wants to make sure you're safe, Bella."

I stood up and turned towards my sister. "Alice, do you have the photos and the letter?"

Alice jumped up and started heading for the door. "I've got everything right here in my hands. Let's go!"

Bella stood up and put her arms around my waist, placing her head on my chest. "Are you sure I can't come with you? I can help."

I held her tight to me. "Sweetheart, I need you to stay here. Remember, Emmett needs to think you're here at the house and not feeling well. We still have the 6th and final prank to act out and it's the most important one." I loosened my arms and leaned back so I could look her in the eyes. "Besides, you once accused me of driving like a maniac and that's the way I'm going to be driving this afternoon. Are you really that anxious to be sick? It wouldn't be the same as my "dazzling technique" that helped you get into your role this morning, would it?"

Just as I hoped, Bella started laughing again. "No, I think I prefer your "dazzling technique" for getting me into the mood." She blushed as she realized the double meaning of her sentence. I just laughed, happy to see her relaxed and having fun.

"Don't worry, Bella," I said, kissing the top of her nose. "We'll be back before you know it. And don't forget, you won't miss any of the action because Jasper's still going to be filming and you'll be able to watch it on the monitors."

Bella looked puzzled. "I thought Jasper wasn't going to be filming this one."

"He'll be filming Emmett's arrival at the agreed upon location until your dad arrives at the "crime scene." Jasper's hired some professional actors to play a part. When they arrive on the scene they'll start filming your dad and Emmett in a way that won't make Emmett suspicious. Then Jasper will finish filming the end of the prank. Once your father is finished playing his part, Alice and I will bring the Jeep back to the house and then we'll start setting up for the final prank." I watched as Bella took it all in and then I quickly leaned down to kiss her. "The sooner we do this, the sooner I can have you back in my arms where you belong."

Alice and I headed towards the garage. It was time for the Jeep to disappear before Emmett returned with Rosalie's M3. Alice and I had decided that the 5th prank was going to be different from the others. It was going to be the only prank where Emmett was going to know he was being pranked. We wanted Emmett to know who it was that was going to beat the King of Pranks at his own game.

I jumped into the Jeep, backing it out of its spot while Alice left in its place a plain white envelope addressed to Emmett. Alice hopped into the Jeep and I raced towards the back of the property to a little used trail that would take me back to the main road without coming across Emmett when he returned the house. The trail was extremely narrow and treacherous. Only an off-road vehicle like Emmett's Jeep could make it through the terrain. We reached the main road and I sped off in the opposite direction of where Emmett would be coming. We had a prank to set up and we had to hurry before Emmett started chasing us down.

**Charlie's POV**

Bella had just phoned to let me know that the 4th prank had been a success and it was almost time for me to play my part.

She sounded so relaxed and happy. I could hear the laughter in her voice and when she told me she had never laughed so hard I couldn't hold back the big smile that appeared on my face. I loved that my kid was happy, that she was having fun, and that her ordeal was turning into something that she would be able to laugh about for a long time. And I had Edward and Alice to thank for it. Yes, the Cullens were good for her. I couldn't ask for a better family for my daughter.

I asked her to put Edward on the phone so I could ask a few questions. "Edward, is everyone ready to roll?" He confirmed everything was set and that Alice would call when it was time for me to arrive on the scene. Then he said, "Oh, don't be surprised if you see other "professionals" at the scene. It's all part of the plan. Just play along with whatever they say, okay? You'll understand once you see them…"

_What the hell did that mean?_ I hated surprises as much as Bella did, but she trusted Edward completely. I realized I was starting to trust my future son-in-law as well.

"Alright Edward, I'll play along. I trust you. Just do me a favor, would you? Keep Bella out of harms way."

I heard Edward laugh on the other end as he said, "Yes, sir, will do," before ending the call.

_Okay, Charlie Swan, your moment is close at hand. Time to show the kids you've still got what it takes! _

**Emmett's POV**

This had to be the worst day of my vampire life. How could one person have this much bad luck in one day? Wait…I take that back. _Bella _could have this much bad luck in one day and it would still be considered a normal day in her life. Let me rephrase: How could a _vampire _have this much bad luck in one day?

I pulled into the driveway and headed towards the garage, wondering how I was going to break the news to Rosalie. The yellow note was still in my hand, my only proof that it wasn't me who had caused damage to her car. I was going to hang out in the garage for a while and try to work up the nerve to go inside and face the music.

All thoughts of facing the music flew out the window the moment I pulled into the garage and noticed that my Jeep was missing. _What the hell?_ _How much worse could this day get? _

I jumped out of Rosalie's car and ran to the spot where my Jeep was normally parked. In its place was a plain white envelope with my name written on it. _Oh, man this is not going to be good. _Opening the letter I removed two items. The first was a letter which read:

_**Emmett,**_

_**You thought you would get off easy, didn't you? That I'd let you off the hook without making you pay? **_

_**Do you remember what I said to you in the hospital when Alice and Jasper kept me from dealing with you the way I wanted to in that moment? I said, "Soon Emmett, very soon…" Well, my brother, "soon" has arrived.**_

_**You had your "harmless" fun at the expense of something very precious to me and now I'm more than happy to return the favor, with the assistance of our favorite sister.**_

_**It's time to play "Let's Find Emmett's Jeep." It's quite simple. Attached is a photo of your Jeep. It's your job to find its current location based on the landmarks in the photo. You have exactly 4 hours to retrieve your vehicle and return it to the Cullen garage without being detected by any outside parties. If you should fail to retrieve and safely deliver the Jeep within the allotted 4 hour time frame, again without outside detection, the winner (that's us) gets to determine an appropriate form of punishment of their choosing. **_

_**Your 4 hours starts at exactly 1:00 P.M. today.**_

_**May the best vampire win…trust me, it won't be you!**_

_**Edward **_

_I don't fricking believe this! They stole my Jeep and now I have to find it and return it to the garage within 4 hours or suffer a punishment of their choosing? Are they crazy? Do they know who they're dealing with? I'm the King of Pranks!_

And just like that I forgot about this morning, forgot about Rosalie's M3 and the dent I couldn't find. There was no way anyone could prank me without me knowing it, just like there was no way they would beat me at MY game!

I looked at the clock in the garage which currently read 12:58 p.m. The second item in the envelope was a photo of my Jeep. Looking at the photo I noticed the landmarks in the background. Ha! My Jeep is at Forks High. What do they take me for, an idiot? This was going to be so easy. Taking off on foot I made my way to Forks High, ready to show those two who the master of this game was…ME!

When I arrived at the high school I realized this might not be as easy as I thought. I looked at the photo again…I'm in the right spot, but no Jeep. There was another envelope placed in the spot where the Jeep had been photographed. I tore open the envelope which contained another letter and photo. The letter read:

_**Hey Emmett,**_

_**It's your favorite sister here. Did you honestly think we'd make it that easy for you to find the Jeep? If it were MY choice I would have had you running all the way up to Denali and back, but since we've given you just 4 hours to complete the task I was forced to keep it within the area. **_

_**Enclosed is another photo of your Jeep, this time at its most current location. Take a good look at the photo. You'd better hurry; you don't want to take too long. Who knows how long your Jeep wants to stay put?**_

_**Have a nice run!**_

_**Your sister,**_

_**Alice**_

_Have a nice run? _I looked at the photo. The Jeep was parked in front of Bella Italia in Port Angeles - the scene of Bella and Edward's first "date." It was a 56 mile drive from Forks, but of course to a vampire on foot I'd be there in a flash. Off I went, hoping to get there before Edward and Alice moved the Jeep again. No such luck! The Jeep was gone and in its place another photo. This photo showed the Jeep in the parking lot of Newton's Olympic Outfitters.

Glancing at my wristwatch I saw that it was almost 3:30 p.m. I needed to hurry. It was getting close to the 5:00 p.m. deadline and I was not going to be the loser! I raced back to Forks and Olympic Outfitters.

**Charlie's POV**

This was it. Alice had just phoned to let me know Emmett had arrived at Olympic Outfitters parking lot and was currently trying to pick the lock on his Jeep.

Jasper Cullen had hired an actor to portray my "assistant deputy." Unless you looked closely you wouldn't be able to tell that his "patrol car" was not officially a Forks Police Dept. patrol car, nor was his uniform or badge. I had been very specific with Jasper, telling him that although I was willing to take part in this prank I didn't want to compromise any of my people by having them involved. He had quickly agreed and assured me the actor would only look the part and that he would say or do nothing that would compromise the department. And he was true to his word. The actor was currently sitting in his "patrol car" waiting for my signal. I nodded at him and jumped into my cruiser, the other "patrol car" following close behind me. As I got closer to Olympic Outfitters I turned the sirens on and raced into the parking lot. Emmett Cullen, here I come!

**Emmett's POV**

Eureka! I had just arrived at the Olympic Outfitter's parking lot where my Jeep was sitting all by itself, Edward and Alice nowhere in sight. HA! They're probably trying to come up with another spot to hide the Jeep. Won't they be surprised when THEY find the Jeep missing? Teach them to mess with the King of Pranks! I'd have it back to the garage in no time!

I ran to the Jeep and reached for the door handle. Oh man! Locked! And I didn't have my keys on me since I'd been using Rosalie's keys when I returned to the house. It was bad enough I still had to explain that unseen dent described in the note, but to add to that by destroying the door lock on my Jeep would put her over the top. I was going to have to pick the lock instead. I'd had plenty of experience with this over the years so it would be a piece of cake, and there was no one around so I wouldn't draw any suspicions, as long as I played it cool.

I pulled a small pin out of my wallet and started jimmying the lock until I heard a little "click" telling me it had unlocked. I was feeling pretty good about my talents but before I could pat myself on the back I heard sirens in the background and they were getting closer. Much closer… This can't be good. Before I had time to decide whether or not to just get the hell away from the Jeep, two patrol cars came screeching to a halt about 20 feet away. _Oh crap! _I said to myself. _Please don't let it be who I think it is, please, please, please…_

This has got to be the unluckiest day ever for me! Charlie Swan, father of my soon to be sister, the man who looked at me as if I were the replacement for the hated Edward of old. _I am so screwed…_

_Okay, I'm a Cullen. I can do this. I've B.S.'d my way out tight spots before. Just be cool; I can do this. _

Charlie ran around the Jeep to where I was standing and yelled, "You, step away from the vehicle! Turn around and put your hands in the air where I can see them!"

I turned slowly, hands in the air, and faced Charlie. "Hey, Charlie…I can explain." I said with a sheepish look on my face. If I thought that line and look were going to get me anywhere, I was wrong.

"Well, well, well. Emmett Cullen. You've been a busy person of late, haven't you? You spend the weekend terrorizing my daughter, sending her to the hospital emergency room and now it looks like we can add grand theft auto to the list. What a lucky break for me that I happen to be on duty today, but not so lucky for you I would say." Charlie had an evil grin on his face, like Christmas had just arrived and he'd gotten his Christmas wish. _Yes, I was so up a creek without a paddle._

"Charlie, I can explain all of this. This is MY Jeep, you know that. You've seen me in it before!" I said, still trying to talk my way out of the situation.

"First of all, I think you'd better refer to me as Chief Swan. This is an official investigation and we have found you at the scene of a crime. Second, you'd better think long and hard about what you want to say because this could land you in a heap of trouble for a very long time!"

At that moment the assistant deputy came round to where we were standing. "Sir, I checked the vehicle. It looks like someone picked the door lock to open it. Also, the license plate is missing as is the vehicle registration. The vehicle matches the description of given by a tourist who reported the theft of his Jeep as he was passing through town," said the deputy. _Oh man, I am screwed…_

"Charlie… Chief Swan. I swear this is my vehicle. I didn't steal it. My family is playing a prank on me, to get back at me for what I did to Bella. You've got to believe me. It's Alice and Edward; they're the ones who set me up!" I was trying to convince Charlie but the man didn't even blink.

"Well, young man, if this is your vehicle where are your keys? Why are the license plate and registration missing?" Charlie asked.

_Damn! _

"Ah…I don't have my keys on me, they're at home. But this is my vehicle. I don't know how the license plate and registration were taken from the Jeep, but I'm telling you this vehicle is mine!" I said as I continued trying to convince Charlie of my innocence.

Charlie was having none of it. "You know, when you try to pin the blame on someone as nice as your sister Alice, or your brother Edward who would defend you with his last breath…well that's just sick. You can tell it to a judge. I'm placing you under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?"

I couldn't believe it; Bella's father was reading me my Miranda rights! My Miranda rights! He was arresting me! I looked on in total disbelief as he placed my wrists in cuffs and started steering me towards the patrol car.

_God, Carlisle is going to kill me!_ There was no way I could get out of this without making the situation worse. _Just go along with it, _I said to myself. _Just cooperate and Carlisle will clear this mess up. It can't get any worse._

Oh man, spoke too soon again! It did get worse. As we got closer to Charlie's patrol car a vehicle came screeching to a stop in the parking lot, and I watched with a horrified expression on my face as it became apparent this wasn't just any vehicle. It was a _television news van _and there was a reporter running up to us with a cameraman hot on her heels. Microphone in hand she was already speaking to the camera in a British accent.

"This is Rita Skeeter, special correspondent for News America, live at the scene of an arrest in progress in the small town of Forks, WA. According to police frequency scanners I've learned that the person apprehended may be a possible suspect in a rash of vehicle thefts reported by tourists visiting the Olympic Peninsula area? Sir, sir, please. May I have your name and a comment?" said the reporter addressing Charlie.

Charlie replied to the reporter without breaking stride as he led me to the patrol car. "My name is Charlie Swan and I'm the Chief of Police in this town. I can confirm this person is a suspect and we are taking him in for questioning. He was apprehended while in the process of trying to enter this vehicle behind me. The vehicle's license plate and registration are missing, but it appears to be the same vehicle stolen from a tourist passing through our town, a Mr. U. Binhad. It's our duty as responsible law enforcement officials to see that this case is investigated to the fullest." Charlie replied, looking in my direction as he led me to the cruiser.

_Holy crap! Mr. U. Binhad? That was the guy who left the note on Rosalie's M3! _

The Skeeter lady turned to me and asked, "Sir, are you the perpetrator of these crimes? What have you to say about the very serious charges which have been leveled against you?"

"I say that I am 100% innocent. That is my vehicle. I didn't take it, it was taken from ME and I've been trying to chase it down all day long!" I said, desperately trying to proclaim my innocence.

Rita Skeeter turned back to Charlie for his response. "Chief Swan, how do you respond to that?"

"Yes, well isn't that what they all say? The suspect will have his day in court and then we'll see if he's telling the truth or not. I hope for his parent's sake it's not true. They are very well respected and prominent citizens in our community and it would be a shame if their son has decided to walk a different path than his parents," said Charlie.

"Well, thank you very much, Chief Swan, for your comments. And good luck to you young man. This is Rita Skeeter reporting from Forks, WA. Now back to the studio."

Rita Skeeter turned to Charlie. "Thank you again, Chief Swan. We've got to rush if this is going to make the national news tonight! What a story!"

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! I don't believe this! National television! What would happen if the Volturi find out? Scratch that, what happens when Rosalie gets wind of it? She's going to kill me herself! We're going to have to disappear! Edward's going to kill me because he'll have to change Bella right away. She won't have time to say her goodbyes! This was turning into a nightmare and I wanted to wake up!

Charlie placed me in the backseat of the cruiser and shut the door. As we drove off to the police station, all I could think was _I get one phone call, I get one phone call. _And I knew who I would be calling to help me out of this mess. The only one who could help me: Carlisle.

**Carlisle's POV**

It was almost time. Esme had called me earlier to describe how the first four pranks had gone. It's a good thing the door to my office was closed because I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard. Emmett was getting it good. I had no doubt in my mind that once this was over, he was going to out of the pranking business for a while.

I sat back as I waited for the next phone call. The call from Emmett asking me to come bail him out of jail.

**Jasper's POV**

I had just one word to describe the events that had just unfolded before my eyes: WICKED. Edward and Alice had left the Jeep in the parking lot of Olympic Outfitters and made their way over to my hiding spot as we watched Emmett run up to the Jeep and start picking the lock. The look on his face when Charlie pulled up and started grilling him was hilarious. And then when the "news crew" arrived and started filming the arrest, we could barely contain our laughter. I didn't have to induce panic or any other emotion where Emmett was concerned. He did it all on his own. We had to duck down when Charlie's patrol car passed near the spot where we were hiding. Once they had passed we came out of our hiding spot and ran across the street to where the "news crew" was waiting for us, tape in hand.

"That was fantastic, well done!" I was very pleased with their work and let them know it.

"Thank you, Mr. Cullen. I'm glad you were pleased with our performance," said "Rita Skeeter" as she handed me the tape. Rita Skeeter was a name I had chosen from the Harry Potter books. It seems we Cullens were all determined to use a name or play on name that should have let Emmett know something was going on.

Alice was still laughing. "Oh, we're beyond pleased. That was truly one of the best performances I've ever witnessed. Emmett was totally blindsided by Charlie and then when your crew came on the scene, well, you pulled off the impossible. Our brother was speechless!"

That set off another round of laughter as we thanked them again and I discreetly handed the actress a thick envelope containing their fee plus a very, very large bonus for the excellent job.

Edward put the license plates back on the Jeep while Alice returned the vehicle registration papers to the glove compartment. Edward started the Jeep and headed back to the house, with Alice and me following behind on the Ducati.

This had been the best day ever for the Cullens. Too bad Emmett couldn't say the same!

**Charlie's POV**

We arrived at the police station and I opened the back door of the patrol car to help Emmett out of the car. He seemed unusually subdued and had been very quiet on the way to the station. I smiled to myself as I escorted him to the booking area where my "assistant deputy" was at the typewriter, ready to complete the paperwork.

I sat him in the chair opposite my "assistant" and started asking the usual questions: his full name, his age, etc. Once that was done I took the mug shots and fingerprinted him, and then handed him a list of the charges including bail amount and informed him he was allowed one phone call.

I went back to my desk as Emmett was handed the phone by my assistant so that he could make his phone call. I already knew who he'd be calling: his father, Carlisle Cullen.

**Carlisle's POV**

Ah, the phone call I'd been waiting for. I picked up the phone receiver on the second ring. "This is Dr. Cullen, how can I help you?"

I heard Emmett's voice on the line. "Carlisle, it's Emmett. I need your help. I'm at the police station right now. I need you to come down as soon as possible."

Here we go. "Emmett, may I ask what you're doing at the police station?"

I didn't have to wait long for an answer. "Carlisle, I've been arrested for breaking into a vehicle, my own, and possible grand theft auto! I'm innocent but Charlie still hauled me down to the station. "

I could hear the strain in Emmett's voice and it was all I could do not to laugh. After a short pause I spoke into the phone again. "Your mother and I will be there shortly. Don't answer any questions until we get there, do you understand?"

I could hear the relief in Emmett's voice as he replied, "Yes, Carlisle, I understand. Thank you!"

I hung up the phone and started laughing. When I could control myself I called Esme. "Sweetheart, I need you to meet me at the police station. It seems Charlie Swan has arrested our son!"

"You're joking, Carlisle," was Esme's response. "Why would Charlie Swan arrest our son? He's an angel." I could hear laughter in the background and knew our children were listening in on the conversation, which threatened to set me off again.

"Esme, stop or I won't be able to pull this off. Seriously, meet me at the police station. We've got to "bail" our son out of jail."

With that I hung up the phone and went to the nurses' station to let them know that I would be leaving early to attend to some personal matters. This was definitely turning into a day that none of the Cullens would ever forget.

**Esme's POV**

I walked into Alice's room where Bella and Rosalie were sitting. I could see the two of them had been laughing, telltale tears in Bella's eyes and Rosalie holding her stomach. Behind me I heard Alice, Jasper and Edward making their way up the stairs, also laughing. Bella flew to Edward, who held out his arms and picked up her, twirling her in the air. "What did you think, love? What do you think of Cullen-style revenge?"

Bella's eyes were shining. "I love it! I have never seen anything so funny in my life. The look on Emmett's face when my father arrived on the scene! Sorry Rosalie, but you have to admit it was funny!"

Rosalie just smiled. "I never said it wasn't, Bella. In fact, I think it's one of the funniest things I've seen in all my years, even it was my own husband!"

My cell phone started ringing and everyone quickly stopped laughing. I looked at the caller ID. I mouthed "Carlisle" to the room and opened the phone, putting him on speakerphone so Bella would be able to listen in on the conversation. "Yes, dear?"

"Sweetheart, I need you to meet me at the police station. It seems Charlie Swan has arrested our son!"

"You're joking, Carlisle," I replied, sounding as if I were shocked he would even suggest such a thing. "Why would Charlie Swan arrest our son? He's an angel." Everyone burst into laughter, no longer trying to keep it in.

I knew Carlisle would be having a hard time as well, which he confirmed when he said, "Esme, stop or I won't be able to pull this off. Seriously, meet me at the police station. We've got to "bail" our son out of jail." He quickly ended the call and I turned to face my children.

"Well, children, I'm off to meet your father at the station. It's time to free our poor little Emmett," I said, setting off another round of laughter.

I quickly made my way to the car and drove to the Forks Police Department to meet Carlisle.

* * *

A/N: Poor Emmett! Do you think he's had enough? I don't think so! Hehehe. Seriously, I love Emmett. Who doesn't? He can take it, otherwise I wouldn't have let the family torture him so. :-D

Next up, Emmett's release from jail and the final prank. For all you Harry Potter fans, yes, I shamelessly borrowed the infamous "Rita Skeeter" character as our British reporter looking for the big scoop. She hasn't been able to find work in Britain and is now working for a Muggle news agency in America. Sorry, I couldn't resist! The character Rita Skeeter was created by J.K. Rowling and belongs to her.

Let me what you thought of this chapter!


	17. The Interrogation of Emmett Cullen

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

A/N: Sorry for the delay! Hope you enjoy Charlie's interrogation of Emmett Cullen

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen: The Interrogation of Emmett Cullen**

**Charlie's POV**

Ah, revenge…such a sweet thing. The fifth prank had gone better than expected and now I was sitting at my desk with one Emmett Cullen in "custody." To borrow a word used by kids nowadays…sweet.

I wasn't finished with Cullen yet. No way. You can't get hauled down to a police station and not go through the WHOLE experience, which is what we were doing now. Emmett had been booked, fingerprinted and had his mug shots taken. He'd been given the list of charges including bail amount. I'd even let him have his one phone call. Now he was sitting in a holding cell, trying his best to avoid catching my eye. I was giving him some time to think about things…and time to worry if he had anything more to worry about. I had something special planned for Cullen. Anyone brought down to the station has to go through one last thing before Charlie Swan will allow them to walk: INTERROGATION!

There was one other reason for letting Cullen sweat it out in the holding cell: it was making for great television! Only Jasper, Alice and I knew that Jasper had hired a professional cameraman to video record the action at the station. Last night I'd met Alice and Jasper here at the station so they could set up hidden cameras that would be remote operated from a small office around the corner from my desk. The cameraman had arrived earlier in the day and had recorded all the action thus far, from our arrival at the station to the "booking in" process and his current situation in the holding cell. It was going to be a surprise for Bella and the others, Jasper said, from him and Alice. I couldn't wait to see everything on tape. Bella was going to love it.

**Cameraman's POV**

I was on vacation outside of Seattle when my agent called about some guy needing a professional cameraman to record a prank worthy of 'Punk'd.' I wouldn't have considered it except my agent said the guy was offering a huge amount of money and who am I to turn down extra money in this day and age?

Man, am I glad I took this gig! I've filmed some great pranks, but this stuff…it's the funniest material I've ever filmed outside of 'Punk'd!' Ashton Kutcher could pick up a few ideas from these guys.

I don't know who this Cullen guy crossed to deserve what was going to happen shortly. All I can say is I'm glad I'm not in his shoes! Whoever he crossed was going to own him for a long time!

_Hmm, maybe I should mention this to Ashton when I get back to L.A. I'll have to talk to that Jasper Cullen later._

**Emmett's POV**

I don't believe it! This day has turned into a nightmare I can't wake from! How much more can I take? Wasn't it enough to think I was losing my mind this morning? Wasn't it enough that some tourist put a ding in Rosalie's car, a ding I have yet to find let alone explain? Wasn't it enough I spent the entire afternoon chasing my Jeep all over the peninsula in a revenge plot engineered by Edward and Alice? Wasn't it enough Charlie Swan had to be the one to bust me, or that the arrest was filmed by a national news program and they were planning to air it on TV tonight? Oh no, the fun didn't stop there. Charlie had to haul me down to the station and make me go through the WHOLE process: booking, fingerprints, and mug shots!

You would think this would be more than enough humiliation to suffer. WRONG! No, I get placed in a holding cell like any other common criminal! Here I was, sitting on a bench, the following tune running through my head: _Nobody knows the trouble I've seen…nobody knows my sorrow._

_Where is Carlisle? What is taking him so long?_ I asked myself. For god sake, he's a vampire! He should have been here by now! He's my only hope for escaping the hellhole I find myself trapped in. Charlie likes and respects Carlisle and I hoped it would be enough to free my sorry you-know-what!

I ran my hands through my hair and leaned my head against the wall, closing my eyes as I went over in my head all the events of the day. Let's see. Started the day playing video games and I was ending it inside a holding cell. I still couldn't figure out what the hell had happened! _When did I become the unluckiest vampire on the face of this planet? In pranking Bella had I gone too far in my search for a good laugh? Was it bad karma come back to haunt me? _

_This was embarrassing! _I wasn't looking forward to going home. Not only would I have to face the teasing from my siblings, but I was going to have to submit to whatever punishment Edward and Alice had planned for me since I hadn't returned the Jeep to the house within the 4 hour time frame, without detection by an outside party.

I opened one eye and could see Charlie sitting in his chair, legs propped up on the desk with his hands behind his head and a smug smile on his face as he watched me.

_Why does he keep doing that? _It was starting to make nervous; it was putting me on edge! A human making a vampire nervous…isn't that ironic?

I'm trying to stay calm, cool and relaxed but Charlie's making me crazy! He's got something more planned for me, I know it! I don't know if I can handle anymore. _Someone please HELP ME…._

**Charlie's POV**

Hehehe… The intimidation tactics seem to be working. He's trying to play it cool but I can see the worry in his eyes! _What's the matter, Cullen? You think something else is going to happen? _You thought right. It was time to kick it up a notch. Next stop: the interrogation room.

I gave the hidden cameraman the prearranged signal that the action was going to start up again.

Standing up I walked towards the holding cell, making sure I jangled the keys good and loud before opening the cell door and stepping inside. "Well, Cullen, it seems we're not quite finished here. Let's go someplace where we can talk."

I took him by the arm and led him down the long, dark hallway to the interrogation room. I sat him at the table and pointed the light towards his face, not saying a word for a good five minutes.

_Okay, Cullen, time for some fun. Hope the cameras are catching this!_

**Cameraman's POV**

The chief just gave me the signal. It was time for Cullen's "interrogation." Oh, man, this is gonna be good! Cameras rolling!

**Emmett's POV**

_Oh no, Charlie's walking this way! _This is not going to be good, I just know it!

Charlie stopped in front of the cell door, jangling his keys. _Why does he keep doing that? _

"Well, Cullen, it seems we're not quite finished here. Let's go someplace where we can talk."

_Talk? What does he mean, "talk?"_ Suddenly the answer was as clear as a bell. OH NO! The holding cell was not the final humiliation. How could I have forgotten the one last thing they do when you're hauled to jail? I was going to be interrogated by Charlie Swan!

Before I knew it, Charlie had me by the arm and was leading me down what felt like the longest, darkest hallway I've ever walked, to a small room with darkened windows. He had me sit at a table with a bright light directed at my face, not saying a word for five whole minutes. _Was he trying to freak me out?_ Mission accomplished and another first! Vampire man freaked out by human man.

**Charlie's POV**

There is a German word, blitzkrieg, which translated means "lightning war" or "lightning attack." The Germans used this method of attack in World War II. There's a similar expression used in football. When the quarterback is suddenly charged by the defense through a gap in the line, it's called a blitz. Emmett Cullen was about to get blitzed.

"So, Cullen, are you ready to confess? The sooner you do, the sooner I might consider letting you go. Fail to cooperate and you might be here for a long time. It could be hours, or days, or even years. It's up to you. I don't want any lame stories, I just want the truth. Do you think you can handle that?" I leaned in towards him as I asked the questions. "What were you doing breaking into a vehicle that had been reported stolen?"

Yes, the fun was about to begin again!

**Emmett's POV**

When Charlie leaned in and asked if I was ready to confess, I knew I was screwed! He wasn't going to believe anything I said. I was going to be stuck here forever!

"Chief Swan, I didn't steal that vehicle. It's MY Jeep. My brother and sister were playing a prank on me, as payback for what I did to Bella this weekend. You can call Alice, or Edward. They can explain the whole thing."

Charlie snorted, "I may do that, Mr. Cullen, but the fact of the matter is YOU were caught picking the lock on a vehicle matching the description of a vehicle stolen from a tourist in the area. YOU were standing next to same vehicle missing its license plate and registration. Unless it can be proven without a doubt that the vehicle you picked the lock on is not the vehicle reported stolen by Mr. U. Binhad, I have no other choice but to keep you in custody!"

Charlie stepped back as I shook my head and answered, "Chief Swan, I'm telling you the truth. I don't know anything about that Mr. U. Binhad's vehicle, but I know my Jeep and that was my Jeep in the parking lot!"

Charlie wasn't having any of it. "If you're going to keep repeating that story we're going to be here for a long time, and I've got all the time in the world, young man. Save us both the grief!"

I remembered Carlisle's advice to not say anything until he arrived at the station, so I told Charlie, "Chief Swan, I don't think I should answer any more questions. I think we should stop."

I guess that was the wrong thing to say because Charlie's face turned red and he walked right up to me, slamming both hands down on the table right in front of me.

"We're not done here until I say we're done, Mr. Cullen! I'm going to ask the questions and whether or not you choose to answer them is up to you, but this is a matter of public record."

He looked like he was enjoying this! Of course he would be enjoying this. And then he started firing off question after question in rapid succession.

**Charlie:** "What were you doing at the scene of the crime?"

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

**Charlie:** "What did you do with the license place and vehicle registration?"

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

**Charlie:** "If this was your vehicle, where were your keys?"

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

**Charlie:** "How was it you had a pin in your possession, a pin that is designed to pick locks such as the one on the Jeep?"

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

**Charlie:** "Why should I believe your story when the evidence strongly suggests you are the suspect we've been looking for?"

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

**Charlie:** "Is there someone who can confirm your whereabouts during the hours of 12:00 p.m. and 4:30 p.m.?"

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

**Charlie:** "What were you doing last Saturday night?"

_Huh? What does that have to do with anything?_

**Me:** "I plead the Fifth."

Charlie kept firing off the questions and I kept pleading the Fifth. Finally, he seemed ready to give up on the interrogation.

"Well, Mr. Cullen, since you're unwilling to answer any questions I'm going to escort you back to the holding cell until your parents arrive. Maybe they'll be able to talk some sense in you!"

And just like that the interrogation was over. I'm sure I looked as if I were in a daze; it sure felt like I was in one! Charlie escorted me back to the holding cell. I sat back down on the bench and leaned my head against the wall. In football, if the quarterback is charged by a defensive backfield player through a gap in the line, it's called a blitz. Well, I was the quarterback, Charlie the defensive back, and I'd just been blitzed _and _sacked!

**Charlie's POV**

I had to hand it to Cullen. I thought he'd be sweating bullets, but he was cool as a cucumber. Only his eyes betrayed his worry.

I continued firing off question after question for another five minutes. Emmett remained silent, looking at the floor for the most part, his only words being, "I plead the fifth," in response to my questions. In a real interrogation I would have been highly annoyed at the suspect, but instead I only pretended to be highly irritated.

"Well, Mr. Cullen, since you are unwilling to answer any questions I'm going to escort you to a holding cell until your parents arrive." I couldn't tell if he looked relieved or if he was just in a daze. _Can't laugh now, Charlie, keep a straight face, _I kept telling myself as I motioned for him to stand and then led him off to the holding cell.

**Cameraman's POV**

I was laughing my ass off! That Cullen guy looked like he'd been blitzed! Man, I should be feeling sorry for the guy, but this was way too funny! I kept zooming in on his face each time Chief Swan would ask a question. _I plead the Fifth!_ HAHAHA…

**Carlisle's POV**

I pulled up to the police station not long after Emmett's call and waited in my car for Esme to arrive. She pulled up minutes later and got into my car. We didn't say anything out loud for fear Emmett would hear. No, that's not entirely true. We didn't want to start laughing and ruin the performance to come.

One of the things that Esme, Charlie, Edward and I had discussed yesterday afternoon at Charlie's house was that Esme and I should wait outside the station for about an hour after Emmett's call. Edward felt Charlie should make Emmett sweat a little, so to speak, by having him go through the whole booking process. Charlie said it would make the experience more realistic for Emmett and funnier for everyone else.

We'd been sitting quietly and the hour was almost up. "Are you ready, my dear?" I asked my wife.

Esme smiled. "I'm ready. Let's go free our son."

We entered the station and were spotted by Charlie who got up from his chair and walked towards us. He gestured towards a wall, indicating Emmett was on the other side and would be able to hear our conversation.

"Carlisle, Esme, it's a pleasure to see the two of you, although I wish it were under happier circumstances." Charlie said this with a wink.

I replied, "Yes, we agree as well, Charlie. There has to be a logical explanation for what happened this afternoon."

Esme added, "Charlie, we know our son and he's not the type of person who could commit the crime he's being accused of committing. Emmett has always been a good boy; he's never been in any type of trouble. He may be high spirited but he's never engaged in any criminal activity."

I nodded my head in agreement with my wife's statement. "Esme is right, Charlie. Emmett has no criminal history; he doesn't have a parking or traffic ticket on his record."

Charlie looked over at the wall, and pretended to be considering our comments. "Well, he did mention a prank being involved. But we've had a rash of vehicle thefts reported by tourists traveling in the area and your son was found picking the lock on a vehicle that matched the description of a Jeep reported stolen earlier in the day. The vehicle he was breaking into was missing its license plates and vehicle registration, two items that are always missing when a vehicle theft is involved. The whole thing might have been easily sorted if he'd had his keys on him, but he claimed they were at home. I can only go by what I see and the evidence is against him. I would be doing a disservice to this community if I didn't bring him in for questioning."

I nodded my head at Charlie. "Charlie, I agree that you have a responsibility to the investigate this, but believe our son is innocent and there has been a mistake." I paused. "Charlie, has anything new been reported in regards to the other theft?"

"Well, we're still waiting for some additional information from the other law enforcement agencies who are also involved in the investigation of vehicle thefts in their counties. I was hoping for some word this afternoon," Charlie replied.

Esme interrupted. "Charlie, may we speak to our son now?"

Charlie nodded and gestured for us to follow. "Sure, Esme. Please understand that we had to follow normal booking procedure so he's in a holding cell. I'm going to take you to the interrogation room and I'll have him brought in so you can speak with him."

"Thank you, Charlie," I said as we followed Charlie to a small room.

"No problem, Carlisle. My "deputy" will bring him in shortly." Charlie closed the door.

I reached for Esme's hand as we waited for Emmett to be brought to us.

**Emmett's POV**

Finally! Carlisle and Esme had arrived! I blew out a huge breath, relieved to hear Carlisle's voice telling Charlie there had to be a logical explanation what had happened this afternoon. Damn straight there was! I was innocent!

I heard Esme ask Charlie if they could speak with me. Charlie said he would take them to the interrogation room and have his deputy bring me to the room. I looked up to see the deputy who opened the cell door and led me back to the dark room where I came face to face with Carlisle and Esme.

Charlie spoke first. "Your parents wanted to have a word with you. I'll leave you to speak privately. You have 10 minutes," and then he left the room without another word.

Once the door had closed I turned to Carlisle. "Carlisle, thank you for coming to the station. This is all a huge misunderstanding! It was a prank! Edward and Alice took my Jeep as payback for what I did to Bella this weekend. They've had me running all over town, to Port Angeles and back and when I finally found my Jeep parked outside of Olympic Outfitters, the door was locked and I didn't have my keys on me so I picked the lock but Charlie and his deputy came and saw me by the Jeep and arrested me for breaking into the vehicle and grand theft auto!"

Carlisle started pinching the bridge of his nose, just like Edward does when he's trying to calm down. Scary.

"Emmett, you need to speak lower. It's safe to assume that there are cameras and microphones in this room picking up everything that we say. Most of the conversation should be just loud enough for the microphones to catch a few words here or there, but for the most part we have to keep our voices as low as possible. There are certain things that cannot be heard by the humans." I got his meaning. Anything related to vampires. He continued in a slightly louder voice, "I hope you understand the seriousness of the situation, Emmett. We believe you. In fact, Esme saw Edward and Alice at the house and they told her what they had done. The real problem is that Charlie says your vehicle, the one you were trying to get in, is an exact match of a Jeep reported stolen this morning from a tourist in the area. Without the license plate and registration, and your keys, Charlie can't confirm the vehicle is yours which makes it your word against the evidence he has gathered to date."

I interrupted at this point, taking care to speak in a low voice. "It's even worse, Carlisle. The tourist whose vehicle was allegedly stolen is the same person who left me a note saying he dented Rosalie's M3 when she sent me to the gas station to fill the tank! And then a news reporter pulled up when Charlie was placing me under arrest and she got the whole arrest on film! She was asking questions and once she got what she wanted she rushed off. She's going to make sure it's on national television tonight! What do we do?"

Esme reached across the table and squeezed my hand. "Carlisle, what are we going to do?"

Carlisle turned towards the window, his back to us. Taking a deep breath he slowly exhaled and turned back around to face us, again speaking too low for the microphones to pick up. "I'm not going to sugar-coat this. If this story makes the national news there is a very good chance the Volturi will see it. It hasn't been that long since the battle with the newborn army and this is attention we did not need!" Carlisle paused, sighing again. "Do you see what can happen when you don't think about the consequences of your pranks? Not only did Bella get hurt but you angered your brother and sister. You know how Edward is about Bella's safety, and Alice is just as protective. Couldn't you see they would never let you get away with something like this without retaliation? I don't approve of these games that all of you insist on playing, but I can't argue with Edward's right to avenge his mate in whatever way he saw fit. You're lucky to not be paying with your life."

I hung my head in shame. It was true. "I know, Carlisle. I should have considered the possible consequences, instead of just thinking about how much fun it would be to prank Bella. I am sorrier than I can say. I wish I could go back to last week when Edward asked me to join you guys on the hunting trip. I wish I'd never thought to prank her!"

Carlisle came back to the table and put his hand on my shoulder. "Son, I'm going to do everything I can to convince Charlie to let you go without pressing charges, but I think it's all going to depend on whether or not they can locate the real stolen vehicle. You need to prepare yourself for the possibility that charges will be filed."

_WHAT??? They can't do that! I'm innocent! _

Carlisle must have seen the look on my face because he quickly squeezed my shoulder and continued. "Emmett, calm down! I didn't say it was going to happen, just that you had to face the possibility. Now, did Charlie give you a list of charges or anything that mentioned bail?"

I'd forgotten all about the paper Charlie handed me after I had been booked. "Yes, yes! I have it in my pocket." I reached into my pocket and pulled out the paper and gave it to Carlisle.

_What is the matter with me? Just a minute ago all I wanted was to be free. Now I'm concerned about being innocent? I just want to get out of here!_

Carlisle scanned the document, quickly coming to the section regarding bail. "It looks like bail is going to be set at $3,000. As soon as Charlie comes back we'll see if we can get the charges dropped or pay the bail amount." We all looked up, hearing Charlie's footsteps as he drew closer to the interrogation room.

**Cameraman's POV**

What is going on? Why is the volume fading in and out? I checked the video recording equipment. Everything looks to be in order but the microphones aren't catching all the dialogue. Could be a glitch. I'll have to mention that to the chief when we've finished filming.

**Charlie's POV**

It was time to wrap this up and let Emmett Cullen off the hook. I walked down the hallway to the interrogation room.

"I'm sorry, but that's all the time I can allow. I haven't decided whether or not to formally charge your son, but I can allow him to be released on bail if you are willing to put up the bail amount."

Carlisle spoke up right away, "Yes Charlie, we are willing to do that. May we take this to your desk, the four of us?"

_Gotta keep it looking real, Charlie, _I said to myself.I pretended to consider his request and after only a few seconds I said, "Yes, that's acceptable. Please follow me."

I kept Emmett in front of me and directed everyone towards my desk. Just as we were sitting down and I was pulling out the forms that would need to be completed to "release" Emmett, my "deputy" came rushing over.

"Chief Swan, I just received a phone call from the Port Angeles Police Dept. It seems they've located the Jeep reported stolen by Mr. U. Binhad. The vehicle was found abandoned behind a deserted warehouse in Port Angeles, with its license plates and registration intact. The vehicle Mr. Cullen was trying to enter was not the vehicle stolen from Mr. Binhad."

"Anything else, deputy?" I asked.

The deputy nodded. "Yes, Chief Swan. Before we left Newton's Olympic Outfitters, Officers Crockett and Tubbs arrived to impound the vehicle. While Crockett was doing a search of the area he found a license plate and registration near a bush about 15 feet from the Jeep. He confirmed that the name on the registration was Emmett Cullen."

Emmett yelled out, "YES!!!" which earned disapproving looks from Carlisle, Esme and I.

I turned back to the deputy. "Are you absolutely certain that the Jeep belongs to Emmett Cullen?"

"Yes, sir," replied the deputy. "We checked the VIN number on the registration against the VIN number inside the vehicle and it is a 100% match. It belongs to Mr. Cullen."

I turned towards Emmett. "Well, Mr. Cullen, I guess this is your lucky day after all. It appears that you were telling the truth. No charges will be filed. You are free to go."

**Emmett's POV**

FREEDOM!!! Charlie couldn't see this but I was doing a happy dance inside my head. _Go Emmett, go Emmett, it's your birthday, it's your birthday!_

We stood up at the same time, me probably faster than the others. "Thank you, Chief Swan. I can't tell you how thankful I am that you now believe me."

"Well, I'm sorry if it appeared I was harsh but I have a responsibility to this community to investigate all matters that pertain to public safety." Charlie paused, looking as if he wanted to say more. "Mr. Cullen, it seems that you've had a hard time staying out of trouble. Might I suggest that you refrain from doing anything further that could be construed as harmful to the safety of any citizen of this community? I think you know who and what I am referring to."

I got the message loud and clear. "Yes, sir. I will be on my best behavior from this point on. If I could go back and do this all over again, I would have made different choices."

"Yes, and I'm sure you'll be making the right choices in the future." He gave a little shake of his head and then held his hand out to me. "I guess you can call me Charlie again. I hope there are no hard feelings. My daughter is going to be a part of your family shortly and I know she wouldn't like to see tension between any of her family members, old and new."

I took his hand and shook it. "Thank you, Charlie. I agree. No hard feelings. I'm anxious for Bella to become part of the family as well. I already love her like a sister and would do anything to protect her from harm. I won't be the one who causes any more harm to her, in any way, shape or form."

Carlisle stepped forward as well, with a smile on his face. "Charlie. We, all of us, are excited to have Bella officially join our family and that includes you as her father. If you're not doing anything tonight, why don't you stop by for dinner? Alice said that you agreed to let Bella spend the night. The boys tell me there's a ballgame on tonight. We can watch it together."

Esme added, "Yes, please do Charlie."

Charlie smiled. "That sounds great. I'll just finish up here and stop by in an hour?"

Carlisle shook Charlie's hand again. "That would be great, Charlie. We'll see you in an hour."

I followed Carlisle and Esme outside, happy to be a free man again.

**Charlie's POV**

Like I said earlier, revenge is such a sweet thing. Now it was time to make nice with Emmett Cullen, which I would do for Bella's sake. But it had been a lot of fun watching him squirm.

I walked over to the little office around the corner from my desk. The cameraman was removing the tapes from the recorders.

"So, did you get everything?" I asked

The cameraman nodded. "I got almost everything, sir. I did have some trouble picking up the conversation in the interrogation room between that Cullen guy and his parents. They were speaking pretty low to begin with, and then their voices would fade before going back to normal. I think there was a glitch in the recording system. The microphones couldn't pick up most of the dialogue, but there is some there."

"That's alright. As long as we got my interrogation in there, it will be fine." I held my hand out for the tapes. "I believe Jasper Cullen said to give the tapes to me? And that he'd taken care of your fee?"

"Yes, sir. Here are the tapes. Mr. Cullen has already taken care of my fee," replied the cameraman.

"Well, thank you for assistance. I'll escort you out of the building." I said, gesturing with my arm for the cameraman to proceed towards the entrance.

Yes, revenge is sweet.

**Carlisle's POV**

Esme got into her car and drove back home, with Emmett and I right behind her. He'd decided to ride back with me, probably thinking I would serve as a buffer from the teasing he was sure to receive from his siblings.

The whole jailhouse scene had gone very well. I think Emmett was sufficiently chastised and it would be an experience he would never forget. It almost made me sorry that we still had the final prank to play on him. Almost.

* * *

A/N: Okay, I took a few liberties with the Charlie interrogating Emmett part. Technically you would plead the Fifth when in a court of law. When being interrogated in jail, if you tell the police you do not want to answer questions and you want an attorney, they have to stop questioning you right away. But, because this is a "fake" interrogation and for the purpose of making the story flow I went ahead and let Emmett plead the Fifth every time Charlie asked a question, so that Charlie could pretend to get angry when Emmett would do this. I'm terrible, I know. Don't be sad for Emmett, he will recover.

For those readers who are not from the U.S., the Fifth Amendment in our Constitution protects witnesses from self-incrimination, or the right to remain silent. It's very similar to the right to silence laws in Britain, Australia and New Zealand. So, in the U.S. if you do not want to answer a question you can "plead the fifth", claiming your right not to say anything that might incriminate you.


	18. Emmett CullenYou've Been Punked!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

A/N: Hi, everyone. Thank you so much for your patience! Here it is - the final prank chapter. It's super long, sometimes dramatic, always funny and hopefully completely satisfying. I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen: Emmett Cullen…You've Been Punk'd!**

**Emmett's POV**

As Carlisle pulled into the driveway, my overwhelming feeling was one of relief. Today had felt like one of the longest of my vampire life and to say that I was happy to finally be home after my "ordeal" was putting it lightly. All I cared about was getting inside undetected, before I had to face the music with Edward and Alice.

As I stepped out of the car I listened carefully, checking to see who was home. I could hear Bella's heartbeat coming from Edward's room. _Sounds like she's taking a nap_. I couldn't hear any other sounds but that didn't mean the others weren't there or that they wouldn't be back shortly. _I don't want to face anyone yet. I'd better hide out in the garage for a while. Besides, I need to check on Rosalie's car. I'm going to find that dent if it's the last thing I do!_

Carlisle was already moving towards the house so I quickly called out, "I'll catch you later, Carlisle. I think I'll run out to the garage, check on Rosalie's car." He waved in response as he went inside.

I quickly ran out to the garage to check on Rosie's M3. When I got to the garage my Jeep was back in its spot with the M3 next to it. _Good! Edward drove it back. I was hoping it wouldn't get towed before I had a chance to retrieve it. _If I'd had to go back to Newton's Olympic Outfitters, I would have made sure to have my keys this time! But Edward had saved me the trouble so all I had to do was make sure everything was okay.

Next up, Rosalie's car. _Where is that damn dent? _I still couldn't spot it! Since there were no prying eyes watching, I started running my hands over the surface of the car, trying to feel for the dent, any dent, in the body of the car. Nothing, absolutely nothing.

I was so involved in checking over the car that I hadn't noticed Rosalie walk into the garage. I looked up and there she was, standing there watching me with a puzzled expression on her face. _CRAP! I'm not finished yet! She's gonna know what happened! _I realized that I needed to say something before she got suspicious. _Just play it cool, Emmett! Lean against the car and act like there's nothing wrong! _I quickly spun around and leaned against the car, trying not to look like I was hiding anything, which of course I was! _Damn! My knees are shaking! Cut it out! _

"Hey, babe. What are you doing?" she asked. "I thought we were going to go for a drive this afternoon. I've been waiting for hours. Where have you been?"

_Oh no! I forgot about that! What do I say? I'm not ready to confess anything yet! Calm down Emmett, you're starting to panic again!_

"We-ll…" _Did my voice just crack?! _"Sorry, Rosie. I had to run a quick errand and it took a little longer than I thought," I squeaked. _Real cool, Emmett, _I said to myself. _Why not just drop down on your knees and give her a full confession! _

"So, you couldn't call and let me know?" she asked, hands on her waist. "And now I find you in the garage running your hands all over my baby. Should I be jealous or should I be suspicious you're checking her over for damage?" She started laughing at her joke, except it wasn't a joke to me. I stood there staring at her like a deer caught in the headlights. _Don't say a word… _So what did I do instead? I giggled like a girl! _What the hell is wrong with me? _

Rosalie stopped laughing and stared at me. "What's going on, Emmett? You're acting really strange today. Or should I say stranger than you were acting this morning?"

"Nothing!" _Damn! My voice cracked again! _"Uh, nothing's wrong. What gave you that idea? Everything's fine, no problem." _Right…no problem. The only problem is the sign on my forehead that says "Yes, Rosie, I'm guilty!"_

"Okay…if you say so." Rosalie was eyeing me a little suspiciously, before shaking her head and rolling her eyes at me. "Listen, can we take that drive another time? Bella is napping but when she wakes Alice wants to go over the wedding plans with her, and she wants input from Esme and I."

_YES! _

"Uh, yeah. No problem, Rosie, we'll do it another time." I said, trying not to let her see the relief on my face.

"Okay. I'll see you later," she said as she gave me a peck on the check and a swat on my backside. As she walked out of the garage she looked back over her shoulder and with a wink said, "Oh, and stop feeling up my car…save it for me!"

_Oh man, what am I going to do?_

**Rosalie's POV**

I left Emmett in the garage and went straight to Alice's room. Emmett had managed to play it cool…barely. "They're back and Emmett's hanging out in the garage, trying to avoid us," I said, pausing and then continuing in a dead-pan voice. "I caught him feeling up my car."

They all knew what I was referring to. The non-existent dent referred to in Mr. U. Binhad's note. We all started laughing before turning serious. It was time for the final prank.

**Alice's POV**

"Okay, let's roll!" I said as softly as I could. "Emmett's going to be back inside the house in approximately 3 minutes and 34 seconds." I handed an electric blanket to Edward and a heating pad to Bella. "Edward, we need to elevate Bella's temperature so she appears feverish. Wrap her up in the blanket and put it at the highest setting she can take. Bella, use the heating pad on your face!"

Edward sat Bella on the bed and started wrapping her in the blanket while Bella held the heating pad to her face. "Like this?" Bella whispered.

"Perfect!" I grabbed the control from Edward and started turning the heat setting higher, all the way up to maximum.

"Alice, not too high!" Edward said when he noticed the heat setting I had chosen. "What are you trying to do, give her heatstroke?"

"Oh, chill out, Edward! We just need to keep the blanket on long enough to make her nice and toasty." I rolled my eyes at him. "Geez, give me some credit here!"

Edward wasn't convinced, but Bella gave me a little wink and cupped his face with her free hand. "Don't worry, Edward. It's still heating up. I won't keep in on any longer than necessary, alright?"

Edward sighed and nodded his head in agreement. _I love my little sister! She has him wrapped around her little finger, and he knows it! _

It was time for make-up. "Rosalie, get over here! Use my purple eye shadow and start shading under her eyes!"

Rosalie went over to Bella and started smudging the eye shadow under Bella's eyes, giving her that "I haven't had a peaceful sleep in a long time" look.

Next, I turned to Jasper. "Jasper, it's time!" Jasper quickly left the room to get into position with the hidden camera.

By this time Bella was starting to sweat from the high heat setting. Her cheeks were a lovely red color. Perfect!

"Edward, take the blanket off now!" I said as I gave her one last look-over and quietly opened my door, peeking out. There was Emmett, right on time, sitting in the living room. "Okay, he's sitting in his chair with the TV on. Bella, get out there and make us proud!" I said, lightly shoving her out the door.

"Edward, as soon as Bella makes her way back from the kitchen, you need to get yourself outside and to the front door." Edward nodded as he glanced over at the monitor, watching as Bella went down the stairs.

The rest of us turned our attention to the monitor as well, ready for the show to begin.

**Jasper's POV**

I'd settled myself back in my hiding spot with the hidden camera, ready to start recording again. Watching Bella make her way downstairs, I checked to see if she was feeling nervous or if she needed my help calming down. All I could feel was determination. _Good girl! You can do this, Bella!_

I started recording, ready for the final prank to begin.

**Bella's POV**

I had to hand it to Alice, this was a great idea. I was getting warmer by the minute under the electric blanket and as soon as I was "cooked" it would be time to give Emmett another scare.

"Edward, take the blanket off now!" Alice said, giving me one last look-over before lightly shoving me out the door. "Bella, get out there and make us proud!"

_Geez, Alice, no need to get pushy!_ I started down the stairs, feeling very confident about what was to come. _I can do this! _

**Emmett's POV**

I snuck back into the house, praying that everyone would stay in whatever part of the house they were in. What dignity I had left I wanted to keep intact and having to endure the teasing of my brothers and sisters was not going to help.

I was feeling frustrated because I _still_ could not find the dent in Rosalie's car. I don't know what I'm going to do. All I know is I need a time-out. Maybe a little TV will help.

Remembering this morning and my troubles with the TV and the remote control, I walked up to the TV and manually turned it on. Good! TV is working and there's even a game on this channel. I quickly sat down in the armchair, praying I wouldn't hear the sound of fabric ripping like this morning. No ripping sounds. I was safe in the chair, a game was on and I wasn't going to move from this chair for anything!

Before I could get into the game I noticed Bella coming down the stairs. _Wow, she looks tired. Her cheeks are kind of flushed too. I hope everything is alright with her, _I thought to myself as she made her way to where I was sitting.

"Hey Emmett. Everything okay there?" Bella asked, stopping at my chair.

"I've had better days, Bella." _Hey, I wasn't lying, was I? _"And you? Are you feeling okay? You look kinda tired, and your color is high. Not your usual shade of pale…" I said, trying to get back some sense of normality, teasing her the way I normally would.

"Ha-ha, Emmett. Actually, I still feel a little lightheaded." She wiped her brow. "Is it me or is it warm in the house?" Bella started shivering when she said this. _Wait a minute! Don't humans do this when they have fever? _

Bella started rubbing her arms as if she were trying to warm herself. "Weird. I was feeling fine this morning and then you saw what happened. Edward's had me resting most of the day, and Alice asked my Dad if I could stay over tonight so I can continue resting. Hopefully I'll feel better by tomorrow morning," she said.

_She doesn't look good, _I thought to myself. The skin under her eyes was darker, almost like ours when we're thirsty. And her flushed skin was not normal…well at least not normal unless Edward was nearby!

"Bella, you should be lying down. You look really out of it. Edward is going to have a fit if he finds you missing from his room." I was concerned because I'd never seen her like this.

She rubbed her face with both hands, this time stopping to rub her temples. "I know, but I really need to stretch my legs. I decided to come downstairs for juice or water." She started walking towards the kitchen, but paused, turning back around to face me.

"Emmett, have you seen Edward or Alice? When I woke from my nap Edward was gone. He left a note saying he had to run a quick errand but he hasn't returned and when I checked Alice's room she wasn't there."

I started squirming in my chair. I wasn't ready to share my humiliation yet, especially with Bella.

"Uh, no…I haven't seen them in a while." _Damn! What is it with my voice cracking! It's like I'm a teenage human male again! _

"Well, if you see Edward before I, would you let him know I was looking for him?" she asked, continuing on to the kitchen.

"Sure thing Bella, I'll let him know." I didn't know how I was going to keep that promise. I didn't want to see him for a very long time!

**Bella's POV**

_He bought it! I'm better at this acting stuff than I thought! Don't mess it up now! _

I slowly walked to the kitchen and grabbed a plastic cup from the cupboard. Yes, plastic, not glass. With my luck I would drop the glass, cut myself and in a house full of vampires that would not go over well!

It was time for the next act. I started going over strategy in my head again. _Act weak and woozy. Remember Edward's dazzling technique. Edward staring deeply into my eyes, breathing softly on my face, me going weak in the knees. Now, drop the cup!_

I dropped the cup in the sink and heard Emmett calling to me from the living room. "Bella, you okay in there?"

"Uh, yeah, I think so. I just dropped a cup." I replied in a small voice. _Keep it going, don't stop._

I slowly walked out of the kitchen and past Emmett. "I think I'm going to go back upstairs and lay down." I could see Emmett watching me closely. _It's working!_

I made my way to the stairs, climbing each step slowly, one step at a time while pretending to take a deep breath each step I took. It was time to take it to the next level. _Okay, here we go. Start swaying! Think of Edward again, dazzling me, weak knees. Got it!_

I grabbed hold of the banister and started to let my knees buckle from under me. "Emmett…help me…" I whispered as I let go of the banister. _Please catch me, Emmett. Please don't let me fall! _I said to myself.

"BELLA!" Emmett cried out, running to the stairs and catching me before I fell. He carried me to the bottom of the stairs and winced as he put his hand on my forehead. "Jesus, Bella! You're burning up!"

I started to gasp as if I couldn't get enough air. "Get Carlisle! I…can't…breathe…"

**Edward's POV**

We were watching Bella's performance on the monitor, and I was so proud of her. She was magnificent. She was breathtaking. She was acting like a true Cullen! Alice was softly clapping her hands, jumping up and down as she watched Bella. Esme was smiling beautifully, proud of her newest daughter. Even Rosalie was impressed, giving me the thumbs-up signal.

Before I had a chance to respond, Alice started pushing me towards the window. "Okay, Edward, it's time. Outside. NOW!" _Pushy little pixie._

I jumped out the window and made my way towards the front of the house, waiting for Bella's cue. _Sweetheart, you're doing great!_

I didn't have to wait long. I listened as Bella started gasping for air, followed by, "Get Carlisle! I…can't…breathe…"

_That's my cue. _I came through the front door as Emmett started yelling, "CARLISLE! Come quick!"

I came in through the front door, pausing for a split second as my eyes zoomed in on Emmett with Bella in his arms at the bottom of the stairs. I rushed over and took her from Emmett. "Bella, sweetheart, what's wrong?" I started touching her face, her arms. "Emmett, what the hell is going on? What did you do to her this time?" I yelled.

Emmett stood up quickly, pulling his hair by the roots. "I didn't do anything! I was watching TV and Bella was walking up the stairs when she started swaying. She grabbed the banister and called my name, asking for help. I caught her before she fell and when I brought her back to the bottom of the stairs I put my hand on her forehead. Edward, her skin is burning up! Right before you came through she started gasping for air and I called for Carlisle!"

Carlisle came running into the room as Emmett was giving me his explanation. My little actress was really into her role, pretending to gasp for air and rolling her head back and forth. "Carlisle! I…can't…breathe…"

I looked up at Carlisle and said in a desperate voice, "Help her, Carlisle! Do something!"

Carlisle took charge of the situation immediately. "Edward, she needs oxygen! Bring her to the med room; all my supplies and equipment are in there." I stood up and ran with Carlisle to the med room, kicking the door shut with my foot.

**Alice's POV**

Carlisle and Edward had just run into the med room with Bella and the door was kicked shut. That was our cue.

"Okay, girls. Let's get downstairs." I said as I threw open the door and started running down the stairs, closely followed by Esme and Rosalie.

"Emmett, what happened?" I cried, looking to Emmett for an answer, with Esme and Rosalie standing next to me.

"I don't know, Alice! One minute she's in the kitchen getting something to drink and the next she's gasping for air. She says she can't breathe! Carlisle and Edward took her to the med room. They closed the door. I can't see what's happening in there!" Emmett was pulling at his hair, pacing the floor, unable to keep still.

Esme quickly brought her hand up to her mouth. "Bella! Please don't let anything happen to her!"

Rosalie put her arm around Esme, pretending to comfort her. "Don't worry, Esme. Carlisle won't let anything happen to her. He's got all the necessary equipment in the room. It's better equipped than a hospital emergency room, you know that."

Esme looked at Rosalie and gave her a quick hug. "Thank you, Rosalie. You're right. It's just…Bella is so fragile." She looked down and then back up with a fierce expression on her face. "This is why she needs to be changed! She's too vulnerable! I can't stand to see her in danger like this! It makes me think we could lose her, and if we lose her we could lose Edward too!"

I went over to Esme and pulled her into a hug. "Esme, please don't say that. That can't happen!"

We listened to the sounds coming from the med room. We could hear Bella gasping for air and Carlisle telling her he was going to put an oxygen mask over her face. Finally, we heard the sound of air flowing into the mask.

Emmett continued to pace, his head jerking up with each new sound coming from the room. He finally sat down on the sofa, Rosalie sitting beside him. I could hear her trying to comfort him.

It was time for me to pretend to have a vision. I went completely still, as if in a trance-like state. I heard Rosalie and Emmett both say my name at the same time, and then the doorbell rang.

Charlie had arrived. Ooh, things were starting to get exciting around here!

**Emmett's POV**

_Oh, god, Bella! What's the matter with her? I've never seen her like this! What else is going to go wrong today?_

Carlisle and Edward ran Bella to the special room that Carlisle had created for Bella when we returned to Forks seven months after her disastrous birthday party. Since she's so prone to accidents, Carlisle felt it was important to have a room set up to handle any emergency imaginable. This room had more advanced equipment and supplies than the local hospital emergency room! Carlisle would be able to handle any medical emergency and Bella would be a whole lot more comfortable being treated here than at the hospital.

Edward kicked the door shut and a split second later I heard the sound of Alice's door being thrown open and Alice running down the stairs. Esme and Rosalie must have heard as well because they were on her heels.

And what was I doing? I was running circles around myself, trying not to wear a hole through Esme's floor. Something was seriously wrong with Bella! God, I hope it doesn't have anything to do with this weekend!

"Emmett, what happened?" Alice cried, looking at me for an answer as were Esme and Rosalie.

"I don't know, Alice! One minute she's downstairs getting something to drink and the next she's gasping for air. She says she can't breathe! Carlisle and Edward took her to the med room. They closed the door. I can't see what's happening in there!" I was pulling at my hair, pacing back and forth, unable to keep still.

Esme was worried about Bella and Rosalie was trying to comfort her. But what Esme said next would have made my blood run cold, if I'd had any left in my body.

"…It's just…Bella is so fragile." She looked down and then back up with a fierce expression on her face. "This is why she needs to be changed! She's too vulnerable! I can't stand to see her in danger like this! It makes me think we could lose her, and if we lose her we could lose Edward too!"

All I heard was "_if we lose her, we could lose Edward too." _Once before Edward thought he'd lost Bella and had gone to the Volturi to ask them to destroy him. Fortunately Bella and Alice had arrived in time to prevent this. When they'd returned Edward promised Bella and the rest of the family he would never do that again. But would he be able to keep that promise if Bella no longer existed?

I tuned everyone out at this point and sat down, putting my head in my hands, mumbling to myself, _please be okay, Bella. I don't know what we would do without you. Edward needs you! WE need you, little sis!_

Rosalie sat next to me on the sofa, putting her arms around me and whispering words of comfort to me. All we could do was listen to the sounds coming from the med room. Bella's gasping for air, an oxygen mask being put over her face to help her breath, followed by the sound of sound of air flowing through the mask. Bella stopped gasping as the oxygen was forced into her lungs.

I looked at Rosalie. "Rosie, what if she's not okay? What are we going to do?"

Rosalie hugged me tightly and said, "Emmett, you can't think like that. We have to believe she will be alright. Alice would have seen if this were going to end badly, right Alice?"

We both looked over at Alice, who was standing completely still. She was having a vision! I looked at Rosalie and at the same time we called her name. "Alice?"

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. We'd been so distracted by the drama taking placing in the med room that we'd forgotten Charlie was going to drop by. OH NO!

**Jasper's POV**

Wow! Once again, Bella was nailing her performance. Emmett was frantic, pacing back and forth in the living room. He was going to wear a hole in Esme's floor if he didn't stop. Of course, I was doing all I could to exaggerate what he was feeling. But I had to hold back a little. _It's too soon, gotta hold back, _I said to myself. There was still more drama to come and I didn't want Emmett to become the first vampire in history to have a heart attack! HA! I couldn't wait to finally put the tape together when this was over.

The doorbell rang. _Charlie, _I said to myself. I pointed the camera at the front door and got ready for the action to begin again.

**Rosalie's POV**

Edward and Carlisle had just taken Bella into the med room and Emmett was practically running circles around himself, pacing back and forth in the living room and mumbling to himself. _Aw, baby, it's almost over. We're going to let you off the hook soon. _He quickly explained what had happened and after soon after sat on the sofa. As soon as he sat down I went to sit beside him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and whispering words of comfort.

Emmett looked up. "Rosie, what if she's not okay? What are we going to do?"

I hugged him tightly. He looked like he needed it! "Emmett, you can't think like that. We have to believe she will be alright. Alice would have seen if this were going to end badly, right Alice?"

We both looked over at Alice, who was standing completely still, as if in the middle of a vision. _Very good, Alice. _Emmett and I looked at each other and at the same time called her name. "Alice?"

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Charlie was here! This was getting exciting and there was more to come!

**Bella's POV**

Wow, this room was incredible! It had everything you would find in a hospital: heart monitors, defibrillators, x-ray machines, oxygen, IV's, all sorts of tubes and bandages, surgical supplies, medicines, and even a hospital bed! I didn't know if I should feel flattered or insulted that Carlisle had stocked it so well for me. Did they really think I was an emergency crisis waiting to happen? Knowing me and my luck the answer was a resounding "yes."

_I wish Jasper's monitors were in this room!_ I thought to myself. When Edward and Carlisle rushed me to the med room, Edward kicked the door shut so that Emmett wouldn't be able to see what was happening behind the closed door, but this also meant we wouldn't be able to see what was going on in the other room. Edward would be able to hear the thoughts of everyone on the other side of the door, and both he and Carlisle could hear anything spoken, but I wouldn't be able to do either!

Of course, even behind closed doors we still had to maintain the act so here I was, lying on the hospital bed and pretending to gasp for air as Carlisle explained he was going to put an oxygen mask on me, and then the sound of air flowing into the mask. Fortunately Carlisle had thought ahead and had made tiny little holes in the mask to allow the extra air to escape. It wouldn't do for me to start hyperventilating…I mean, I already do that when Edward kisses me!

Carlisle and Edward were having a silent conversation and I wanted to know what was going on. _Come on guys, let me in on the plan. You know I hate surprises!_

**Carlisle's POV**

I ran into the room as soon as I heard Emmett trying to explain to Edward what had happened on the stairs. Bella was lying in Edward's arms, gasping for air. "Carlisle! I…can't…breathe…"

I was proud of Bella. She was pulling off the performance of a lifetime. Emmett had completely bought into her act. Watching as she performed like a true Cullen only reinforced my belief in her place among the family.

Edward, still playing the part, was pleading in a desperate voice, "Help her, Carlisle! Do something!"

I took charge of the situation immediately. "Edward, she needs oxygen! Bring her to the med room; all my supplies and equipment are in there." I stood up and ran to med room, followed by Edward who, in a stroke of genius, kicked the door shut so Emmett couldn't see what was going on in the room. He would only be able to hear what we wanted him to hear. Perfect.

**Edward's POV**

We ran into the room and at the last minute I kicked the door shut; I wanted Emmett to _hear_ what was happening in the room, but not _see _anything we didn't want him to see.

I lay Bella on the hospital bed and indicated she should continue gasping for breath. Carlisle came over and explained out loud (for Emmett's benefit) that he was going to put an oxygen mask over her face to help her breathe. The sound of air flowing into the mask was the only sound in the room at this moment. We didn't want Bella to hyperventilate from too much air, so there were tiny little holes in the mask that allowed the excess air to escape.

I heard Carlisle calling for me through his thoughts.

_Edward, I want you to follow my lead. Charlie will be arriving shortly. I want him in here while we're dealing with Bella's "medical crisis" and with Emmett and the others able to hear what's going on in this room we need to be able to communicate the plan to him without Emmett overhearing. Take this notepad and write down everything I tell you, except for any references to Jasper's special ability._

I grabbed the notebook from his hand and quickly began writing down everything he had said up to this point and then turned the notepad towards Bella so she could read what I had written down.

Bella quickly read it and then gestured to me to give her the notepad and pen so that she could write her own note. _Ok. We wait for my dad. What's the plan after he arrives?_

Ah, my Bella. She hates surprises. Carlisle had come to stand on the other side of the bed and he read what Bella had written on the notepad.

_Edward, tell her we're going to hook her up to the heart monitor and an IV. She won't actually have the IV needle in her arm; I'll just make it appear that way. As soon as Charlie arrives I'll step outside the room and will let him know Bella's "condition." My cue for you to call me back into the room will be, "Carlisle, get in here! She's going into cardiac arrest!" and then Charlie and I will run back into the room and we'll go from there._

I wrote down what Carlisle said and let Bella read what I had written, handing her the pen in case she had any other questions. She wrote the following: _If I'm going into cardiac arrest, won't Emmett be able to tell that my heart is still beating normally?_ _The heart monitor will be beeping at a normal rate and he'll know I'm not in distress._

Carlisle read Bella's message and nodded. _Let Bella know I've modified the heart monitor so that we can make her heart rate appear to go up or down. Emmett will be concentrating on the beeps the monitor is making, not her heartbeat. Jasper is also going to use his influence to slow down or raise Bella's heartbeat as needed…and before you ask, he said to tell you he will be very careful! Remember, Jasper will be manipulating Emmett's emotions. Emmett won't realize what's really happening with your heart. He'll be too confused and upset and whatever other emotion Jasper decides to throw at him._

I wrote it down as Carlisle said, except for the reference to Jasper. That part I wrote on a separate piece of paper and held both out for Bella to read.

She looked at the both of us with a big smile on her face and gave us the thumbs-up signal before laying back down. Carlisle and I grinned in return and got to work. While Carlisle "started" the IV, I gestured to Bella to unbutton the top buttons of her shirt so I could tape two electrodes to her chest above her heart. I turned her around so her back was facing me and quickly reached up under her shirt to tape one last electrode to her back, before having her lay back down.

We heard the doorbell ring. Charlie had arrived. I leaned down and gave Bella a quick kiss for luck and we got ready for the next act. The big finale was almost at hand.

**Charlie's POV**

I arrived at the Cullen's house and rang the doorbell. Esme answered the door and led me into the living room, the mood somber. Alice was standing still, as if she were in a daze. Emmett looked upset and Rosalie was sitting next to him, her arms around his shoulders. It was a good thing I knew what was going to happen next, even if I didn't know the specifics. The tension in the room was high. Everyone was playing their parts perfectly, and Emmett was of course clueless. Good. All I had to do was wait for Carlisle to appear and follow his lead.

"So, how is everyone?" I said, as an icebreaker.

Esme was the first to reply. "Charlie…I don't know how to say this but…"

"What's going on, Esme? Is something wrong with Bella? Where is she?" I pretended to be looking around the room for my daughter, acting as if I were starting to worry.

Right on cue, Carlisle came rushing into the room. Everyone, including myself, gathered around him. "Charlie, I need you to come with me. Bella's ill…"

_Here we go._

"What do you mean Bella's ill? She was fine when I left for work this morning!" I said, letting a little panic seep into my voice.

"Alice says when she arrived at the house Bella was feeling a little lightheaded, so she and Edward had Bella lying down most of the day, resting. Just before you arrived Bella had walked down to the kitchen for something to drink and when she was going back upstairs she started to faint. Emmett caught her just in time and called for me. When I came into the room, Edward was holding her and she was gasping for air so Edward and I ran her into the med room so that I could treat her." Carlisle turned slightly towards me and gave a small wink which was not seen by Emmett. I continued to follow his lead.

"How bad is she, Carlisle? And why the hell didn't someone take her to the hospital emergency room?" I ran my hand through my hair for effect, taking a deep breath and blowing it out before continuing, "Carlisle, you know I have the utmost faith in your ability as a doctor, but you don't have the equipment in your home to deal with medical emergencies. I'm not going to have my daughter put at risk!"

Carlisle replied, "There wasn't time, Charlie. She was in distress and I needed to start treating her immediately." Carlisle placed his his hand on my shoulder. "When we returned to Forks I added a med room which is fully equipped with all the latest machines and technology in medicine. I'm actually better equipped to handle emergencies right here than I am at the hospital. Believe me, Charlie; I can deal with any situation here and Bella will be much more comfortable than if she were at the hospital."

I've got to hand it to the Cullens, when they go all out, they go all the way!

Before I had a chance to ask any more questions, we heard Edward yelling, "Carlisle, get in here! She's going into cardiac arrest!"

I started running towards the room where Edward's voice was coming from, with Carlisle on my heels. Once we reached the room, Carlisle slammed the door shut.

The first thing I saw as I entered the room was Bella lying on the bed, eyes closed, with an oxygen mask on her face, hooked up to an IV and heart monitor machine. Edward was sitting in a chair next to the bed, holding her hand. For a second my heart stopped. It looked so real, until she raised her head, opened her eyes and winked at me, eyes twinkling. I could tell she was smiling underneath the mask, and if that wasn't enough to reassure me, Edward had a huge grin on his face as well.

Edward quickly got up from the chair and gestured for me to keep quiet while handing me a notepad which I read quickly.

I handed the notepad back to Edward, giving him a thumbs-up sign so they would know I understood and agreed.

Edward wrote something more on the notepad. _Charlie, even though Emmett and the others can't see what's happening in the room, we want Emmett to "hear" what's going on. We're pretending she's going into "cardiac arrest" and that we're trying to revive her. Bella's going to start gasping for air and Carlisle will start shouting out instructions. Are you ready? _

I nodded, and then Edward turned to show the notepad to Bella. She nodded her understanding. Here we go.

**Emmett's POV**

_What is going on in there? Why hasn't someone come out to tell us how Bella's doing?_

This wait was making me crazy. Would this day never end! Just when I think things are starting to settle down, something more happens! It's my worst day ever!

The hits just keep on coming, one after another. Alice had had a vision and from the look on her face I could tell it wasn't good. And now Charlie was here and he knew something was very wrong. He was trying to get information out of Esme but before she could respond Carlisle came rushing into the room, having heard Charlie's voice. We gathered around, waiting for Carlisle to let us know the situation.

Carlisle spoke to Charlie first. "Charlie, I need you to come with me. Bella's ill…"

I could hear the panic in Charlie's voice as he interrupted Carlisle. "What do you mean Bella's ill? She was fine before I left for work this morning!"

Carlisle explained the events of the morning up until the moment she was gasping for air and they had rushed her into the med room. He paused, letting Charlie take in this information, but before he could continue we heard Edward yell, "Carlisle, get in here! She's going into cardiac arrest!"

I stopped dead in my tracks. **NO!!!**

Charlie started running to the med room, followed closely by Carlisle who slammed the door shut. _Damn! Why did he have to close the door again? We can't see anything! _

I could hear Bella gasping for air and then suddenly there was silence! That's when the yelling started. I heard Charlie shout, "She's stopped breathing, Carlisle!"

The heart monitor which had been beeping steadily had suddenly flat-lined. Edward and Charlie both yelled, "NO!" I heard Carlisle telling Edward to start CPR while he charged up the defibrillator.

_**Oh, god. I killed her. This is my fault!**_

**Jasper's POV**

Everyone was playing their parts perfectly, and Emmett didn't have a clue. His emotions were all over the place, with a little help from me, of course.

Charlie had arrived and Carlisle had come out of the med room to speak with Charlie. Suddenly we heard Edward yell, "Carlisle, get back in here! She's going into cardiac arrest!"

Emmett was so predictable. Once again there was guilt, but now added to the mix was fear and more panic. Concentrating on Emmett once again, I helped amplify those feelings. _Hope there isn't any permanent damage from all this emotional manipulation, Emmett! Wouldn't want you to be the first vampire in history to lose his mind! _

It was time for me to go downstairs for a while, to be with the family. Emmett was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he hadn't noticed my absence from the room. Alice was going to share her "vision" with Emmett and I needed to be in the room so he wouldn't become suspicious. I trained the video camera on the area surrounding the sofa and fireplace and allowed, hit record and went downstairs to join the others.

There was a camcorder hiding next to the sofa. When the time came Alice would hand it to me and I would continue to film Emmett, Bella and the final part of the prank.

**Carlisle's POV**

We were pretending to be moving around in the room while Bella continued to act as if she couldn't breathe.

I caught Edward's eye and silently asked him, _is Emmett buying it?_

As soon as Edward nodded, I gestured to Bella to stop what she was doing and be perfectly still and quiet. Edward reached over to the heart monitor and flipped a switch which made the heart monitor suddenly flat-line. As if it were planned, both Charlie and Edward looked at each and yelled at the same time, "NO!"

Bella was trying to stay perfectly still but it was difficult because she was also trying not to laugh. I had to smile at her enjoyment of the situation.

I pulled a mannequin from the closet and tossed it over to Edward while shouting, "Edward! You and Charlie start CPR on Bella while I charge the defibrillator! We've got to maintain the flow of oxygenated blood to her brain and heart!"

All three of them were trying not to laugh as Bella carefully moved off the bed and stood in the corner while Edward placed the mannequin on the bed. Edward was pretending to blow air into the mannequin while Charlie was counting chest compressions.

I pulled out the defibrillator and placed the pads on the mannequin's chest while shouting, "Clear!" before applying the shock.

The mannequin "jumped" and we allowed silence to fill the room for a few seconds. I yelled again, "Clear!" and applied the shock. I gave Edward the signal and he flicked another switch on the heart monitor which started beeping slowly.

Charlie grabbed the mannequin while Edward placed Bella back on the bed. Edward looked towards the door and shouted, "She's breathing again Carlisle! You did it!"

"She's still having trouble breathing on her own, Edward. I've got to put her on a ventilator until I can figure out what's wrong with her."

I moved the ventilator next to the bed and inserted a tube into Bella's nose, just high enough to keep the tube in place. The machine was already set to the lowest setting so the extra air wouldn't overwhelm Bella. I flicked the machine on and it started to "breathe" for her, its steady sound echoing through the room.

Charlie looked towards the door and started "talking" to Bella. "Bells, stay with us kid. Please stay with us! Carlisle is doing everything he can to help you."

Bella winked at her dad as we gave each other the thumbs-up signal. Operation "Revive Bella" was a success and now it was time for the final act.

**Edward's POV**

As we were acting out the crisis in the room, I was also listening to Emmett's thoughts.

I could hear in his thoughts that he was worried for Bella, and for me. Finally, he understood the danger in treating Bella's humanity so lightly! Finally, he understood why I was so protective of her. He had bought into everything completely, from the first prank of the day to now. We'd definitely got him good and he would never forget this day! We wouldn't let him!

It was still early, about 6:30 p.m. After a few more hours we were going to let him off the hook. Or rather, we were going to reveal the prank.

But first, it was time for Alice to share her "vision" with Emmett.

**Alice's POV**

_Aw, poor Emmett. _Such an emotionally charged day for him, one surprise after another, and now I had to be the bearer of bad news.

When Carlisle and Edward ran Bella to the med room, I pretended I was having a vision. Rosalie and Emmett had been nearby and noticed my sudden stillness. I made sure to keep my face perfectly still, eyes wide and unfocused, as the vision played out. When the doorbell rang signaling Charlie had arrived, I came out of my vision and made sure Emmett saw the devastated look on my face. It was time for my final performance in this prank.

Emmett was sitting on the sofa, staring into the fireplace. I walked over to the sofa and sat down beside him, and began staring at the fireplace as well.

Emmett turned to look at me. "Alice, I know you had a vision. Rosalie and I saw you, just before Charlie arrived."

We both looked up to see Jasper walking towards the sofa. I held out my hand to him and he sat next to me as I turned back to Emmett.

"It's bad, Emmett. You now my visions are subjective and depend on the decisions people make, but in this one…I can't say it!" I hid my face in my hands and turned to Jasper as he wrapped his arms around me.

"What is it, Alice?" Jasper asked, Emmett looking fearful of the answer. "What did you see?"

"Oh, Jasper! She's not going to make it! And there's nothing we can do about it! In my vision Bella's heart is weak and Edward is telling Carlisle he wants to transform her right away. Then I heard Carlisle telling Edward that her heart is too weak and she won't be able to survive the transformation!" I started dry sobbing, pretending to be unable to say anything more.

Esme and Rosalie came over, pretending to look shocked. Esme whispered one word, "No!"

Rosalie hugged Esme before turning back to me. "Alice, are you sure? Maybe this is just a vision of what _could _happen as opposed to what _will _happen!"

I shook my head, and then looked at Rosalie. "I wish it were Rosalie, but this vision is strong. I have no doubt it's going to happen. Oh, Jasper, what are we going to do? How do we break it to Edward?" I started "sobbing" again into his shoulder.

_Okay, Emmett. Let's see how you deal with this new twist!_

**Jasper's POV**

It was now around 10:00 p.m. and Emmett and Rosalie had gone over to talk with Esme. The family had been allowed in the room to see Bella. If we hadn't known it was an act, it would have been disturbing to see Bella on that hospital bed, looking so small and fragile, hooked up to all sorts of machines and monitors.

Alice and I were sitting on the sofa again. It had been a couple of hours since Alice had dropped the big bomb on Emmett and now it was my turn to act. I started concentrating on Bella, using my influence to slow her heart rate, almost as if she were in a state of hibernation. The door to the med room was open now, and I could see Edward watching me, his eyes telling me to be very careful. There was no need for the warning. I wasn't going to let anything happen to my soon-to-be sister.

Alice looked at me. She had a small piece of paper in her hand and on it she had written, "Time to make Emmett feel even worse. Put him back on the emotional rollercoaster ride, Jasper!"

I love that woman of mine!

Looking over at Emmett, I started concentrating on sending him all types of emotions.

In the words of Yoda in 'The Empire Strikes Back', it was time Emmett felt the "Force" flowing through him except my interpretation of the "Force" would be feelings of guilt, shock, regret, sorrow and fear.

_Yes, Emmett, let the "force" flow through you. Stretch out with your feelings… _

I covered my mouth to keep from laughing. Alice turned her face into my chest and started shaking, not from tears but from her own silent laughter.

**Emmett's POV**

The house was quiet. The only noise that could be heard was the ventilator helping Bella breathe and the heart monitor that was beeping in time to each breath she took. It was late, around 10:00 p.m. and Bella been in and out of consciousness for several hours now. Carlisle had run tests and had allowed the family to enter the med room to see Bella. It hadn't been a pretty sight. She lay on the bed, so small and fragile, hooked up to all sorts of machines and monitors.

I was still in shock from Alice's vision. It couldn't be true! I didn't want it to be true! But deep down inside I knew that it was going to happen. There was no way Bella could fake any of this!

Rosalie and I had gone walked across the room to talk with Esme. Alice and Jasper were quietly sitting on the sofa again. I have never seen or felt this type of grief from my family, not since the time we thought we'd lost both Bella and Edward. Carlisle had left the door open and I went to sit down on the chair next to the door, listening as Carlisle spoke with Edward and Charlie.

"I'm sorry; I don't know what else to tell you. All the tests I've run show the problem is her heart. It's too weak. The fainting episodes were a prelude to her current situation. She's not going to survive." I heard Carlisle say.

Charlie was trying to hold it together. "Carlisle, what about a heart transplant?"

Carlisle quietly replied, "Charlie, there's just no time. You have to be put on a list and unfortunately there's a shortage, not to mention a match has to be found. It could take weeks, months…Bella only has days. One by one her organs are going to shut down before a heart becomes available."

I heard Charlie say next, "Aw, Bells. Not my little girl. Is this something that was always going to happen or was there something that triggered the condition?"

"I'm not going to lie to you, Charlie. The events over the weekend most likely sped up the process. One shock after another, and then the poisoning from both the poison oak and the mushrooms. She's only alive right now because the ventilator is breathing for her. Her organs _will _start shutting down and once her brain is affected, you're going to have to decide if you are willing to let her go peacefully."

Edward grief-filled voice was next. "NO! I won't lose her, Carlisle. I can't lose her!"

Charlie put his hand on Edward's shoulder. Both men were trying to be strong but what does one do when the person they love is slipping away and there is nothing they can do to prevent it from happening?

The men stopped talking and the room was silent again, except for the sound of the ventilator and the heart monitor. I could hear Edward whisper, "I can't lose her! I can't!"

Listening to this last from Edward, I was suddenly feeling intense guilt, shock, regret, sorrow, and fear. I could feel it flowing through me!

_What have I done? I never meant for any of this to happen. What is the family going to do? What about Edward? He's never going to survive this. Our family is going to fall apart. Emmett, _I said to myself, _why couldn't you just stop, why didn't you listen? No, Bella, please, you can't die. You mean too much to this family!_

Carlisle and Edward walked past me and I saw them headed towards the kitchen. I quietly got up and followed, taking care to stay out of sight but within earshot of their conversation.

**Edward's POV**

It was around 10:00 p.m. and the mood was somber, almost funeral-like. Carlisle had allowed the family to come in and see Bella. They didn't stay long in the room, choosing to allow Charlie and I time alone with Bella.

Carlisle had left the door open so that Emmett would be able to see and hear all that happened from this point on. The big reveal was less than an hour away.

After Carlisle had "explained" Bella's diagnosis to Charlie and I, knowing Emmett was sitting in a chair next to the door and could hear the conversation, Carlisle and I walked out of the room to the kitchen to have our own "conversation." I could hear Emmett telling himself to follow but stay out of view. He wanted to hear what we were going to talk about. Good.

Carlisle and I started talking quietly in the kitchen.

"Carlisle, we need to do the transformation. We've got to get Charlie out of here so I can administer the bite. I am not going to lose her!" I put as much pain and anguish in my voice as possible.

Carlisle put his hand on my arm. "Edward, there is nothing we can do for Bella! Her heart has been weakened to the point where she would not be able to survive the transformation. She would only suffer needlessly, the venom burning through her system before her heart gives out."

"NO!" I whispered. "I can't lose her, Carlisle!"

"Edward, I wish there were something I could do, but she's beyond our help. We love you son, and we love Bella. Go to her while you still have her." Carlisle pulled me into a fatherly embrace before heading back into the med room, leaving me to "collect" myself.

I leaned against the counter, listening to Emmett's thoughts. There was sadness, and regret, and there were apologies as he realized it was his actions that had caused Bella's current state. I looked up as I saw him come into the kitchen to talk to me.

_Edward, I'm so sorry man. You have to believe that I never, not in a million years, imagined this would happen. Please tell me that you believe me!_

I looked at him, sadness and grief on my face, and nodded.

_Can I go talk to her? I need to talk to her, Edward. _I nodded my permission and slowly turned away to look outside the window.

Listening to Emmett walk towards the med room, I smiled and thought to myself, _Okay, sweetheart. It's time for your final performance. Make me proud, as always._

**Jasper's POV**

I watched Emmett come from the kitchen, followed a few seconds later by Edward. Edward gave me a quick nod and Alice quickly pulled the camcorder from its hiding spot near the sofa, giving it to me as I followed Edward to the med room. The others followed quietly, standing near the open door as I snuck into the room and placed myself in one of the darker corners of the room. Emmett was too distracted to notice everyone taking up positions in or near the room.

Ready, set, action!

**Emmett's POV**

Edward had given his permission for me to talk to Bella and I left the kitchen to make my way into the room. I could feel everyone's eyes on me, but I needed to do this.

Charlie glanced up at me as I came into the room. He had the saddest look on his face and I felt the guilt hit full-force again.

_What have I done?_

There are many things in my life that I have regretted. I regret taking innocent human lives when I wasn't able to control my bloodlust. I regret agreeing to Edward's request to leave Forks last year and leaving Bella alone. But this…this would be by far my biggest regret ever. _How would I be able to live with myself, knowing I was the cause of all of this!_

I walked over to the chair next to the bed and sat down, taking her hand in mine. The heart monitor was beeping, but slower than normal.

"Bella, can you hear me? I am so sorry for everything. I just wanted to have a little fun with you. How was I supposed to know it was going to turn out so wrong? You can't die! This family needs you! You were the missing piece and when you came into our lives our family became complete. I got the little sister I always wanted to have. Alice is fun, but you're the one that makes me laugh. And you've got guts! You're the bravest human I know, and the most unselfish. What are we going to do without you, Bella? We'll never be the same. The family will never recover from this. And Edward… I love my brother and I've always wanted him to be happy. When he met you, he completely changed. You are his world, his everything Bella."

Still holding on to her hand, I used my other to rub my jaw.

"I'm so very sorry. If I could give my life in exchange for yours, I would do it immediately. I swear Bella, I would never have done any of those pranks had I known what might happen. You can't die. You have to live! Please fight Bella, please fight. Stay with us." And, low enough that Charlie wouldn't be able to hear, I whispered, "I swear, Bella, if you can pull through this I won't prank you again while you're human..."

I jumped slightly when I saw her eyelids flutter. "Edward, Carlisle! I think she's coming around again."

Edward, Carlisle and Charlie rushed to the bed, Carlisle checking her stats while Edward grabbed her hand.

I was right! She was regaining consciousness! Her eyes slowly started to flutter open. She looked so weak.

"Bella, love, I'm here. Your father is here too, as is the family." Edward was kissing her hand gently. "Wake up sweetheart, please wake up."

Slowly her eyes opened. "Edward…I feel so weak. What's happening to me? It's so hard to breathe; everything hurts."

I hung my head, feeling lower than I had ever felt in my entire existence.

**Bella's POV**

Finally, the moment was here. Revenge. Such a sweet word! I could say with absolute certainty that Emmett deserved it. As much as I love my soon-to-be brother, he was finally going to understand why he should not mess with the youngest, and newest, member of the Cullen family!

I went over the list of things he had done to me over those two days at the Cullens: nearly scaring me to death, the whipped cream and water balloon episode, the nightmarish run through the forest, poison oak rash, skunk, leeches, mushroom poisoning. Oh yes, I deserved my moment.

And they said I couldn't act! I think my performance has been Oscar worthy.

I could hear everyone in the room. It was so quiet, like a museum, everyone speaking in the soft tones you hear when someone is sick, or dying. That's right Emmett; see what you've done to the family.

Finally, I heard Emmett making his way to the bed. I felt his hand lift mine as he gently held it. He started talking quietly, telling me how sorry he was (_**again**_) and telling me to fight. _Oh, don't worry Emmett, I'm fighting. I'm fighting dirty! _

Oops! Almost laughed at that one! _Come on Emmett; say the magic words so we can put you out of your misery!_

And then I heard it, the magic words. _"I swear, Bella, if you can pull through this I won't prank you again while you're human..." _Bingo!

I started moving my eyelids, making them flutter, pretending I was coming back. "Edward…" I said softly, sounding so weak.

"Bella, love, I'm here. Your father is here too, as is the family." Edward was kissing my hand gently. _What is he trying to do! Make my heart rate go through the roof! He knows what that does to me!_ I dug my nails into his hand, knowing it wouldn't hurt but communicating that he needed to cut it out!

"Edward…I feel so weak…"

I could see Emmett out of the corner of my eye, hanging his head and looking sad.

"Edward, why is it so bright in here? What is that light?" I could hear gasps in the room as everyone realized what I was referring to. I could hear Emmett's quiet, "No!" _Oh, Emmett, do you think the lights are the heavens calling for me?_

"Where's Emmett? I need to talk to him. Where is he?" I asked, squinting my eyes as if blinded by the light.

Emmett came closer and took my other hand in his. "Hi Bella, I'm here. I'm glad you're back with us. How are you feeling?"

"I think I've had better days Emmett."

I could hear the anguish in Emmett's voice as he broke down. "Bella, you have to fight this, fight to stay with us!"

"I don't know if I can Emmett. It's so hard to breathe; everything hurts…" I acted like I was starting to lose consciousness. Emmett cried out my name and I pretended to wake again.

"Emmett, I can feel myself fading." Emmett was going to interrupt, but I stopped him with my hand, and continued. "You've always been like a big brother to me and I love you. I'm going to miss you…"

Emmett's face was so sad! Thank you Jasper! Even I could feel the emotions he was sending towards Emmett. Wow!

_It's time to wrap this up._

I motioned for Emmett to come closer the bed, whispering to make him come even closer.

"Don't be sad, Emmett. Just remember the good times. Please watch over everyone, especially Edward. Promise me you'll do that!" I saw him nod his head, his shoulders shaking as I realized he was sobbing! "There's one more thing I need to say to you, Emmett…" I motioned for him to come closer and then whispered when he was close enough, "Emmett…you've been Punk'd…" I opened my eyes wide and looked at him with a smirk on my face.

Emmett looked at me, not sure if he had heard me right, but the looks on everyone's faces told him the story. THE KING OF PRANKS HAD BEEN PUNK'D!!!!

"YES!" I yelled as I jumped up from the bed, nearly falling flat on my face before being caught by Edward in the knick of time.

The whole family, including my dad, started laughing. Jasper was in the corner with the biggest smile I'd ever seen on his face, while Emmett stood completely still, stunned! I have never seen the man speechless, but we had done it! King of Pranks no more!

Alice was running around the room doing a little victory dance, while Jasper turned the camcorder around the room to catch everyone's expressions as well as Emmett's still stunned reaction.

**Emmett's POV**

Bella motioned me to come closer and as I bent my head closer she whispered, "Emmett…you've been Punk'd…"

_What did she just say? No, it couldn't be! _ I closed my eyes and opened them to see Bella, eyes wide open and a smirk on her face. _I'd heard right!_ And if that wasn't enough confirmation, the looks on everyone's faces told the story. Everyone in the room started laughing, while I continued to sit motionless, too stunned to move.

I could see Jasper out of the corner of my eye, camcorder in hand and filming the reactions of everyone in the room, including mine.

_What the…? _I can't believe it! I'd been pranked by my whole family! I, EMMETT CULLEN, KING OF PRANKS, HAD BEEN PUNK'D!!! Aw man!!!

I remained motionless, replaying the events of the day in my mind. It was as if a light had suddenly turned on in my head as I realized it wasn't just one prank that had been played on me. I'd been "punk'd" all day long!!!

The sound of my clothes ripping, the crazy TV/remove control thing, my video games disappearing and being replaced by kids' video games… these were the opening pranks! What about the dent in Rosalie's car? Oh god, that was a prank as well and Rosie had been in on it! What was the name of that guy on the note? Mr. U. Binhad…Mr. U. Binhad…Oh no! Mr. "You've Been Had"! They'd got me good! I didn't even catch that one!

I knew the Jeep disappearing had been a prank by Edward and Alice, but now I realized that the bust in the parking lot at Newton's Olympic Outfitter's, the news team covering the arrest (Rita Skeeter from Harry Potter! I can't believe I missed that one too!), and Charlie's interrogation at the police station, all of it had been part the act. And then there was Bella at the end. How many times have I told her she can't act and here she goes, completely fooling me into thinking she was dying, aided and abetted by Edward and Carlisle!

EVERYONE HAD BEEN INVOLVED! Esme, Rosalie, Alice, Charlie, Carlisle, Edward and Bella. And Jasper! No wonder I'd been on an up-and-down emotional rollercoaster ride all day long! Jasper had been playing my emotions all day long! And I'd thought I was losing my mind!

I counted the number of pranks. SIX! I'd been had; it was as simple as that. I'd been beaten at my own game! And by a human, no less, with the help of those I was now starting to consider my _former_ family!

I slowly got to my feet as everyone continued to laugh, shaking my head and trying to process how I'd been pranked so thoroughly.

I turned towards Bella who was still laughing in Edward's arms. "Aw, Bella! I can't believe it. You got me good, all of you did."

This made everyone laugh even harder. Something tells me I wasn't going to live this down for a long time. At least not in this century!

Bella walked over to me and stood in front of me before pulling me into a hug. She stepped back and said, "Sorry, Emmett, but a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do. Payback is such a bi…"

I put my hand to her mouth. "Don't say it," causing everyone to start laughing again. "You're right, I asked for it. What can I say?" I paused, still trying to take it all in. "I didn't know you had it in you, Bella! I guess you've been taking notes, huh?"

I said this with a smile, starting to see the humor in the situation.

"Well," said Bella, looking at her co-conspirators in the room. "I can't take all the credit. I had help from some very motivated people!" She gestured towards everyone in the room before raising herself up on her toes and whispering loud enough for everyone in the room to hear, "Who's the "King of Pranks" now? Or maybe we should change that to "Queen of Pranks"?

Everyone started laughing again as Bella gave me a quick wink and returned to Edward's side. I glanced around the room, looking at each of her co-conspirators. Edward and Alice's participation was a given, but the participation of everyone else was somewhat surprising and I knew the expression on my face communicated that thought to the entire room.

Edward heard what I was thinking and shook his head. "Emmett, is it really so surprising that anyone who loves or is fiercely protective of Bella would not want to help her take her revenge against the person who made her weekend a living hell?"

_He's got me there. _

Edward continued. "Besides, you're the self-proclaimed "King of Pranks" and what Cullen would turn down the chance to prank the "master" himself?"

That one I could easily believe.

I turned to Rosalie. "And what about you? You turned against me!"

Rosalie came up to me and pulled me into a hug. "Well, that's what you get for ignoring my sound advice. Didn't I tell you not to cross Alice? Didn't I warn you to be careful when it came to Bella's safety? You blew me off! So I volunteered my assistance when your actions landed Bella in the hospital." She gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Believe me, Emmett. It was for your own good!"

Everyone laughed at that, including Charlie. Charlie! He'd been in on the whole thing as well. I turned to face him. His was probably the most surprising, and convincing performances of all. I was completely blindsided by him this afternoon.

"Well, sir, I have to give props where deserved. You certainly pulled one over on me today. The arrest, the interrogation, I bought it all." I said.

Charlie walked up to me and reached out to shake my hand. "A father's got to do what he can to protect his little girl. You understand, don't you?"

I nodded my head. "Yes, sir, I do."

I turned my attention to my parents. "And you two? What was your motivation? You usually stay out of our little pranks and games!"

Carlisle chuckled as he looked at Esme and then back at me. "Sorry, Emmett, but where Bella is concerned you know how we feel."

Esme reached out and hugged me. "That's right, Emmett. Bella is special to us and we care very much when she's in jeopardy or when she's harmed, even if it's by a member of this family. You know how fiercely protective I am of all of you, and that definitely includes Bella. One of my children was in need of protection and I was more than happy to help."

Alice came skipping up to me. "Emmett, don't be upset. You know how protective I am of Bella. And I did warn you, several times, to leave her alone, didn't I?"

_Yeah, she'd warned me alright. I wasn't going to forget anytime soon the ass-whooping she gave me in the forest on Friday. _

Jasper had followed Alice and when I looked at him he just shrugged his shoulders. "Hey, what can I say? I've never been able to turn down a damsel in distress, especially when one of her champions is my Alice. Plus getting the chance to punk the king of pranks? There was no way I was going to turn down that opportunity! I make no apologies! This is a day I will remember for the rest of my life, and I'll make sure you remember it too!"

I rolled my eyes. Too right…none of the family was going to let me forget it. My only comfort was that they hadn't thought to film any of it. _Emmett, you lucked out, _I said to myself. _Just imagine if they had filmed the whole thing? There's no way I would be able to sit there and have to watch my day of humiliation over and over again! _I breathed a sigh of relief, before remembering the camcorder in Jasper's hand. _Damn! Some of it was on film! Thank god he'd only filmed what had gone on this evening!_

Edward started laughing and whispered something in Bella's ear, causing her to start laughing as well. Edward looked at me, a wicked grin on his face and suddenly I knew it was much, much worse than just a little film of this evening. Edward confirmed what I was afraid to admit to myself.

"Emmett…I'm afraid Jasper will be putting together a video of ALL of today's highlights, starting with this morning…"

_CRAP!!! _

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A/N: So was that evil or what? Did Emmett get what he deserved? R/R, please, let me know what you think!

Oh! Are you wondering if that cameraman ever contacted Ashton about the Cullens? What about Emmett's punishment for losing Prank #5? Is this the end of the prank wars? Check out the final chapter of the story!


	19. Time to Pay the Piper

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyers.

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**Chapter Nineteen: Time to Pay the Piper**

**Cameraman's POV**

I was finally back in L.A. after my Seattle vacation, eager to talk to Ashton about that Cullen family in Forks, Washington. I hadn't been able to think of anything else while I was up there. As soon as the cab dropped me off from LAX, I picked up the phone and dialed Ashton's number.

"Hey, Ashton? Yeah, it's me. I just got back. Listen, the reason why I'm calling is while I was on vacation there was this family that pulled off the ultimate prank… Seriously, dude, it was the funniest thing I've seen outside the show. I think you might want to contact the family and maybe feature the prank on a special episode… Yeah, it is hilarious! This is what happened. I got this call from my agent asking me to film a prank taking place inside a police station…"

**Edward's POV**

Things were back to normal in the Cullen and Swan households. Emmett was on his best behavior. He still teased Bella, but in a harmless way, no pranks involved. Of course he made it a point to mention that he'd qualified his "no more pranks" promise when he said he wouldn't prank Bella while she was still human, but that was okay. When the time came and the prank wars started, Bella and I would be ready.

What Emmett should have been worried about was his punishment for losing Prank #5. Alice and I were ready to collect on it and had come up with the perfect punishment guaranteed to never let him forget that he'd been Punk'd…Cullen style.

Alice said she wanted it to be a surprise for Bella and asked me to let her handle it while I spent the day with Bella at the meadow. She wanted to see the look on Bella's face when she saw what had been done. I have to admit, I couldn't wait to see it either.

**Alice's POV**

Things were finally back to normal. We were counting down the days to Edward and Bella's wedding and her subsequent transformation to vampire. Emmett was on his behavior these days, having learned his lesson. He still teased Bella, but there were no pranks involved. Of course, he kept insisting his promise to not prank her held only until she'd been changed and then all bets were off. He still didn't believe Bella would be able to kick his you-know-what when she was a newborn. No matter. When Emmett started up his prank wars again, we would be ready. I would be standing by my sister and we'd give him another dose of revenge…Cullen style!

However, there was still one last thing that needed to be done before we could put all of this behind us. Emmett still had to face his punishment for losing Prank #5 and I'd come up with the perfect one. Nothing harsh, but definitely a permanent reminder of what happens when he tries to prank the best!

I went upstairs to find my husband. He needed to record what was going to happen. I found him in our room reading a book in the armchair near the window. "Jasper, are you ready?"

He looked up and smiled, reaching around the armchair to grab the small camcorder that had filmed the last prank. He gave me a quick hug and we walked downstairs hand in hand to the living room where Emmett was currently playing video games.

As Jasper hit the record button on the camcorder, I walked up to Emmett and said in my sweetest voice, "Oh Emmett, it's time." His look of confusion quickly turned into a look of horror as he realized what "time" I was referring to.

I beckoned with my finger. "In the kitchen, please. NOW!"

We walked to the kitchen where Esme, Carlisle and Rosalie were already gathered. Edward and Bella were at the meadow, per my request to Edward. They would be arriving back at the house in about ten minutes and I couldn't wait to see their expressions when they saw what had been done.

I patted the stool next to the kitchen island and gestured to Emmett to take a seat. On the island countertop there were two small items: scissors and tweezers. Emmett's eyes grew wide as he realized what was in store.

Oh yeah, revenge…such a sweet thing!

**Bella's POV**

Edward and I had just returned to the Cullen's house after spending the afternoon at our meadow. We walked into the house and I noticed how quiet it was, except for voices coming from the kitchen. It looked like everyone was gathered around the kitchen island. I could see Jasper and it looked like he had the camcorder in hand again. I was beginning to wonder what was going on when Edward started laughing. He was laughing so hard, if he were human there would have been tears falling from his eyes.

"What is it, Edward? What's so funny?" I was starting to laugh just because he was.

After a few seconds he gained control of himself.

"Bella, love, this isn't something I can tell you. You'll have to see it for yourself." He took me by the hand and pulled me towards the kitchen. I was right, everyone was in the kitchen and from the looks of it they were trying to stifle their own laughter. If I didn't know better I would have thought Jasper had given everyone his own brand of laughing gas.

The only one not laughing was Emmett, who was seated at a stool next to the kitchen island. His back was turned to me. Edward pulled me closer and pointed to the back of Emmett's head. _Oh my god! _It looked like individual hairs had been removed from his scalp to form some sort of writing. It was so small a human wouldn't be able to read it unless it was pointed out to them. In Alice's fine script it read:

_**I'm Emmett Cullen and I was Punk'd…Cullen Style!**_

Everyone, including myself, started laughing! Brilliant!

In the background the phone started ringing and Carlisle went to answer. "Hello? Yes, this is the Cullen residence... Just a moment, please."

Carlisle turned towards the room and asked, "Does anyone know an Ashton Kutcher? He's calling about some show called "Punk'd" and he says he's interested in the film footage from the jail interrogation…"

Emmett's head swiveled around so fast if he were human he would have given himself whiplash!

Jasper handed the camcorder to Alice and held out his hand to Carlisle for the phone. "I think I'll take this call, Carlisle." He was smiling as he walked out of the room. About five seconds later Emmett jumped up from the stool and raced after Jasper.

The rest of us, well, we kept laughing. I turned to Edward and said, "So, do we really have to until after I'm changed before the prank wars can begin?"

Edward pulled me into his arms. "Yes, we do, but that doesn't mean we can't start _planning _what we're going to do when the time comes!"

I looked at Edward and Alice and squealed as Edward picked me up and ran to his room, followed by Alice who was squealing because she was always squealing! It was time to start making those plans! When the time came, we'd be ready and Emmett wouldn't know what hit him!

The End.

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A/N: This is the end of my story. Sob! What was supposed to be a 3 or 4 chapter story turned into 19 chapters and I laughed as I wrote each and every one of them. It makes me really happy to know that so many of you laughed as well. I want to thank everyone who left reviews, especially those who left multiple reviews time and again. You know who you are! They were such an encouragement to me, especially in the beginning when I needed the extra pat on the back to keep going. I can't thank you enough for your kind words and thoughtful comments!

Emmett may have lost the battle but he thinks he can still win the war. And so, sometime after the New Year I hope to start work on a sequel. It'll take place after Bella has been changed. Emmett is determined to win back his title as King of Pranks, but he's never gone up against a vampire Bella! Mwah-ha-ha!


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